What We Could Be
by Hidge
Summary: "Some things are gonna work out as if they were destined to happen...as if they were just meant to be." Tag to 8x13 - "If/Then". Contains other characters and various story lines.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: So this idea came to me a while ago and I finally got around to posting it. I would recommend watching episode 8x13 either before or after reading this, and this universe is based on the extended DVD version so Jackson and Cristina are having a fling.**

**Other things I noted about the episode is that it seems like 8X13 Jackson is a little sweeter, a little softer, at least in my opinion. Also, it seemed as if all of the residents know about April being a virgin and that it's a conscious decision.**

**Also, is it just me or did Jesse Williams look even better than usual in that episode? Lol.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own this version of Grey's either.**

* * *

Jackson rang the doorbell for the third time and impatiently tapped his foot on the front step. The lights were on inside so he knew that she was home. She couldn't ignore him forever and he was willing to wait. It was apparent that she had left the hospital very upset and he wasn't about to leave her alone for the night. Her best friend probably wasn't talking to her so she needed someone.

She didn't really have anyone else.

The front door finally opened and April poked her head out. "Jackson?" She called in confusion. "What are you doing here?"

Her eyes were red and puffy, and she seemed a little… "I thought you might like some company. April, are you drunk?"

"Maybe a little," she admitted sheepishly.

"But you don't drink," he countered with a puzzled tone and a furrowed brow.

She simply shrugged as she opened the door wide enough for him to enter her apartment. It was true that she didn't drink but she usually didn't sneak around with other people's boyfriends either.

She's been all about doing things that she didn't normally do lately, why not add one more?

"What have you been drinking?" He questioned in concern.

"Just beer."

Jackson looked towards her living room and saw that a few empty beer bottles littered her coffee table. At least she hadn't chosen to hit the harder stuff for her first venture into alcohol.

A wave of nausea hit her and she placed a hand on her head as she stumbled a little bit. "I don't feel so good," she muttered. "Wait here," she told Jackson.

He did as he was told as she rushed to her bathroom. He stood in the same spot for a few minutes before he got worried and impatient. "April! Are you okay?"

"Yeah!" She yelled back.

He removed his jacket and hung it on her coat rack before slowly walking towards her bathroom. "Did you get sick?"

"No," she answered. "This just feels nice."

Jackson stood in the doorway and looked down at her small form curled up on the floor. He couldn't help but smile a little; the cool tile must feel refreshing on her slightly heated face.

She glanced up at him and said, "It's okay, the bathroom is very clean."

He laughed softly as he took a seat on the floor next to her, leaning back against the bathtub. She was facing away from him so he reached a hand out and began to rub her back. "Do you want to talk about it?" He asked sensitively after a considerable silence.

They had once been close, back at Mercy West they had been very good friends. They had talked about virtually everything. Then their hospital had been absorbed by Seattle Grace and they had been forced to fight for their jobs. They had spent hours in the pit and the OR, and had worked endless overtime shifts, in an effort to impress attendings and prove that they were the best residents that Mercy West had to offer. They had been forced to prove that they _deserved_ jobs at Seattle Grace, it had been "kill or be killed" and Jackson had hated it. Reed Adamson, one of their friends from Mercy West, hadn't made the cut and had moved across the country. The competitive, new environment hadn't been very conducive to spending a lot of time together and he and April had shown interest in two very different specialities and then she had bonded with Meredith Webber. They were still friends but not like they used to be. They had drifted apart.

After a long moment, April spoke. "My life is ruined. My best friend won't speak to me. Alex won't stop calling me." As if on cue, her cell phone in the pocket of her jeans began to ring. "Dr. Shepherd is apparently talking about quitting so I don't even know if I'll have a mentor anymore. Heck, I don't even know if I'll have a job in the morning. And God definitely hates me," she finished quietly.

Jackson began by addressing the one thing that was probably bothering her the most. April's feelings about religion were not a secret. There was a reason why she made the conscious decision not to have sex and why Yang maliciously referred to her as the Virgin Mary. "You spend every day saving babies, I think that God can forgive you for this," he said as he continued to rub her back.

"I hope so," she murmured. "What about my job? Do you think that Dr. Grey will fire me?"

The motto around Seattle Grace Hospital was "whatever Ellis Grey wants" and April had just broken up her daughter's engagement, so he wasn't entirely sure what the Chief of Surgery would do. She had just fired Mandy Bailey for personal reasons. Ellis Grey was brilliant but cold and harsh.

"If she's smart she won't, you're a great doctor," he finally responded.

"Thank you Jackson," she replied gratefully. He was making her feel a little better about herself.

Her phone rang again and Jackson glared at it angrily. From their very first meeting he had detested Alex Karev. He had always felt that the guy's cheerful, brown-nosing demeanour was all an act. The guy was just willing to do whatever he could to get into the Chief's good books, including dating her daughter. "What does he want?"

April sat up and pulled her phone out of her pocket. After some internal debate, she decided to turn her phone off. The desire to pick up and talk to him was very strong but her friendship with Meredith was more important to her and if she wanted to repair that relationship than she couldn't talk to Alex right now, possibly ever again. Also, she didn't want to set herself up for more heartache. No one in their right mind would choose her over Meredith Webber.

Jackson watched the feelings of conflict that were clearly written across the red-head's face. She had feelings for the guy, he almost couldn't believe it. "Did you two…I mean, did you—"

She raised her head and quickly interrupted him. "No, we didn't! We never had sex," she added in a lower voice. They had just made out…fairly passionately.

"Oh." That almost made everything even more complicated in Jackson's mind. What kind of guy cheated on his fiancé but didn't even have sex with the other woman? Maybe Karev had feelings for April too. "How did it happen? For how long? Why?" He fired questions at her rapidly. His curiosity was just too much to handle.

She ran a hand through her hair and sighed. "Only for a couple of weeks," she revealed. This was obviously the first time that she had talked to someone about her relationship with Alex Karev and she would most likely be a little more candid due to the alcohol in her system. "I'm not even sure how it started. One night we were both working the night shift in the ER. I went to the supply closet to get some stuff and I turned around and he was there and it just happened. I barely even remember it." She and Alex were good friends, it was impossible for them not to be with all of the time that they spent with Meredith, and she supposed that somewhere along the line she had developed a crush on him. She hadn't given it much thought because of Meredith but then they had kissed for the first time and all of her morals had just flown out the window. Her primal desires had completely overwhelmed her. He made her feel like no other man ever had. She met Jackson's eyes and her face flushed in embarrassment. "He made me feel desirable, that doesn't happen to me a lot, and it was nice so I didn't think about anything else. _So _selfish."

Jackson frowned to himself. It also wasn't a secret that April was scared that she would spend her whole life alone, which he thought was ridiculous. She was insecure but she definitely didn't need to settle for scum like Karev. "April, the guy who gets you is gonna be the luckiest guy in the world."

"Knock it off," she said as tears pricked the back of her eyes. "I'm drunk, not stupid."

"It's true," he replied after a small laugh. "And you definitely don't deserve to be used by Alex Karev."

"We kinda used each other," she protested.

"Whatever." Her tears started to fall and he moved his hand to rub her knee. "Come on, don't cry. Things will get worse before they get better but people turn things around all the time." He had said the same thing today to a patient, hoping to inspire her. It hadn't worked on OD girl but maybe it would help April.

After a moment she murmured, "You don't deserve to be used either." His eyes reflexively widened and she smiled. "I'm much more perceptive then people give me credit for."

Jackson smiled back at her as he considered her words. He had thought that his arrangement, or whatever it was, it certainly wasn't a relationship; with Cristina Yang was a well-kept secret. Apparently he was wrong. He wondered who else knew about them.

"Maybe I should finally go out with Charles," April pondered aloud. "He couldn't even look at me though after…I don't know how I'm supposed to show my face tomorrow." She just knew that she would be the center of the gossip and she couldn't imagine handling that situation well.

Jackson smiled softly. "You got me, remember?"

"Yeah?" She asked with a small smile.

"Yeah," he confirmed. "Me and you…like old times."

Her smile widened and she repeated his words. "Me and you."

Those three little words were more of a comfort to her than anything else she could envision. No matter what happened, at least they had each other.

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**A/N: What do you think? Should I turn this into a multiple chapter fic? Leave a review! :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews! I'm not really sure how I feel about this chapter, I found Ellis particularly hard to write, but I hope that you enjoy it! :)**

**Disclaimer: Same as always.**

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April awoke to the shrill ringing of her alarm clock. She rolled over and her arm emerged from beneath the covers and aimlessly reached out until it slammed down on the button to silence the unbearable noise. She slowly sat up and both of her hands immediately clutched her head. She had the worst headache of her life but she was thankful that she hadn't vomited.

She was never drinking again. It just wasn't worth it.

She glanced towards her bedside table and sighed in relief when she spotted a tall glass of water and a bottle of medication. She took two Tylenol and finished the glass of water before she grabbed her robe and headed downstairs.

She smiled fondly at Jackson's sleeping form on her living room sofa. He had stayed to make sure that she was okay and she was extremely thankful for his presence last night. He had really been there for her and it made her realize how much she missed his friendship. Seattle Grace was a phenomenal hospital but it was too full of drama and complicated political agendas, Mercy West had been much simpler.

She walked up to him and gently shook his shoulder. He awoke slowly and peered up at her. "Good morning," she smiled.

"Hey, mornin'," he murmured in reply as he sat up and stretched his long limbs. "How are you feeling?"

"I have a pretty bad headache," she admitted. "Thanks for the meds."

"No problem." He stood up and yawned as he ran a hand over his closely shaved head. He tried to smooth out his wrinkled clothes but it was futile. He would just shower and change at the hospital. "So how's your first hangover?" He questioned light-heartedly.

She chuckled and rolled her eyes before she began to walk into her kitchen. He followed her as she answered, "I probably won't experience another one for a very long time. So what do you want for breakfast? It's the least I can do."

His stomach growled in delightful anticipation. He lived with Charles and neither of them were exactly top chefs. April's cooking was fantastic, and he hadn't had a home cooked meal in far too long. "Whatever you want to cook will be awesome. I'll start the coffee."

They worked together in her kitchen like they had been doing it every day for years. They moved around each other seamlessly, the majority of the time they didn't even need words. There was a comfortable silence that surrounded them that April truly appreciated. She had always found it difficult to forge and maintain friendships but it had always been natural with Jackson, ever since their first day at Mercy West. She quickly realized that she needed him, especially if Meredith planned on never talking to her ever again.

"Thank you," she began as they ate breakfast at her kitchen table. "For last night. You really didn't need to come over and I really appreciate it."

"It was nothing," he answered with a shrug. "I just thought you might need someone."

"I did," she admitted in a whisper. She paused for a moment and pushed her fork through her scrambled eggs before she told him another confession. "I'm terrified to go into work today."

"Don't be," he assured her. "Everything will be fine, I promise."

She nodded but she wasn't sure if she believed him.

* * *

Jackson's first stop on rounds was OD girl. He stepped into her private room and was greeted with a glare. "How are you feeling?" He asked considerately.

"Like crap," she snapped.

"Well that's what happens when we have to crack your chest," he quipped.

She rolled her eyes and fiddled with the collar of her hospital gown. "How long do I have to stay here?" She questioned in annoyance.

Jackson walked further into the room and stood at the foot of her bed. "Until you get your operation. You need it or you're going to die."

"That wouldn't necessarily be the worst thing in the world," the girl with the dreadlocks and tattoos muttered.

Jackson frowned before he tried to inspire her once again. "Come on, there's only one way to look at this, it's a second chance. A lot of people don't get them so you should take advantage." She seemed wholly unaffected by his words and he knew that she was being stubborn and determinedly resistant. "Well," he sighed, "you won't be able to sneak off and steal my access card this time." He glanced towards the doorway as he said, "There's a security guard watching you."

He turned on his heel and began to walk away but her voice stopped him. "Hey!"

He looked over his shoulder and raised an eyebrow. "Yeah?"

"You seem like a really nice guy so I'm sorry about stealing your nametag. I hope that I didn't get you into any trouble."

"You didn't," he replied with a small smile before he left the room.

* * *

April nervously crossed and uncrossed her legs as she waited for Dr. Grey. She had been summoned to the Chief's office before she had even gotten the chance to change into her scrubs, and now she was anxiously waiting for the legendary general surgeon to open the door and call her inside. She had a feeling that Dr. Grey was making her wait for a reason, so that she'd be more on edge and nervous.

She knew that she was getting fired so she wanted to get the formality over with as quickly and painlessly as possible. She knew that she could at least count on Dr. Shepherd to write her a decent recommendation letter. It was plausible that she could get a job at a decent hospital and log enough hours in the OR in order to take her Boards on time.

The office door swung open and hit the wall with a loud 'thud'. "Kepner," Ellis Grey barked, "come in!"

April gulped and sent up a silent prayer before she walked into the Chief of Surgery's office. She sat at the conference room table that the attendings used for their morning staff meetings and tried not to cower under Dr. Grey's hard, stern gaze.

"You humiliated my daughter," she stated bluntly as she got right to the point.

April opened her mouth to respond but no words came out.

"You behaved inappropriately in my hospital," Dr. Grey continued. "I'd be angrier if I was dealing with a member of my staff who I saw more potential in but—"

April visibly cringed and couldn't help but blurt out, "That's not fair."

The older woman arched an eyebrow in challenge. "Excuse me?"

April took a deep breath before she responded. She wasn't sure what had gotten into her but she wasn't about to let Ellis Grey unjustifiably insult her. "I said that's not fair. I am a great doctor. I have received excellent evaluations, and you know that I should have been named Chief Resident, all of the attendings said so. You're treating me unfairly because I did something horrible to your daughter and I'm sorry. I wish I could take it back but you can't fire me for personal reasons. That's just not fair." She took a small pause before she added, "I'll sue for unlawful dismissal."

There was a long, awkward silence and April gulped loudly.

"Okay Dr. Kepner," the Chief of Surgery spoke slowly. "You are free to go and catch up on rounds."

April's eyes widened and she was incredibly confused but she was not about to question it. She fled the room and headed to the residents' locker room.

She changed into her scrubs and sent Jackson a quick text message.

_I just yelled at Ellis Grey and I somehow still have a job._

He replied instantaneously and her phone buzzed in her hand.

_You did what?!_

She couldn't help but smile at his use of punctuation.

_I'll tell you about it over lunch._

She slipped her cell phone into the pocket of her lab coat before she left the locker room and started to walk towards the Neonatal Unit.

* * *

For some reason Jackson had not anticipated that the division amongst the fifth years would be so apparent, but it was glaringly obvious as soon as he stepped into the cafeteria. Alex Karev was sitting by himself, Meredith was sharing a table with Cristina of all people, and Charles was stuck in surgery. After thinking for a moment, Jackson grabbed enough food for two and promptly left the cafeteria.

He ran into April and gently grabbed her wrist. "Come on," he responded to the puzzled look on her face. "Let's eat in the tunnels."

They took the elevator down to the basement of the hospital and found an abandoned gurney to sit on. They ate their lunches in peace, without any interruptions, and Jackson chuckled as April told him the story of her meeting with the Chief.

"April Kepner has huge balls," he laughed to himself. "Who knew?"

April laughed bashfully and felt her face flush. "I honestly don't know what came over me. It's like I had no control over what I was saying. I just snapped."

"Well I think it's great," he smiled brightly. "More people need to stand up to Ellis Grey."

"How is your day going?" She casually changed the subject. His praise was starting to embarrass her.

"Alright," he shrugged. "The pit is a little slow. What about you?"

"Good," she answered slowly. She had scrubbed in on a surgery with Dr. Shepherd so her day had been going good so far. She still had a job so that was a plus. But she had barely spoken to anyone besides Jackson. "I haven't talked to anyone though, not Meredith or Alex, or even Charles."

Jackson thought for a moment before he replied. "That might be for the best. Everyone might need a little space. Just give it a little time; things will go back to normal."

April nodded as she bit down on her bottom lip. She knew that Jackson was right but she was going to have a difficult time taking his advice. She wanted to try to repair her relationship with Meredith as soon as possible and as terrible as it sounded, she wanted to speak to Alex too.

She was a horrible person.

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**A/N: Please let me know what you think!**

**The next chapter will shed light on Jackson and Cristina's relationship, Meredith and April will talk, and Alex will make a major appearance!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Again, sorry for the wait! I hope that you enjoy the update! This world is both fun and challenging to explore. :)**

**Disclaimer: Same as usual.**

* * *

Jackson smiled as OD girl gradually awoke from sleep and slowly opened her eyes. He had found himself unable to leave the hospital for the night without checking on her first.

Cristina had flawlessly performed her surgery and OD girl now had a perfectly working ICD underneath her skin. At least now he knew that she wouldn't drop dead at any given moment. Her heart was now electronically stabilized.

"How did my operation go?" She croaked.

"It couldn't have gone better," he smiled.

"Great," she nodded. She gently placed her hand on her chest where the device was implanted. She could make out its shape underneath her skin. It was weird. "When can I get outta here?"

Jackson frowned, but he should have figured that she would be looking for her next opportunity to bolt. "We're going to keep you here under observation for the next few days. Just in case there are any post-op complications."

"Will you be monitoring me or will it be that bitch on wheels?"

The surgical resident couldn't help but laugh. "Dr. Yang is not that bad."

The young woman scoffed and rolled her eyes. "Right," she agreed sarcastically. "She's like a vulture. She probably trolls for surgeries, am I right?" He averted her eyes as he looked down at the clipboard in his hand and her laughter increased in volume. "I am so right."

There was a pause in conversation in which they exchanged a small smile before she spoke again. "My name is Lexie by the way."

Jackson smiled brightly as he gently shook her outstretched hand and formally introduced himself. "Nice to meet you Lexie, I'm Jackson Avery."

She gulped before she admitted, "I'm Lexie…Grey."

Jackson's mouth dropped open in shock as he processed her confession. "You're…?"

"Yup," she replied glumly. "My Dad was Ellis Grey's first husband. Meredith Webber is my sister."

* * *

April changed out of her scrubs and was about to leave the residents' locker room when Meredith walked in. "Mer," she breathed in greeting.

"Hey April," the other woman responded.

Well it wasn't the friendliest salutation that she had ever received but at least Meredith was speaking to her.

"I never got a chance to really tell you how sorry I am. I—"

Meredith interrupted her by raising her hand. "I know you are April, I just don't want to hear it," she sighed.

The red-head anxiously bit down on her bottom lip as Meredith went about changing into her street clothes. She thought that they were going to continue to stand in silence until the blonde spoke again.

"As much as I want to hate you, I can't help but feel a little thankful."

"What?" April questioned in shock.

Meredith turned towards her and nodded to confirm the validity of what she had just said. After bonding with Cristina Yang and spending a night conversing, and flirting, with Derek Shepherd, she had come to a flurry of realizations. She had had epiphanies involving her love life, her family, and her career path. "The more that I think about it, the more I realize that Alex and I don't fit together. We're not meant to be. I tried too hard to change him," she said as she shook her head and looked down at her shoes. She knew that you weren't supposed to try and change the people you love and yet she had done just that with Alex. "So I'm finished with him, and I'm finished trying so hard to please my mother." She chuckled softly as she said, "I heard that you stood up to her."

"I did," April admitted bashfully.

"Good," Meredith laughed. "More people need to." She paused and took a deep breath before continuing. "I'm moving out of the house. I _need_ to get out from under her thumb."

"You could stay at my place?" April offered hopefully.

"Thanks, but I'm staying at a hotel for now, until I find a place of my own. But do you want to go get something to eat and talk?"

April's actions had been indisputably awful but Meredith didn't want to just cut the red-head out of her life. She wasn't willing to forgive Alex but she was willing to work on this relationship. April was extremely vulnerable and Alex knew that, and she knew how he could be with women. He knew just what to do and say. He was a slimy little snake.

April smiled broadly and excitedly replied, "Yes, I would love that."

"Okay, I'll meet you in the main lobby in a few minutes. I have to check on something," she stated cryptically.

April simply nodded and refrained from asking any probing questions. She grabbed her purse and headed out of the room. "See you soon!"

She walked towards the elevator at the end of the hall and patiently waited. Her mood had lifted significantly and she felt much more optimistic about her life returning to normal. The metal doors slid open and upon viewing the elevator's lone occupant, she instantly got the urge to spin on her heel and walk away.

As if reading her thoughts, Alex stared at her and spoke quietly, "Don't run, April."

She took a deep, calming breath before she stepped forward with her head held high. She wasn't going to let Alex Karev dictate whether or not she did something as simple as ride an elevator. She turned around so that her back was to him and she pressed the button for the main floor.

"April, can we talk?" He asked once the elevator began to move.

"I have nothing to say to you," she whispered. That was actually a lie. She had thousands of things to say to him but not a single one of her thoughts was appropriate. "I regret everything that happened between us."

"You don't mean that," he retorted.

She tensed as she heard him take a step towards her. "Alex, don't," she warned. He had always made the first move and she was afraid of what he was doing. However, she knew that this time she was not going to give into him. While he made her feel desirable, he also made her feel like a slut, and a liar, and an untrustworthy friend, and she hated that far more than she enjoyed being with him.

He stood behind her and she could feel his breath on the back of her neck. "Meredith and I are not getting back together."

"Why are you telling me this?" She questioned in frustration.

"Because there's a reason why we did what we did," he explained.

"Yeah, and it wasn't a good reason," she muttered firmly.

The elevator halted and April sprinted out as soon as the doors opened. She spun around to face him and she appeared angrier than he had ever seen her.

"Meredith is my best friend. She's important to me so I don't want anything to do with you. You only wanted me for one reason anyway."

"That's not true," he tried to argue.

"I'm making the decision to stay away from you and I would appreciate it if you respected that. We create our own destinies, right?" She asked spitefully. He cringed and she nodded in vindication. "That's what I thought."

* * *

Jackson frowned as Cristina slipped out of his bed and started to pull her clothes back on. Once again, they had met on her terms but as usual, he hoped that things would be different this time.

He asked the same question that he did every time. "Wanna stay?" He spoke softly.

"No," the brunette answered without a second thought.

He sighed in frustration as he lay back on his bed. She probably had somewhere else to be. Someone else to see. He was starting to believe that April was right, he didn't deserve to be treated like this, and this certainly isn't what he wanted. He wanted a relationship. He wanted to romance someone, not be someone's desperate booty call.

"Well I'll see you at the hospital," he murmured dejectedly.

"Yeah, see ya later," Cristina replied.

And once she was fully redressed, she left his bedroom without another word or a second glance.

He groaned and punched his pillow in frustration. Despite the fact that the sex was fantastic, dealing with Cristina Yang was a nightmare, and she definitely had no further interest in him. They never had any real conversations when they were together, and they only talked about work at the hospital. She never stayed any longer than she needed to after she got what she wanted. They hadn't even shared a meal together or watched a television program. The more that he thought about their arrangement, the more he wondered what the hell he was doing. He wasn't a teenager anymore, he was a grown man.

Jackson hopped out of bed and pulled on his boxers before heading to the kitchen. He was rummaging through the refrigerator for something to eat when his roommate joined him. "Hey man, want some leftover pizza?"

"Nah," Charles replied. "I think I'll just grab some cereal. Did Yang just leave?"

Jackson pulled out the milk and handed it to his burly friend. "You know about us?"

Charles nodded. "Yeah, I caught her slipping out one night and she threatened to castrate me if I ever mentioned it."

"Well thanks…for not mentioning it, I mean," he said thankfully as he grabbed one of the leftover pieces of pizza and took a bite.

"No problem." Charles poured himself a bowl of cereal before he asked his next question. "Are you guys dating or what?"

Jackson answered him honestly. "I have no idea. I have no idea what we are or what we're doing. I guess it's complicated."

"Like Karev and April complicated?" Charles questioned quietly.

Jackson frowned and felt a touch of sympathy for his friend and roommate. He had such a school boy crush, and had harboured feelings for her for a very long time. Jackson realized that whatever was going on between Karev and April _was_ complicated. April Kepner wasn't exactly the Chief Resident's type and she certainly wasn't your typical "other woman".

"Have you spoken to her since…?"

Charles shook his head. "No. Is she okay though?"

"I think so," the dark-skinned man spoke tentatively. "Or at least she will be. I'll keep an eye on her, don't worry."

* * *

**A/N: Please leave a review and let me know what you think!**

**Jackson and April will share scenes in the next chapter, I promise. :)**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: I have not given up on this story! I apologize for the long wait, other projects took priority but I will not put this story on the back burner any longer.**

**I promised Japril scenes and this chapter delivers. Also, I think that even in the AU world, all that Addison ever wanted was a happy life and family with Derek so that's what this first scene is about. Enjoy! :)**

**Disclaimer: Same as usual.**

* * *

April nervously chewed on her thumbnail as she kept herself hidden behind the nurses' station. She had been charting, finishing up for the night, when both Dr. Shepherds and a man that she had never seen before passed by, and they had been arguing. They had been arguing very intensely and her natural reaction had been to hide.

And she was still hiding because they were still arguing.

"I'm moving to California," her mentor stated.

"What do you mean you're moving to California?" The mystery man asked in confusion. "We decided that we're going back to New York together!"

"This is not how I wanted this to go," Addison Montgomery Shepherd stated sadly.

Derek Shepherd scoffed, "This isn't exactly how I wanted things to go either, but good luck. I hope that you'll be happy, whatever you do."

The neurosurgeon walked off, leaving the famous neonatal surgeon alone with this mystery man. He certainly knew both Shepherds intimately but April had no idea who he could be.

"What's going on, Addie?" He asked in a pained voice. "You told me that you were miserable without me."

"I was miserable because Derek was miserable," she confessed. "And Sam and Naomi are inviting me to join their practice and I need a fresh start."

"What about my baby?" He questioned.

April clasped her hand over her mouth to keep herself from gasping loudly. Derek Shepherd wasn't the father of his wife's baby? So it was true, the Shepherds weren't as perfect as everyone thought they were. This hospital was just getting more scandalous by the second.

"I'm not going to keep you from your child, Mark," she sighed. "I just…I can't stay here and I can't go back to New York."

There was a long silence before the male voice, Mark, spoke again. "So, you don't want to be with me?"

Another long silence before a whisper, "No, I don't."

Again, April had no idea who this man was but she automatically felt sorry for him. He clearly had feelings for her mentor and she was rejecting him. It was heartbreaking. No other words were uttered and she imagined them standing there, just standing at one another. Eventually, she heard the sound of fading footsteps.

She remained under the desk as she tried to make sense of all of the private information that she had just been privy to. She was so engrossed in her own thoughts that she didn't notice the movement beside her.

She jumped when Jackson spoke. "What are you doing?" He asked with an amused grin.

She placed a hand over her chest to calm her racing heart. He had startled her by speaking when she wasn't even aware that he was sitting next to her. "The Shepherds came by and they were arguing and I didn't want them to think that I was eavesdropping so I—"

"Hid under the desk?" He interrupted with a laugh.

She nodded as she felt blush spread across her cheeks. "Yeah."

"Well are you done for the night or do you have more spying to do?" He questioned teasingly. She continued to blush and he playfully nudged her shoulder. "Wanna go to Joe's with me?"

"Sure," she nodded. Even though she wasn't much of a drinker, she could use a night of relaxation.

Jackson hopped to his feet and extended his hand to help her up off of the floor. April stopped by the locker room to change out of her scrubs before they headed to the bar across the street.

"Do you want a drink?" Jackson asked as he held the door open for her.

April wrinkled her nose in contemplation. "I don't know if I should, I don't have a very good track record so far."

He laughed, "You're basing all of your data off of one incident."

She laughed along with him as she nodded. "That's true." She thought for a moment before she decided to be a bit more adventurous tonight. "I'll have what you're having!"

Jackson smiled as she watched her walk towards a booth in the back. She was very attractive when she was carefree, he had never really noticed before. Probably because she spent most of her time focused and tense. He ordered two drinks and carried them towards their table with a smile.

"So, what is it?" April asked cautiously as she accepted the glass from him. It was a golden brown liquid but her knowledge about liquor was very limited.

"Scotch," he answered as he sat down across from her. "Drink slowly," he advised. He had seen her after a few beers and he didn't want her to feel the need to lie on her bathroom floor again tonight.

She laughed, "Okay." She took a small sip from the glass and felt the alcohol burn her throat. It was an odd mix of unpleasant and enjoyable.

Jackson chuckled as he catalogued her facial expressions. "You may need a little while to get used to it."

"I think I like it," she replied slowly.

"So," Jackson began after a pause, "what did you overhear tonight?"

April frowned as she answered his question. "Dr. Montgomery Shepherd is moving to California."

"No way?" He questioned in surprise. The neonatal surgeon was Ellis Grey's most prized collectible.

The red-head nodded to confirm her story. "Which means," she continued dejectedly, "that I may need to find a new specialty." Dr. Montgomery Shepherd was the best and she wasn't sure if she wanted to continue in neonatal under anyone else's guidance. A good mentor was more important than ever with their Boards coming up at the end of May.

Jackson ran his index finger along the rim of his glass as he considered her problem. He was glad that he was committed to trauma, and Hunt was a great teacher. A little bit of a loose cannon but the guy was great at what he did. "You were always really interested in neuro when we were at Mercy West," he pointed out.

She quickly shook her head. "I can't work with McDreary, that'd be so awkward."

"Right," Jackson laughed, "and he's not exactly the legend that he was a few years ago."

April nodded and smiled after a moment. "I'll figure it out." She had logged lots of OR time in various fields so all that she would have to do would be to decide on a specialty and focus on it for the rest of the year. At least time wasn't working against her.

"Yeah, you will," Jackson smiled brightly. He liked hearing her sound so confident, that was attractive too.

Their friendly conversation was interrupted by a familiar, booming voice. "Hey guys!"

Jackson glanced up at his best friend and for some reason, one that he couldn't quite determine, he was not happy to see him. "Hey Charles," he greeted quietly.

The bigger guy slid into the booth next to him without asking and laid his beer bottle on the table. "Hey April," he smiled. "How are you?"

"I'm fine, thanks," she replied timidly as she tucked her hair behind her ear.

It seemed as if Charles had gotten over the animosity he had harboured towards April after finding out about her fling with Alex Karev. Jackson gulped down his drink as he listened to his friend ask April a series of stupid questions. It was kind of pathetic. He felt a pang of guilt as he realized that he was thinking these awful things about a guy that was like a brother to him. He wasn't sure what was happening to him.

"I'm going to get another drink," he stated.

"Can you get me one too?" April asked desperately. She had never been able to handle Charles' obvious advances well.

Jackson nodded before he pushed Charles out of the booth so that he could get to the bar. He had a feeling that both he and April were going to drink a little more than they had originally planned.

* * *

"I can take her home," Charles argued as Jackson opened the cab door and gently deposited April inside.

Jackson turned on his heel and whispered to his roommate, "Don't you think you're coming on a little too strong, not to mention you're acting a little creepy."

Charles frowned before he reluctantly agreed. "Yeah, I guess," he murmured. "Just make sure she gets into bed okay."

"I will." He clapped Charles on the shoulder before he slipped into the cab. "See ya later," he called.

Three glasses of scotch had gone straight to April's head and it was time for her to go home. Charles was more than willing to do the honours but he knew that April would be uncomfortable with that, and he already had experience with this. He was, after all, the first person to ever see her intoxicated.

He gave the cabbie April's address and the red-head rested her head against the window for the entire car ride.

When the cab came to a halt, Jackson took care of the fare before he wrapped his arm around April's waist and helped her out of the car. He guided her up over her front steps and towards her door.

She searched for her keys in her purse as she said, "Thanks for bringing me home. I know that it makes me a terrible person, but I'm glad that you're here and not Charles." She giggled as she triumphantly held up her keys. "Found 'em!"

He laughed as she unlocked her door. "That doesn't make you a terrible person," he told her honestly.

Jackson helped April to her bedroom and he almost couldn't believe how giggly she was. It was pretty adorable. She was very different from the last time that he had seen her intoxicated. He liked the effect that scotch had on her.

She wobbled towards her bed as she crossed her arms and grabbed the hem of her shirt. She pulled the material over her head and tossed it aside before Jackson could say a word. He hadn't expected shy, reserved April Kepner to strip in front of him, and what was more surprising was that she didn't even seem fazed by it.

She tripped over her own feet and he instinctively reached out to catch her around the waist and pull her to his chest.

She giggled as she steadied herself by gripping onto his biceps. "Oops, I'm sorry." She stared up at him intensely before a large smile took over her face. "You have the prettiest eyes. But I bet you hear that all the time, huh?"

He laughed softly as he replied, "I get it every now and then." He couldn't get over how good his hands felt on her slim waist. Her skin was so soft. He found himself enjoying their proximity a little more than he probably should.

He furrowed his brow in confusion when she backed out of his grasp and plopped down on the edge of her bed. He was trying not to focus on how pale her skin looked in contrast to her black bra, or how that same bra pushed up her full breasts. He also liked the way her auburn curls cascaded down her shoulders.

How had he never really noticed before how devastatingly gorgeous she was?

"Can you help me take my shoes off, please?" She asked with a slight pout.

"Sure," he smiled. He knelt down in front of her and unzipped her boots. She kicked them off of her feet and when he glanced upwards he saw that she had already started unbuttoning her jeans. "Uh, okay, I should go now." He wasn't sure if he trusted himself that much.

April grabbed his hand before he could leave and pulled him back towards her. "Thank you, Jackson, for taking care of me again."

"No problem." He smiled as he leaned down and kissed the top of her head. "Besides, you're kind of hilarious when you're drunk."

She giggled again before she tugged on his hand. "Will you stay with me?"

He nodded quickly. "Yeah, sure, I'll crash on the couch again."

"No," she corrected him before biting down on her bottom lip. "Stay _here_ with me."

Jackson swallowed before he answered. "Yeah, sure, let's just, um, get you some clothes." He moved towards her dresser and started to open the drawers. He stumbled upon her underwear drawer and felt his face flush for the first time in years. He had never been in this situation before and he felt a little bit like a peeping tom. "Wrong drawer," he muttered to himself. He breathed a sigh of relief when he stumbled upon her sleepwear. He grabbed a tank top and a pair of shorts and handed them to her.

She seemed to have zero qualms about undressing in front of him so he turned around and ran a hand over his face while she changed.

April giggled uncontrollably as she stared at his back. "You're acting like you've never seen a woman out of her clothes. Don't play innocent with me, I know better," she grinned as she joked.

He chuckled as he slowly turned around and watched her climb into her bed. "You're different," he told her earnestly. They weren't even doing anything and it still felt a little bit like he was taking advantage of her.

"No, I'm not," she mumbled as she cuddled into her pillow.

"Yes, you are," he laughed. He tucked the blankets up around her neck before he walked over to the other side of the bed and lay atop of the covers. He didn't want to get under the blankets with her for fear of getting accidentally handsy.

She rolled over so that she could face him and adamantly stated, "I am not."

He couldn't stop himself from smiling. "It's a compliment, not an insult."

"Explain," she demanded.

Jackson continued to smile at her, she really was adorable. "You're one of the good girls, April. Guys should treat you that way."

The red-head rolled her eyes and candidly stated, "I fooled around with my best friend's fiancé behind her back. I'd hardly count that as good."

He reached forward and gently tucked her hair behind her ear. "Meredith has forgiven you, you have to stop beating yourself up about it."

"Yeah, I know," she sighed, "but I can't."

"Well, try," he told her fiercely.

She sighed again and briefly closed her eyes before reopening them. "I'm glad you're here, Jackson. I missed spending time with you."

"Me too," he smiled.

But they had both changed a lot since they had been close friends at Mercy West. It would be interesting to see if their relationship stayed firmly in friendship this time around.

* * *

**A/N: Please leave a review!**

**Alex and Lexie return next chapter!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: Same as usual.**

* * *

April awoke and immediately grabbed her head in pain. Why did she get drunk for a second time? The answer to that question was simple and obvious: Charles Percy. He was just so…ugh…she didn't even know how to accurately describe him, but she was positive that she didn't like him as anything more than a friend, or maybe an acquaintance.

She was never drinking again. She couldn't keep doing this to herself, she felt like crawling in a whole and dying instead of going into work. She slowly sat up and opened her eyes in intrigue when she smelt food cooking. She looked around her bedroom in confusion and saw that her clothes from last night were scattered everywhere. She couldn't remember anything from last night after declaring that it was time for her to leave Joe's and go home. She had no idea who else was in her apartment.

She prayed that it wasn't Alex Karev. Surely she wasn't that stupid, or was she?

She smiled in relief when Jackson walked into her room carrying a plate full of food and a mug of hot coffee. He was wearing his clothes from the night before but he had removed his sweater in favour of just wearing his t-shirt, and discarded his socks. "Jackson! You stayed the night?"

"Yeah," he responded with a laugh. "You don't remember?" He sat down in front of her on the bed after laying the plate of breakfast on her bedside table and handing her the mug.

She shook her head slowly, sudden movements were painful. "No, I don't remember much. Thanks for bringing me home and making me breakfast."

"No problem," he smiled. "So you really don't remember anything?"

"Nothing after Joe's," she answered honestly. She took a bite of his French toast and complimented him on his cooking skills before a thought occurred to her. "I didn't do anything embarrassing, did I?"

He grinned mischievously as he reflected on their eventful night. He wasn't about to tell her about how all of her self-consciousness had disappeared, that would just embarrass her. "No, you didn't. You did tell me that I have the prettiest eyes."

A blush spread across her cheeks as she replied, "Well, at least that's true. You do have very pretty eyes."

Jackson smiled as he watched her eat. He found himself with an urge to tell her that she had very pretty eyes but he choked the words back down. He didn't want to sound like Charles. He was racking his brain to try and find something to say to fill the silence when she glanced up at him with a soft, playful smile.

"I guess it's going to be my turn soon," she stated.

He inquisitively tilted his head. "What do you mean?"

"I've gotten out of my depth with alcohol twice now and you've taken care of me _twice_," she laughed. "I'm going to have to return the favour eventually."

He waved his hand dismissively. "Don't worry about it. Although," he added after a moment, "if I come up with something I will let you know."

"Okay," she giggled. "I am forever in your debt, Jackson Avery."

He smiled at her as he got to his feet. "I'm going to head into the hospital early and take a shower and stuff. I will see you in a bit." He grabbed his socks and sweater before he walked towards her bedroom door.

"Thanks again, Jackson," she called. "You're the best!"

She bit down on her bottom lip as she heard her front door close. He really was the best. So generous, and caring, and open…She shook her head to rid herself of her ridiculous thoughts. Jackson Avery was so out of her league. There was no way he would ever be interested in her. She was a mess, she was too much work, and her life was in shambles, she needed to change specialties and she didn't have the best reputation anymore. Besides, he was hung up on Cristina Yang.

With a frown, April got out of bed and headed towards her bathroom for a shower. She needed to start learning things from her mistakes with Alex Karev. For example, what she wanted and what she deserved were two very different things.

* * *

Jackson walked into the residents' locker room fresh out of the shower with a towel wrapped around his waist. It was early enough that none of the other senior residents were in yet. He stood in front of his locker and found a fresh pair of boxers. He pulled his underwear up his legs underneath the towel before he tossed it in the laundry bin.

He was in the middle of pulling on his scrub pants when Charles walked into the locker room. "Hey man, good morning," he greeted pleasantly.

Charles angrily removed his jacket and stuffed it into his locker before he fixed the man standing next to him with a hard stare. "You didn't come home last night. What happened?"

"I stayed at April's," he answered casually.

Charles gritted his teeth as Jackson continued to dress. It seemed like he was making a habit of staying the night at April's and they were certainly spending a lot of time together. Charles couldn't help but feel jealous, and if she had picked Alex Karev over him then he definitely didn't stand a chance against Jackson. Not with his pretty face and muscles, and his Avery name.

"So what?" He questioned in annoyance. "Are you into her now? What about you and Yang?"

Jackson finished tying his scrub pants before he looked up at the other man incredulously. He wished that Charles would stop acting so territorial, April was not his. "Back off, Charles. We're just friends," he clarified.

Even though April was pure, and smart, and adorable, and sexy…

And in that moment, the woman that he was thinking about stormed into the locker room in a fit of rage. She threw her purse into her locker and huffed in frustration.

"What's wrong?" Charles asked, beating Jackson to the punch.

April turned towards them and while answering Charles' question, she looked right at Jackson. He could see the tears welling up in her eyes. "I just checked the schedule," she started, "and I'm on general today. Alex and I are working with Dr. Webber."

Jackson stared at her sympathetically. He knew that she had very good reasons for avoiding Alex Karev and the Chief Resident obviously had an ulterior motive for altering the surgical schedule so that he could spend the day with her.

"I'm sorry," he whispered sincerely.

She exhaled heavily as she blinked back tears. "I'll be fine." The statement was more for her comfort than it was for his. "I can do this." She gave the two worried men a small smile before she grabbed her scrubs and headed towards the bathroom.

Jackson slipped on his lab coat before he left the room with a final message for his friend. "I'm not into her, okay?"

* * *

April found Dr. Richard Webber at the main nurses' station and approached him with a smile. She wasn't going to let her feelings affect her work on general so she treated her attending with the utmost respect and she had already familiarized herself with his case load.

"Good morning, Dr. Webber," she smiled.

The experienced general surgeon looked up from his chart, removed his glasses, and smiled back at her. "Good morning to you too, Dr. Kepner," the pleasant man responded. "So nice to have you on my service again. I thought that you could take the lead on my bowel resection today?"

She nodded with a bright smile. "That sounds great!" She wasn't about to turn down a solo procedure and she wanted to continue her streak of good outcomes. So far she and Yang were the only fifth year residents not to have bad outcomes in their ORs.

"And Dr. Karev was kind enough to volunteer to assist," Webber added.

April glanced over her shoulder, in the direction that Dr. Webber was focused on, and spotted Alex striding towards them with a perky expression.

"It's a beautiful morning, isn't it?" He asked excitedly as he pushed his glasses farther up his nose.

April pursed her lips as Dr. Webber responded. "Yes, yes it is! Let's get to work."

He headed down the hallway and April and Alex diligently followed him. The red-head stared straight ahead as they walked towards a patient's room. She would have anticipated that Dr. Webber would have bitter feelings towards both of the residents currently on his service; they had, after all, stomped on his daughter's heart. April supposed that being married to Ellis Grey meant that the man had a large capacity for understanding and forgiveness. He was also rather passive and she realized that even if he was mad at them, he would never show it.

* * *

"So, I think that I'm into her," Jackson admitted to Lexie later in the day.

The pit was quiet and he had taken a stack of charts to her private room to work on while they chatted. They had developed a natural, easy friendship since she had revealed her true identity. They knew each other's secrets and they really didn't have anyone else to confide in.

Upon entering the room, Lexie had been able to tell that something was bothering him, and after a minute or so of some badgering, he had spilt all of last night's and this morning's events, and he had provided enough backstory so that she could understand the complexity of his situation with April.

Lexie laughed, "You're into how she looks in her underwear."

"No," Jackson corrected with a chuckle. But how April looked in her underwear certainly didn't hurt. "I just don't know why I'm looking at her this way now," he confessed timidly. "I've known her for five years."

"Timing is everything," Lexie wisely declared with a firm nod. Bad timing is what had really screwed up her life anyway. Every time that she had tried to get her life back together something bad would happen and she would find solace in drugs.

She groaned as she realized the path that her thoughts had inadvertently taken. Just thinking about drugs made her shift restlessly in her hospital bed.

"You're going through withdrawal, aren't you?" Jackson asked perceptively. Even though the withdrawal symptoms of cocaine were more emotional than physical, they were still dangerous and hard to fight.

"Yeah," Lexie breathed, "but let's talk about you. It distracts me. I was saying that timing is everything."

He complied with her request and responded to her statement. "Well the timing for this sucks, and I'm not even sure how I feel about her. I just know that I feel _something_. Things are different between us now."

"Do you think she feels something for you?" Lexie probed.

"I have no idea," he frowned. "I think she's still hung up on another guy."

Lexie smiled at the look of uncertainly on his face. She had never seen a guy as intelligent and attractive as Jackson Avery act so insecure. This April had to be something special. "I think that I need to meet this girl."

Jackson opened his mouth to speak but Cristina breezed into the room. Her presence alone demanded silence.

"It's time for your checkup," the intimidating resident stated flatly.

She didn't even acknowledge Jackson's presence so he gathered up his charts and left the room without a word. He knew now, without a doubt, that he didn't want to play these games with her anymore.

* * *

April furiously scrubbed her arms as Alex's presence next to her caused every one of her senses to be on high alert. She detested how he made her feel and she wished that it would stop. Their surgery had gone perfectly and she just wanted to get out of the scrub room, and away from him, as quickly as possible.

She was drying her arms when he finally spoke. "It was fun to operate together. I—"

She turned to face him and irritably interrupted whatever positive thing he was about to say. "Don't do this to me again," she told him firmly. "Don't force me to work with you. It's cowardly, and frankly, it's an abuse of your position."

"I didn't think you would talk to me otherwise," he whispered.

"You were right," she replied honestly. She finished drying her hands and pulled her scrub cap off of her head before she reached for the handle of the door. An outstretched palm held the door firmly in place and she eyed it suspiciously. "What are you doing?" She turned around to face him yet again but his proximity caught her off guard. There couldn't be more than an inch between them and the position of his hand meant that she was trapped between his body and the door. "What are you doing?" She repeated, but her voice was shaky and less sure this time.

"I want to do this right." He whispered his words quietly and his breath fanned over her face.

"Do what?" She questioned as her brow furrowed in confusion.

"I always screw up everything good in my life," he revealed. "I always have. I can't help it; I'm self-destructive, like damaged goods or something. The only thing in my life that I haven't managed to completely ruin is surgery, and I really don't want to screw _this _up. I don't want to screw _us_ up."

"Alex." She spoke his name softly, as if she was talking to a child. "There is no us."

His eyes widened hopefully. "But there could be." He moved his hand to massage her neck the way that he knew she liked. "Come over to my apartment, I'll make you dinner."

April's mouth parted and she stared at him in shock.

* * *

Derek guided Meredith into the elevator with a hand on the small of her back.

"So how far into the woods is this trailer?" She asked with a teasing grin.

He simply smiled back at her and remained silent. He seemed to be smiling whenever he was around Meredith Webber. She was what he needed; she was like coming up for air. He had never felt this way before, not even when he had first started dating Addison.

"Not gonna give away anything, are you?"

"No," he smiled. "You'll just have to wait and see."

She playfully pushed him before the elevator stopped on another floor and the doors slid open.

Derek froze as he stared at the man waiting to get on the elevator. "What are _you_ doing here?" He asked coldly. He had hoped that his ex-best friend was already back in New York and out of his life for good.

"I work here now," Mark Sloan replied with a satisfied smirk.

* * *

**A/N: McSteamy is back!**

**How would you people feel about an appearance from Catherine Avery?**

**Please leave a review! Even if it's just a smiley face :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews! I'm glad that you guys are getting into this story because I am having a lot of fun writing it!**

**Disclaimer: Same as usual.**

* * *

Charles opened the front door and smiled brightly at his unexpected visitor. "April," he greeted her in surprise but he was certainly happy to see her. He would never complain about the red-head showing up on his doorstep. "What's up?" He tried to inquire casually.

"Hi Charles," she smiled. "I'm looking for Jackson. Is he home?"

The burly resident's face fell as he pulled the door open wide so that April could enter the apartment. "Yeah, he's home," he muttered disappointedly. He pointed down the hallway past the living room and kitchen. "First door on the right."

April followed Charles' directions and walked through their bachelor pad. It was easy to tell that two men lived here. There was only as much furniture as they needed, there were a pile of dishes in the sink, and there wasn't a woman's touch in sight. It was functional not comfortable.

She approached Jackson's bedroom door and knocked softly.

"Yeah? Whataya want?" He called, or rather mumbled.

She opened the door and gave him a soft, apologetic smile. "Am I interrupting something?"

Jackson raised his head from the book that he was reading and sat up on his bed. "Sorry, I thought you were Charles," he replied meekly. He definitely hadn't expected her.

"Are you busy though?" She asked after nervously chewing on her bottom lip.

He shook his head. "Nope, I'm just relaxing. Come in."

She stepped into the room and closed the door behind her. She removed her jacket as she closely observed her surroundings. His room was relatively neat and it had a different feel than the rest of the apartment. His desk was tidy, there were only a few articles of clothing in view, and a basketball sat in the corner. The room also featured a double bed, a dresser, and a television. There was a small bookshelf that held medical textbooks and battered novels and several pairs of sneakers lined the wall by his closet.

She laid her jacket on his desk chair before she took a seat on his bed. "What are you reading?" She asked curiously.

"Um, nothing, really," he answered awkwardly as he shoved the book underneath his pillow.

She giggled as she witnessed his unusual reaction. "Well now I really wanna know." He hung his head in embarrassment before he removed the book from its hiding place and showed it to her. "John Keats. You read poetry?" She questioned with a bright smile.

He nodded reluctantly. "Yeah, every now and then when I'm feeling stressed. My Mom made me read a lot when I was younger, poetry and novels and stuff, and I guess it just stuck."

"Wow," she breathed in astonishment. Jackson Avery was well read, and he enjoyed poetry. She was pretty sure that she could feel her uterus fluttering. She looked away from him as she felt her face flush. She quickly averted her thoughts and changed the topic of conversation. "So, um, what are you stressed about?"

"The Boards," he groaned. "There's just so much to study and I only just started."

"I know," she agreed. She pulled her legs up underneath her as she got into a more comfortable position. "We can start studying together, if you want, that will probably make things easier. Everyone needs a study buddy," she added with a chuckle.

He smiled and replied, "Yeah, that'd be cool." Even though he knew that it was actually a terrible idea. He had a feeling that the more time that he spent with her, the more that he would fall for her, and he did not want to get himself into a one-sided situation again. He continued on that train of thought until he realized that this was an unscheduled home visit. It was out of character for her. "So, what's up? Is something wrong?"

She felt so comfortable talking to him, and she was having such a nice time, that she had forgotten what had initially propelled her to his apartment. "Oh…yeah. So I was on general today," she began tentatively.

"Yeah?" He prompted suspiciously. He didn't like where she was going with this.

"And Alex told me that he wants something to happen between us. He wants to be in a relationship with me." She looked down at his bed sheets as she quietly finished her explanation. "He asked me out and then, when I stared at him in utter disbelief, he told me that I can think about it for as long as I want."

Jackson had to admit that he was just as shocked as she was. Just what exactly was that little weasel up to? But he could tell that she was considering it. If she was planning on flat out refusing him then she wouldn't want to talk about it. As much as she tried to fight it, she had feelings for that asshat.

April chewed on her bottom lip as she nervously waited for his reply. She knew that he wasn't particularly fond of the Chief Resident but he was fair and he was her friend. She had made the decision to stop thinking about Jackson possibly being anything more than her friend. It wasn't going to happen. Jackson Avery was an ideal while Alex Karev was a reality.

She couldn't bear his silence for any longer so she began to speak again. "I need to talk to Mer about it first, obviously. I can't hurt her again, and maybe it's too soon, I dunno," she rambled. "I'm not good at these things."

And ultimately, she was still very confused about how she felt about Alex.

He swallowed before he offered her the best advice that he could. "Just take your time and think about it very carefully. That's the best thing that you can do."

"Thanks Jackson," she smiled happily. "I knew that you'd be honest with me."

He awkwardly smiled back at her. That statement was rather ironic.

* * *

At lunch the next day, Cristina awkwardly followed Meredith across the cafeteria. "Do we have to sit with the Virgin Mary?" She whined.

Meredith glanced over her shoulder and shot her new friend a reprimanding look. "April is not that bad. You just have to take a little time to warm up to her." They were trying very hard to repair their shattered friendship and Meredith knew that despite their vast differences, Cristina could get along with April if she really tried.

She took a seat at the table next to April and smiled. "Hey."

"Hi Mer," the red-head smiled. She looked up at her uncomfortable looking companion and forced the smile to remain on her face. "Hi Cristina."

The cardio obsessed resident didn't respond but she did sit down. Before befriending Meredith Webber over tequila shots, she had always eaten lunch by herself. She used her lunch hour to study procedures and cutting-edge techniques, read journal articles, and to get an overall leg up on her fellow residents. She wasn't very familiar with small talk, and since April Kepner had come over from Mercy West, she had only spoken to the annoying red-head a handful of times. Frankly, she was shocked that Meredith was still friends with the woman.

"How's neuro going?" April asked Meredith conversationally as she ate her salad.

Despite Ellis Grey's strong disapproval, Meredith had ditched cardio for a new specialty. She actually hated cardio; she had only been interested in it to please her mother. She had always been interested in neuro and her budding relationship with Derek Shepherd drew her to the field even more.

A dreamy smile spread across the blonde's face before she answered. "Great. Dr. Shepherd and I are operating on a butterfly tumor today."

Cristina's mouth dropped open in shock. "He hasn't done one of those in four years."

The drastic change in Dr. Shepherd's schedule was something that the entire hospital had noticed. It had only been a few days since his and Addison's public split but the changes in him were drastic and everyone had taken notice. He was completely focused on his work once again and he was focused on greatness.

Derek Shepherd had gotten his mojo back.

The three women spotted Jackson practically running across the cafeteria and he sat down next to April. His tray hit the table with a loud 'thud'. "Okay, so I heard some of the nurses in the pit gossiping and this is what I have: since Dr. Montgomery Shepherd quit and fled the state, Dr. Breen is the interim head of that department. The Chief has used all of this freed up money to fill the void in plastics."

"Plastics?" Cristina questioned in confusion.

Jackson nodded and looked down at his food. He had been so excited to share what he had heard with April that he hadn't even noticed that Cristina was sitting at the same table. "Plastics," he confirmed with less enthusiasm. "There's a new attending."

"Mark Sloan," Meredith supplied.

Jackson furrowed his brow in bewilderment. "Yeah, that's his name, how did you know?"

"I ran into him last night on my way out of the hospital," she replied.

April opened her mouth to ask Meredith a question but she spotted Alex enter the cafeteria out of her peripheral vision. Her question quickly turned into an excuse to leave. She wasn't ready to talk to him yet so she was avoiding him. "I should go. I'm on Dr. Robbins' service today and she has a large case load. I need to get back to work."

Jackson watched April leave before he had the chance to dish the juiciest piece of information that he had overheard. "Also, there's a rumor floating around that the hospital board is investigating Chief Grey."

Cristina turned to Meredith, as if to ask, "Is that true?" And Meredith merely shrugged. She had moved out of her childhood home and now only spoke to her mother when it was necessary for work, she had absolutely no idea what was happening in her life.

But she couldn't help but think that, if the rumor was true, maybe it was time. Seattle Grace could do even greater things under somebody else's leadership.

* * *

After a very long shift in the pit, Jackson changed into his clothes and headed to peds to see April. She wasn't very hard to find, she was charting at the main nurses' station. He approached her cautiously and spoke softly. He hadn't seen her since lunch and she hadn't seemed like herself.

"Hey, you wanna go to Joe's with me?"

"No, thank you." She raised her head slowly and chewed on her bottom lip. "I really need to talk to someone and I think that I'm going to do it tonight."

He took a step closer to her and whispered, "I thought that you could talk to me." He couldn't help but feel a little offended, and slightly hurt, by her words.

"I can," she smiled softly. She reached out and gently placed her hand on his forearm. "I mean that I need to talk to someone about my faith, like a pastor."

"Oh." He laughed softly because he felt a little bit like an idiot after hearing her response. "Well that's good," he said supportively. He knew that she was battling with how her recent mistakes were viewed in the eyes of God. Talking to someone about it would be good for her. "And if you're feeling stressed than you can just read some poetry, I pretty much have an entire library," he added playfully.

Her smile widened considerably. "Thank you, Jackson. I will see you tomorrow."

"Bye," he replied before turning around and leaving with a smile.

He took the elevator down to the main lobby and was surprised to see Cristina emerging from the elevator next door.

"I'll be over around eleven," she told him casually as she stopped in front of him.

He paused for a beat before he responded. "No," he answered simply.

She stared at him in shock and arched an eyebrow. "No?" She repeated incredulously. He never turned down sex. What man did?

"No," he repeated with a nod. He shrugged and a small smirk played at the edge of his mouth as he slowly started to walk backwards, and away from her. "I guess we're doing things on my terms now."

* * *

**A/N: Please leave a review!**

**Next chapter: the Seattle Grace debut of Mark Sloan! :)**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Thanks for reviewing! :)**

**Disclaimer: Same as always.**

* * *

"So what's going on?" Meredith asked curiously as she leaned back into the comfortable cushions of the sofa and accepted a cup of coffee from April.

Her friend had invited her over for the evening and they had talked about the hospital and work, about new friends and old friends, and they had also touched on the topic of Derek Shepherd. It was just like old times, they were open, honest, and completely comfortable with each other, but Meredith could tell that April had something on her mind that she hadn't worked up the courage to discuss yet.

April laughed softly as she looked down into her mug. "I'm that obvious, huh?"

"Just to me," Meredith answered with a smile. "So what is it?"

"Alex asked me out on a date," she revealed. She had invited Meredith over for this exact purpose but it still wasn't an easy conversation to have.

"Oh," Meredith whispered in shock.

She was happy with Derek. He made her feel…different…better than anyone else ever had. And she definitely didn't want Alex Karev back, but he was still a sore spot for her.

Upon observing the blonde's reaction, April instantly felt like the world's worst person. Meredith seemed nothing but happy since she had come to terms with the end of her relationship but it was impossible for her not to still care about her ex-fiancé. They had dated for years, it was unavoidable. April was unbelievably inconsiderate to even consider accepting Alex's offer. Meredith was too important to her, she shouldn't even be thinking about it.

After talking to a pastor a few nights ago, April had been feeling much better about herself. He had reminded her that she had God's forgiveness and that she wasn't a bad person. He had also reminded her that April loved her family, friends, and patients dearly and love covers a multitude of sins. She felt renewed and she was trying to treat herself better. She was desperately trying to forgive herself.

Silence lingered between them until Meredith spoke quietly, "It sucks, but you can't help who you fall in love with, April."

The red-head furrowed her brow thoughtfully. She wasn't sure how to respond to that. She wasn't sure if she was in love with Alex, and she didn't think that he was in love with her either.

"I just want to see what happens…where it could go."

Meredith nodded in understanding. Maybe Alex and April could be good for each other. She knew deep down that if Alex had truly loved her, and had been committed to her, then he wouldn't have set his sights on April in the first place. She just hoped that he didn't hurt April the way that he had hurt her. "I won't hold this against you; just try not to rub it in my face."

"Of course not!" April retorted quickly. "I would never do that to you." She reached out and gently took Meredith's hand. "You're my person."

Meredith smiled before she chirped, "Even though lately Jackson's been your person?"

"He has been really good to me since…ya know," she murmured awkwardly. "He's a great friend."

Meredith continued to smile as April explained all of the nice things that Jackson had done for her. A part of her hoped that April could move on from Alex and get together with Jackson. There was only one other person that could read April as easily as she could and that person was Jackson Avery. She had always thought that they would make a cute couple.

* * *

On Monday morning, April changed into her light grey scrubs before heading to the Chief Resident's office. Since Chief Grey always had a meeting for the department heads and other senior attendings on Monday mornings, she had a little time to kill before she had to report to Robbins. She had decided to use that free time to talk to Alex.

She knocked softly on the office door and was immediately given permission to enter. She felt awkward at first, she had done terrible things in this office, but Alex looked so happy to see her that that feeling quickly disappeared.

"Hey April," he smiled. He hopped out of his chair and quickly walked around his desk. "Good morning."

She slipped her hands into the pockets of her lab coat as she replied, "Good morning." She locked eyes with him and took a deep breath before she exhaled, "Okay."

"Okay?" He repeated in confusion.

"Okay, we can give this a try," she explained. "But let's do it quietly, I don't want to—"

The rest of her sentence was cut off because Alex had covered her mouth with his. At first she was extremely caught off guard, but she slowly returned his kiss. She slipped her arms around his shoulders while his hands tightly grasped her waist.

She didn't want their relationship to be all about _this_…they needed to talk about things…but she was certainly enjoying it.

He pushed her against his filing cabinet and she moaned into his mouth. She had almost forgotten how good he was at this.

They were interrupted by the door opening and Alex cursed under his breath as he pulled away from her. He needed to start locking that damn door. He turned to whoever was standing in the doorway and found a disgruntled Jackson Avery.

"Why am I on plastics?" Jackson questioned in frustration. He had been both surprised and annoyed when he had consulted the surgical schedule and realized that he wasn't on Hunt's service.

"The new attending requested you," Alex answered quickly. "I had nothing to do with it."

Jackson's gaze shifted to April but she was avoiding his eye line and nervously fiddling with the hem of her scrub top. "Right, whatever," he muttered before he left the room.

He guessed that April had taken the time to think and had decided that Alex was worth it. He disagreed completely, but he wasn't about to tell her that. That would be overstepping his bounds.

He headed to the nurses' station to grab Mark Sloan's charts and he could hear footsteps behind him, April was running to catch up with him and he was confused as to why she would do such a thing. Shouldn't she be making out with Karev?

"Jackson, wait!" She called.

When he reached the nurses' station, he spun around and plastered a smile on his face. "You don't have to explain anything to me, April. It isn't my business."

She frowned at the cold tone of his voice. He never spoke to her that way and she felt like she did have to explain herself to him. He knew more about her relationship with Alex than anybody else and she wanted to explain her reasoning and thought process to him.

Jackson stared at her as her lips slowly parted, but whatever she had been about to say was interrupted by a voice that was vaguely familiar to him. "Avery! I'm excited to have you on my service, I wanna see if you live up to your name."

The two residents turned their heads and watched a tall, lean, rather handsome, middle-age man in dark grey scrubs descend the staircase. April quickly realized that this was Dr. Montgomery Shepherd's mystery man, the father of her baby, while Jackson remembered him as the man who had carried Lexie back into the hospital after she had bolted.

"I actually don't have any interest in plastics," Jackson told him honestly. He didn't want to waste his time, or anybody else's, when he had already decided on his specialty. He was a trauma guy.

Mark Sloan arched an eyebrow as he came to a halt in front of him. "I should have known. Averys have always been surgical snobs." He turned his attention to April and grinned. "And who is this? Nobody told me it was 'bring a hot red-head to work' day."

Jackson scowled while April was unable to stop herself from blushing. "I'm Dr. April Kepner."

Mark extended his hand, reaching across Avery's body, and gently shook hers. "Mark Sloan. Are _you_ interested in plastics?" He asked as he closely examined her small hand. "Nice hands."

"Umm, not sure," she replied as she forcefully pulled her hand out of his grasp.

"Well, why don't you get me a cup of coffee and we can talk about it," he proposed with a charming smile.

April pursed her lips in displeasure before she responded. "I'm a fifth year resident, I don't do intern's work, Dr. Sloan."

She spun on her heel and walked away and Jackson couldn't help but grin in satisfaction. He turned back to the plastic surgeon and was startled to see that he looked impressed as well. "Oh, I like her," Mark told the younger man.

* * *

At the end of a rather, mundane plastics filled day, Jackson stopped by Lexie's room.

"I heard that you're getting out," he spoke from the doorway.

Lexie glanced up from the bag that she was packing and nodded. "Yeah, I'm being released, but Dr. Heartless gave me a strict schedule of when I have to come back for checkups."

Jackson laughed at her nickname for Cristina as he stepped further into the room. "So what's your plan?" He asked in concern. He was worried that she was going to fall back into her old lifestyle. He knew that she didn't have much of a support system. She had told him about her dead father and the sister that didn't even know that she existed. She had no one…no one but him.

Lexie reached towards the bedside table and picked up the books about living with addiction and the stack of college brochures and rehab program pamphlets. She knew that he had left them for her, no one else cared enough. "Real subtle," she jested. "The pharmacy tech program at Seattle Central sounds promising." Jackson just stared at her in disbelief and disgust and she laughed loudly. "That was a joke. Lighten up."

He awkwardly scratched his head as he chuckled, "Sorry. It's been a long, shitty day." He could see the curiosity written across her face but he didn't want to talk about April and Alex, he wasn't ready yet. "Seriously though, do you have a plan?"

She exhaled heavily before she answered him honestly. "Not really. I can't afford to do much right now. I might look into a twelve step program."

"Do you have anywhere to stay?" He inquired softly.

She shook her head. Prior to her hospital visit, she had been crashing with a friend who was even more strung-out than she had been. She couldn't go back there, and she didn't have enough money for a hotel room. "But don't worry about me."

"Well I'm not going to leave you on the street," he argued. He and Charles didn't really have the space, they were slobs, and they went through food obscenely quickly. But he had another idea. He knew a place that was stable, clean, and hospitable. "I have somewhere where you can stay. Someone owes me a favour."

* * *

"I don't know about this, Jackson," April whispered as she uneasily toed her carpet and crossed her arms over her chest.

OD girl, or Lexie, as Jackson called her, was currently cleaning up in her bathroom and April couldn't stop staring at the small duffel bag on her couch. Everything that this girl owned could fit in one bag. Lexie was roughly the same age as her and yet their lives were so different. She felt bad for her, and she loved to help people in need, but April wasn't sure if this was the best idea. Her past roommates hadn't exactly enjoyed living with her and if she was honest, she found the girl with dreadlocks, piercings, and tattoos a tad intimidating. And she was worried about Jackson. Sometimes he had a tendency to get too emotionally involved.

"She doesn't have anywhere to go and she wants to turn her life around. She needs to make a clean break. She needs some support. Please do this for me, April," he begged.

She glanced up at him and was instantly mesmerized by his beautiful, pleading eyes. "Fine," she sighed after a moment.

She knew that a big reason that she was agreeing to do this was because Jackson was talking to her. He had seemed so distant earlier. She was glad that their friendship hadn't changed because he had walked in on her and Alex kissing.

"Thank you," he smiled before he pulled her into a hug. "If anything happens let me know and I'll find her somewhere else to crash." He kissed her on the top of the head before he stepped backwards. "Now I am forever in _your_ debt."

She laughed softly as she gently smacked his chest. "I'm just glad that you're not mad at me."

"Of course not," he responded quickly. And mad wouldn't be the correct word anyway. He was disappointed. He was frustrated. He was jealous. "Of course I'm not mad at you," he reiterated. "If he's really what you want then that's great."

"But?" She grinned. "I can tell there's a but coming."

He wasn't sure what to say to her, and thankfully, he didn't have to say anything. Lexie stepped into April's living room and interrupted their conversation.

"Thanks for the clean clothes," she told April politely.

"No problem," April smiled.

Lexie pulled on the t-shirt she was wearing as she said, "It's a little big but that's fine. Your boobs are way bigger than mine."

April flushed and ran a hand through her hair. "Are you hungry?" She asked to redirect the conversation. She didn't even wait for an answer. "You probably are, hospital food sucks. I'm going to make you a sandwich." She finished ranting and left the living room for the kitchen.

Lexie waited until the red-head was out of earshot before she turned to Jackson with a teasing grin. "A little crazy, but I can see the appeal."

Jackson rolled his eye and ignored her. He reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out one of his professional business cards. He had previously scribbled his home address and cell phone number on it for her. "Here, take this, and contact me if you need anything, and please be a good houseguest, you were a terrible patient."

She glowered at him as she snatched the card from his hand. "I'll be on my best behaviour for your girlfriend."

Jackson placed his hand over her mouth and nervously looked into the kitchen. April was busy gathering things from the refrigerator and she clearly hadn't heard anything. "Don't say stuff like that. She's with another guy."

Lexie stepped away from him and groaned. Right, she knew all about the web of drama that he was caught up in. Jackson and his roommate were best friends who both liked April, who had feelings for a perky guy with glasses, who had cheated on his fiancé with her, and Jackson also had his weird thing with Dr. Heartless. And now, apparently, she was _dating_ the perky guy with glasses. "Okay, I won't, but you seriously have to man up."

"It's not about whether or not I can man up," he defended himself. "I'm not the kinda guy that goes after a girl that's in love with someone else, especially if it's a girl I really care about."

"How do you know she's in love with him?" Lexie pushed.

"Because I know her," he answered with a sad smile.

* * *

**A/N: Please leave a review!**

**For you AK2 fans, I hope you enjoyed that. Japril people, hang in there.**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Thanks for reviewing! So after posting several one shots, some that have not remained one shots, I've realized that that's my thing. I'm the easily peer pressured author. Lol. Oh well. Enjoy the update! :) **

**Disclaimer: Same as always.**

* * *

April tiptoed into her living room and saw that Lexie was still fast asleep on her couch. The blankets that she had given her were pulled up so far that only the top of the girl's dreadlocks were showing.

She walked into the kitchen and turned on her coffee pot. The smell of coffee must have woken her up because Lexie sleepily stumbled into the kitchen minutes later.

"Good morning," April greeted her with a bright smile.

"Whoa, you're way too happy in the morning," she muttered as she slumped into a kitchen chair. "I should have known though, the way that Jackson talks about you."

April smiled as she bit down her bottom lip. Her brain had only registered one part of that sentence. "Jackson talks about me?"

Lexie looked up at the red-head and noticed the faraway, teenage girl-like expression on her face. "All the freakin' time." April hummed as she walked around the kitchen with a goofy smile and Lexie couldn't help herself from grinning. Jackson had told her not to say anything, but he didn't say that she couldn't plant some seeds.

"So, are you from Seattle?" April asked conversationally as she placed a few slices of bread in the toaster.

"Yup, born and raised," she responded unenthusiastically.

"Cool. I'm from Ohio. I grew up on a farm."

"Cool," Lexie replied sarcastically.

April Kepner was nice but geez, she was so chipper. Lexie wasn't used to being around her personality type. She could already tell that she was one of those perky, productive, clean the house from floor to ceiling kind of women. But Jackson liked her, probably because of her tits and her hair and everything else, but still, Lexie was sure that they could find some common ground.

The red-head placed a slice of toast on a plate and a cup full of coffee in front of her with a smile. "So, did your tattoos hurt?"

Lexie stared at her with a blank expression. Apparently it was going to take them a while to find that common ground.

* * *

April passed by the surgical schedule on her way to the locker room. She was slightly perturbed to find herself on Dr. Sloan's service but she was determined to take it in stride. Her new roommate was a recovering drug addict who had just been released from the hospital after major cardiothoracic surgery; it was the farthest out of her comfort zone that she had ever been in her life. After that turn of events she figured that she could embrace plastic surgery. Stranger things had already happened to her.

She walked into the locker room and wished Charles, the room's lone occupant, a good morning.

"Hey April," he smiled as he pulled on his lab coat. He fiddled with his pen as she laid her purse in her locker and removed her jacket. "Um…uh…hey," he began nervously. She turned to him and raised a questioning eyebrow. "I was wondering if maybe you wanted to have dinner with me tonight."

There, he had finally gotten it out. After years of flirting, compliments, and obvious implications and innuendos, he had finally asked her out. Straight up and simple.

April inwardly sighed as she avoided his gaze for a moment. The moment had finally arrived. She finally had to be honest and blunt with Charles. She had been rejecting his advances for years but he never seemed to take the hint. It's not that he wasn't a nice guy, because he was. He was smart, tall, and handsome. He was just a little bumbling and overwhelming. He didn't think before he spoke and he was super disorganized, and she just didn't feel that way about him.

"Charles, I'm seeing someone else," she said honestly.

"Oh," he frowned. "Karev?"

"Yes," she breathed. "But that's not the point. The point is that you're my _friend_."

"Yeah, uh huh," he muttered angrily, "whatever." He grabbed his stethoscope before he turned to leave the room. "Just don't come crying to me when that guy treats you like crap."

April sighed, aloud this time, as she rested her head against her locker. That had been awful; no wonder she had been putting it off.

"Napping, Kepner?" A voice chirped from behind her.

She stood up straight again and turned to Cristina Yang. "Oh, hey, Cristina, good morning." She felt like she had to greet the cardio surgeon since she was Meredith's friend now, before she would simply avoid interacting with her.

"Percy seemed like he had his panties in a knot," she commented. "Did you break his heart?"

April had no idea whether the woman was being sincere or sarcastic so she said nothing in response. Thankfully, Jackson walked into the room to break up the silence.

"Good morning!" He announced as he tossed his bag on the floor. He ignored Cristina and walked to April's side. "How did last night and this morning go?" He inquired quietly.

"Good," she smiled. "So far so good."

"Awesome," he grinned. He desperately hoped that the new living arrangements worked out. He wanted Lexie to keep her nose clean, literally and figuratively, and he didn't want her to take off either.

"So, are you two fooling around now?" Cristina called nastily.

Jackson glared at her over the red-head's shoulder while she muttered in mortification, "I should really go and read up on Dr. Sloan's cases. I'm on his service."

April grabbed her scrubs and walked into the bathroom. Jackson continued to glare at his former lover and she simply shrugged.

"What?" She asked him innocently.

He shook his head in disbelief as he removed his jacket. "Nothing, it's just that if you were a normal woman I would say that you are acting jealous."

Cristina scoffed loudly, "Oh please! Don't flatter yourself, pretty boy." She gestured towards the closed bathroom door. "I just figured it'd be right up her alley. The innocent virgin act isn't fooling anyone anymore."

The bathroom door slowly creaked open and Jackson turned his head to catch April's ashamed and embarrassed expression. She practically ran to her locker, tossed her street clothes inside, and grabbed everything that she needed for the day. She fled the room before Jackson could say a word and Cristina left not long after her.

Jackson groaned aloud before he hastily changed into his scrubs.

"That was really uncalled for," he barked as he chased Cristina to the pit. He had always ignored how cold and calculating she was because she was brilliant and gifted. Watching her in the OR was like an out of body experience. She was also beautiful, but now he was beginning to wonder how he had ever found her attractive in the first place. She had a dark ugliness on the inside.

"Whatever," she shrugged. "Get over it. She will."

Jackson ran past her and abruptly stopped in front of her to block her path. "Do you have to be such a bitch all the time?" He demanded.

They stared at each other in a standoff until the moment was interrupted by Dr. Hunt. "Hey you two, let's get going. Incoming trauma, car vs. motorcycle."

They exchanged one last dirty look before they raced to pull on their trauma gowns.

* * *

April sat on the other side of the operating table from Mark Sloan in a state of absolute glee. She couldn't believe that her first procedure with the new attending was a cross facial nerve graft. Apparently she had impressed him earlier because according to the word around the hospital, the famous plastic surgeon didn't let just anybody take the lead on his procedures. He was a perfectionist. He was the best. She wasn't particularly fond of his attitude but she respected his skill and his work ethic.

"How do you feel about plastics now?" The attending questioned.

He had taken a job at Seattle Grace to find a protégée and April Kepner had potential. He had pulled her file and she had excellent evaluations and a great OR record. He also remembered Addison talking about her and anybody that she recommended was fine in his book. It didn't hurt that the young surgeon was also a beautiful woman. It was superficial, but good looks mattered in plastics. Patients naturally trusted an attractive plastic surgeon.

She had all of those qualities and she had a great set of hands.

"It's delicate," she answered honestly. It was like art, and it was calming and exciting at the same time. It certainly helped take her mind off of Cristina Yang's unkind comments.

"Plastics is beautiful," he began as he continued to operate. "We're not just healing people's bodies, we're healing their souls. We're in the business of making people feel better about themselves. It's not all boob jobs and tummy tucks, there's nobility in plastics that most people take for granted."

April glanced up at him when he finished his little speech. It was easy to tell that he was incredibly passionate about his work. In a lot of ways he reminded her of Dr. Montgomery Shepherd, so she could understand how the two had been attracted to one another.

They worked in a comfortable silence until he spoke again. "You're a natural, Kepner."

"Really?" She asked in shock. She had never been called a natural at anything.

Mark grinned knowingly beneath his mask. "People like Meredith Webber and Jackson Avery, they say that it's inherited. They were going to be surgeons whether they liked it or not. It's in their blood. People like you and me, on the other hand, it's been all hard work, and student debt, and proving that we can do something great even though we come from nothing."

April lifted her surgical instruments as she felt her hands begin to shake. She stretched her fingers out and took a deep breath. "How do you know that about me?" She asked uneasily.

"I can just tell. It's how you carry yourself. You remind me of myself when I was a resident. I was never the most respected, I was often overlooked, I floundered a little, but I never gave up on trying to be the best."

He paused to look up at her and she could tell by the way the skin around his eyes wrinkled that he was smiling.

"People like you and me, Kepner, it's God given talent," he finished. "You can't let that go to waste."

* * *

Jackson finished attending to his last patient from the accident before he purposefully approached Cristina. When he hadn't been working, he had been watching her out of the corner of his eye. A lot of things about Cristina had confused him for the past couple of months but things had fallen into place for him today.

He had brushed off a few previous incidents in the ER but today had confirmed everything for him.

He clasped her wrist and dragged her to the nearest supply closet.

"What do you think you're doing, Avery?" She questioned angrily as he closed the door and pressed his back against it so that she couldn't escape.

"I get it," he began vaguely. "Burke left you high and dry. He went on to win a Harper Avery Award thanks to techniques that you perfected together and he didn't even mention your name. When people at this hospital found out about you two, you became a pariah. I get how that can make anyone a little pissed off."

Cristina crossed her arms across her chest and impatiently tapped her foot. She hated when he did this, when he attempted to empathize with things that he did not understand.

"And I get how falling in love with Hunt could send you into a little bit of a tailspin."

Her mouth dropped open in disbelief and she stared at him in shock and outrage.

He couldn't help but grin at her reaction. "I'm not an idiot. It's obvious if you pay close enough attention." And he had always suspected that there was another guy. "And Hunt is a married man, a family man, a man that refuses to get help for his PTSD. I understand how that would hurt, but that doesn't give you the right to treat everyone around you like crap."

She rolled her eyes and that made him even angrier. "You're going to be great. You're going to be brilliant. You're going to be the best that anyone has ever seen but that won't mean anything if you don't treat people like they're people! Like they matter!"

She remained silent and he sighed as he ran a hand over his head. "Just show people that you have a heart, Cristina," he told her in exasperation. "There has to be one in there somewhere. There has to be some other reason why you do this."

Cristina continued to stare at him as he turned on his heel and left. She now understood why Owen experienced so much pride and joy in mentoring Avery. They were very similar; Owen had said very similar things to her not too long ago. And there was another reason why she did this. She had felt her father's heart stop beating, that's why she did this. But she had never told anybody that because she had never let anybody in.

* * *

**A/N: I really wanted to flush out Cristina's character. She seemed a lot colder in 8x13 and in my mind, no one had really given her a good talking to yet so there you have it lol. And I think Mark Sloan has found his pupil :)**

**Next chapter: April and Alex have a date, Arizona makes her first appearance, and Derek and Mark talk for the first time.**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Thanks so much for all of the reviews! :)**

**Disclaimer: Same as the usual.**

* * *

Alex pulled April's hands out of the sink with a laugh. "You don't have to do the dishes."

"But you just cooked me a wonderful dinner," she protested. "It's the least that I can do."

He dried her hands before he entwined their fingers and started to pull her into the living room. His one bedroom studio apartment wasn't fancy but April liked it. It was clean and comfortable, and this was the first time that it had been just the two of them in this place, they had only ever fooled around in his office. In a way it felt like a foreign environment for her.

He pulled her down onto the couch and opened the bottle of red wine that was sitting on the coffee table. He poured two glasses and handed her one. She sipped from the glass as she tucked some of her hair behind her ear. They hadn't spent much time alone where they hadn't been all over each other, so frankly, this was awkward. They had exhausted the topic of work over dinner and she wasn't sure what she should say.

Alex must have sensed the awkwardness as well because he leaned forward and kissed her. She laughed softly, mostly in relief, before she kissed him back.

He slipped his hands under her top and tugged her closer. She pulled away in order to gently remove his glasses. He had considered wearing contacts for their date but had ultimately decided against it. He thought that he looked weird without glasses. He dropped his mouth to her neck and she threaded her fingers through his hair.

After a few minutes, he huskily asked her a question. "Do you want to go to my bedroom?"

"Let's just stay here," she whispered with a smile.

"Why?" He posed in confusion. "Do you wanna stop?"

She shook her head and placed a quick kiss on his lips. "No. No, I don't wanna stop, but let's just go a little slower."

He chuckled as he eyed her in disbelief. "I don't think that we could go much slower." And he wasn't sure what the point of slowing down was, their relationship had started at such a fast pace.

April adjusted her position so that she sat up a little straighter and created some distance between them. They had known each other since third year, and although this was their first real date, it wasn't in a way. But she still felt like there was something missing. Sometimes she felt disconnected when they were together. She knew that he was thinking about sex but she wasn't there yet.

"I'm not ready," she whispered.

She had always been told to wait for the right person. That's what her mother and her sisters always told her, she had to wait until she was in love. She had a religious upbringing and religious convictions, so it would be best if she waited until she was married but being in love was the only way that sex wouldn't be considered a sin. God would forgive her if she had pre-marital sex with someone she loved, who loved her back. When she had been fooling around with Alex behind Meredith's back, she had tried to convince herself that it was out of love even though it was wrong. She thought that she was in love with him but she wasn't sure. She had never been in love before so she had nothing to compare it to. But she knew that she wanted to be sure, and she needed to know if he had genuine feelings for her.

"How much longer?" He placed one hand on her knee while his other gently held her chin. "I know that makes me sound like an ass but I just want to be with you."

"I know," she smiled. "And when I'm ready, you'll be the first to know." She wrapped both of her arms around his neck and pulled him in for another kiss.

* * *

"Dr. Sloan!"

The plastic surgeon whipped around as he heard his name angrily called by a female voice. He had no idea who would be mad at him. He hadn't done anything to piss any women off, at least not that he knew of. He realized who it was as they came into focus and he was surprised to see Arizona Robbins storming towards him. She was wearing a pretty, blue dress under her lab coat and her long, blonde hair was flowing behind her.

"What did I do?" He questioned instinctively.

She stepped up to him and poked his chest with her index finger. "You're stealing my resident!"

"What?" He responded in confusion. "Kepner?" The female resident had only been on his service for the past few days and he had no idea that he was "stealing" her.

Arizona nodded in the affirmative. "Yes, Kepner. She was specializing in neonatal, she knows the NICU like the back of her hand. I need her as my peds fellow next year."

Mark straightened his shoulders and placed his hands on his hips. "She's born for plastics," he stated confidently.

"Well I would disagree," Arizona argued. "You're trying to steal my girl!"

"Kepner and I, we have a bond. We're the plastics pack."

The blonde raised an eyebrow at his antics and scoffed. "You've nicknamed yourself?"

"Oh yeah," he laughed proudly.

They stared at each other in silence, neither one backing down, until Arizona huffed in frustration. "Let's just page her."

They waited impatiently and both breathed a sigh of relief when April Kepner approached them in confusion.

"I was, um, paged to the nurses' station."

"Yes, you were," Arizona smiled brightly. "We need to know what you're going to specialize in. Plastics or peds? And let's just keep in mind that peds is hardcore."

Mark chuckled and rolled his eyes. "Oh please."

April's eyes widened slightly as she watched Sloan and Robbins begin to bicker. She hadn't expected two attendings to fight over her, but it was a nice feeling. She loved children and she loved working with Dr. Robbins, but she knew that she had to choose plastics. She didn't feel as comfortable or valued in any other specialty. She knew that she hadn't spent as much time in plastics, but she loved it. She enjoyed learning from Dr. Sloan. He was double board certified, he had invented his own tricks and ways of doing procedures, and he made her feel confident in her strengths and abilities.

"Plastics," she smiled after a long pause. "I choose plastics."

Mark grinned triumphantly and slapped April's back. "Ha! My girl!"

Arizona scowled at him for a minute before her face softened. "Are you still coming over to watch the game tonight?"

"Yup," he nodded. "I'll bring the beer."

Arizona walked away with a smile and April looked up at the tall attending in confusion. "You guys are friends?" They certainly hadn't seemed friendly until the end of the conversation.

"My new apartment is right across the hall from hers," he explained. "We hang out and complain about women."

"Oh," April responded uncomfortably.

Mark was unfazed by her reaction and he placed his hand on the back of her neck and started to guide her down the hallway. "Come on Kepner, I have a patient that I want you to meet. I've been treating him for a long time and he's flown in from New York for a final surgery."

* * *

Alex grinned as April walked into his office; she was practically bouncing with excitement. He pushed his paperwork to the side and focused his attention on her. "You seem happy?"

"I am!" She announced excitedly. "And I will be on plastics for the indefinite future!" She continued to grin widely as she moved to sit on the edge of his desk.

"Plastics?" He repeated in puzzlement.

She nodded repeatedly. "Yup! Dr. Sloan is amazing. You step into the OR with him and he makes you feel like you can do anything. It is the greatest feeling."

Alex smiled as he watched her gush over plastics. It was nice to see her so happy but he couldn't help but feel envious. He wasn't getting any big or exciting surgeries in general. Dr. Grey had essentially blacklisted him since it had come out that he had been cheating on Meredith. He was stuck on Webber's service and it was boring. He was even starting to miss Bailey.

Alex interrupted April's rant by lifting himself out of his chair and pressing a kiss to her lips. "Do you want to come over tonight?" He asked eagerly.

"I can't," she frowned. "I'm studying for the Boards with Jackson tonight. You should come over and study with us!"

Alex wrinkled his nose in displeasure. He didn't want to spend any more time with Avery then he needed to and he definitely didn't want to share his girlfriend with the guy.

As if on cue, the pretty eyed surgeon stepped into his office doorway and smiled brightly at April. "I heard you picked plastics."

"I did," she responded excitedly as she hopped off of Alex's desk. She ran towards him and playfully pushed on his chest. "I'm doing a face transplant at the end of the week!"

The two Mercy Westers began to chat and April smiled and waved goodbye to Alex before she started off down the hallway with Avery.

Alex snapped the pencil in his hand as he muttered, "Douche."

His life sucked. His career was turning stale and he was still only a resident, his girlfriend wouldn't have sex with him, and the biggest exam of his life was quickly approaching. It was becoming harder and harder to keep up the positive, energetic façade that he had put on since beginning his internship at Seattle Grace.

Everything would have been perfect if he hadn't of gotten greedy. He had been in the perfect place professionally, studying under the amazing Ellis Grey, and had had the perfect fiancé and he had screwed everything up because he had had the fleeting thought that April Kepner would be a fabulous lay.

How ironic.

He was trying to do his best to make things work with the red-head because he didn't know where else to go from here. He wasn't sure what else to do. He cared about her. She was beautiful and smart, and so many other great things. But she wasn't Meredith, and Meredith wouldn't take him back. No matter how many messages he left on her machine.

He had tried too hard to have everything and now he had nothing. He created his own destiny, that's what he always told himself, but so far he was doing a pretty piss poor job of it.

* * *

"Mark!"

Mark Sloan groaned before turning around. "Why is everyone yelling at me today?" He asked himself quietly.

He was surprised to see Derek walking towards him. The neurosurgeon hadn't spoken a word to him since the night in the elevator when he had broken the news that he was going to be working at Seattle Grace.

Derek refrained from greeting him and got to the point right away. "Stay away from April Kepner." He was doing this as a favor for Meredith. His new girlfriend was concerned for her friend and she had confided in him that the last thing that April needed was to be pursued by an attending, especially one with a womanizing reputation. He was only talking to the man that he loathed for Meredith.

Mark furrowed his brow in confusion. "Why?"

"You know why," Derek answered. "Kepner is not that kinda girl. She's not going to sleep with you."

"Whoa. Wait. What?" He questioned with a slight laugh. "Who says that I want to sleep with her?"

Derek stared at him incredulously. "Because you're you. You want to sleep with anyone with breasts."

Mark looked down at his sneakers to hide his reaction. He was hurt. When they had been best friends, Derek would have made that comment with a chuckle or a teasing grin, but he had delivered it with such malice that it was evidence of how much their friendship had drastically changed. And Mark was trying to change, losing Addison made him want to change, to try and be better.

He raised his head and looked at Derek seriously. "Do you know how many residents at Columbia wanted to study plastics under me?" His former friend simply looked at him blankly so he continued. "None, and I've never really been interested in teaching until the past year or so but there's no one to teach. No one at Columbia wanted to work with me. I really want a student, that's why I came here, and now I have Kepner," he smiled. "She wants to learn and she's good. I'm not interested in sleeping with her. I'm not interested in sleeping with anyone right now."

Derek wasn't sure if he believed him but he was satisfied for now. "Well keep it that way." He made the move to turn around but Mark stopped him by calling his name. "What?" He asked harshly.

"I'm hanging out with Robbins tonight but do you want to grab a quick drink?" Mark asked tentatively. "I know that I said that we would never be friends again, but it doesn't have to be that way."

"No," Derek answered firmly after a moment.

Mark sighed as the best friend that he had ever had, and one of the best guys that he had ever known, walked away. He was going to have to try harder to repair their friendship. Maybe he would ask Kepner, what was the point of having a student if you couldn't vent to them right?

* * *

At the end of the day, the entire surgical staff gathered at the base of the staircase in confusion. Chief Grey had called them together but no one seemed to be privy to the reason why. Even Richard and Meredith were puzzled.

April sidled up to Jackson with a smile. "What's this about?" She whispered.

"I have no idea," he whispered back. "Hunt has no idea either."

April faced forward as the intimidating Chief cleared her throat and began to speak.

"Good evening, everyone. I decided to announce this now instead of waiting until tomorrow morning." She took a deep breath and plastered a smile on her face before she continued. "I will be resigning as Chief of Surgery, effective immediately, and I will be retiring at the end of June. It has been a pleasure to lead you all," she added diplomatically.

The attendings eyed each other in confusion and started to inwardly speculate about who could be the next Chief, while the residents stood in shock. Ellis Grey, the legendary, three time Harper Avery Award winner, and unflappable surgeon was retiring. It didn't seem real. They had all assumed that she would continue to operate until she was on her deathbed.

"I will be interviewing to fill the Chief of Surgery position this coming week," she spoke again to break the silence. "Good luck to you all."

She descended the stairs and walked back in the direction of her office, and all the while, nobody else moved.

April looked up at Jackson with wide eyes. "Holy crap."

His facial expression mirrored hers. "Yeah," he muttered dumbly. Holy crap indeed.

* * *

**A/N: I hope that answers some of the questions that you guys have about Alex!**

**So this story timeline is based off of when the episode aired (Feb 2), therefore, the next chapter is a special Valentine's Day edition. And there will be Japril! :)**

**Please leave a review! :)**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews guys! :)**

**Disclaimer: Same as usual.**

* * *

The next day was Valentine's Day, and even though love was in the air, all that anyone could talk about was Ellis Grey resigning and who could possibly be the next Chief of Surgery.

"I think the hospital board is forcing her out," Cristina theorized as she and Meredith purchased their morning coffee. "Avery tells us that she's being investigated and then she announces that she's resigning, it's too much of a coincidence."

Meredith nodded in agreement as she handed the coffee cart lady a few dollars. Cristina's story made sense. Her mother would rather resign and retire than have her legacy attacked. Her mother would protect her pride and reputation at all costs. It was a very plausible theory that the hospital board threatened to fire her if she didn't agree to retire. She decided that she would ask her father about it later on, maybe he would know something.

"So who do you think the next Chief will be?" She asked as they headed towards the elevator.

"Well, a month ago I would have said Dr. Montgomery Shepherd." Cristina paused to push the button to call the elevator down to the main lobby. "But now," she sighed thoughtfully, "Robbins might be the front runner."

"Robbins would be good." The elevator doors slid open and they both stepped inside. "Dr. Hunt would also be good," Meredith added. Cristina remained facing forward and didn't offer a response of any kind. She didn't even twitch. "How's that going?" Meredith inquired softly.

Cristina finally turned to face her and spoke dejectedly. "There is nothing to be going. What about you?" She intelligently redirected. "How are things going with McDreary? Actually, you know what? We need to come up with a new nickname for him. What about McDreamy?" She posed excitedly. "He's been pretty dreamy lately."

"Yeah, he has," Meredith smiled happily. "He even has this big thing planned for tonight."

"For Valentine's?" Cristina spat in disgust.

"Yeah," Meredith nodded.

The elevator opened on their floor and they began to walk towards the locker room.

"I feel like we're moving too fast though," Meredith vented. "He has a lot of big plans, like building a dream house in the woods kinds of plans, and maybe I'm not as bright and shiny as I think I am, maybe I'm really dark and twisty." Cristina arched a sceptical eyebrow as they turned into the locker room and she laughed. "Right."

The only person in the room was Alex and Cristina greeted him in her trademark snarky way. "Good morning, Prince Charming." The Chief Resident shot her a disgruntled look and she turned to Meredith with a laugh. "We need a new nickname for him too."

Meredith, although laughing at Cristina's humor, was a bit more polite. "Hi Alex, how are you?"

"Good," he smiled. "How are you?"

"Great," she answered honestly. "Are you taking April out tonight?"

Alex searched her face for any trace of regret or jealously but unfortunately, there was none. "Yeah, I am," he muttered.

"Have fun and do something nice for her," she advised quietly.

Alex nodded as he adjusted his glasses. His ex-fiancé was giving him advice concerning his new relationship. This wasn't exactly the reaction that he had been hoping for. "Listen Mer," he leaned in and whispered. "Have you gotten any of my messages?"

Before she could answer him, Avery strode into the room and announced. "Some of the fourth years are starting to take bets on who will be the next Chief, anybody want in?"

"Yup, fifty bucks on Robbins," Cristina declared as she raised her hand.

Meredith spun around with a smile. "I'll put the same amount on Torres."

"Torres, really?" Cristina questioned incredulously.

"Makes sense," Jackson nodded with an impressed grin. "Torres is Grey's favourite." He removed his jacket before he turned to Karev. "What do you think?" He asked mischievously. He could already tell that the normally perky guy was in a bad mood and he knew that any prodding from him would make it worse. He knew that he should feel bad that pestering Karev was one of his new favourite pastimes but he really didn't. The guy had the girl he was falling for; he could behave any way he wanted.

"Doesn't matter," Alex murmured crankily before he left the room.

Meredith looked at Jackson knowingly and he just smiled with a shrug.

* * *

Jackson's good mood, caused by bothering Karev, quickly deflated as the day passed. At the end of day, Alex was taking April out on a date and he wasn't. He didn't have any kind of a date to speak of; he had had a date for Valentine's Day every year since he was fifteen. But he didn't this year because he was into another guy's girlfriend. His love life had really taken a dive this year and he needed to figure out what he was going to do about his feelings for April because they were getting stronger every day.

When they had studied together last night, he had needed to make a conscious effort to focus on his books and not her. The way that her auburn curls framed her face was breathtaking. He couldn't get the way she smelled out of his head.

And the worst part was that she seemed really in love with Karev, and oblivious to him.

His mood had plummeted and as a result, the last place that he wanted to be was where he found himself in the middle of the day. He was in the operating room with Hunt, Torres, and Cristina. The supposedly happy married couple was discussing their plans for the evening while he and the other resident stayed silent.

Surprisingly, he and Cristina had been on better speaking terms since he had confronted her and so he felt bad for her. He was listening to his mentor talk to his wife about their kids and their romantic evening while knowing that the woman across from him had feelings for the guy. It was awful.

"Our babysitter is coming over at eight, honey," Torres stated.

"That's great," Hunt responded. "More suction, Avery."

Jackson did as he was told as he casually made eye contact with Cristina across the operating table. Her gaze was downcast and focused on her work but he could tell by her posture that she was uncomfortable.

Luckily, they were just about to close.

He and Cristina scrubbed out alongside of each other and she groaned loudly. "If anyone else mentions Valentine's Day they are going to lose a limb."

Jackson laughed, "I am totally on the same page." His plans for the evening included studying for the Boards with Lexie and ordering takeout. She had invited him to take advantage of her photographic memory and he wasn't about to say no.

She dried her arms off before she turned to him. "Do you want to do something tonight?" She asked after a moment.

Jackson sighed and bit down on his bottom lip. He knew what "something" was and he wanted to…he really wanted to, but what was the point? He wanted April, she wanted Hunt. "We shouldn't."

"Wow," Cristina whistled, "turning down no strings attached sex again? The Virgin Mary has really done a number on you."

"How do you know this is about her?" Jackson answered defensively.

Cristina grinned as she hit him with a towel on her way out of the room. "I'm brilliant, remember," she called over her shoulder.

* * *

April finished her glass of wine as she looked at her phone for the millionth time. She was trying her best to keep her composure but it was slowly crumbling. She had never felt so worthless and insecure in her entire life.

She had spoken to Alex earlier in the day and all of their Valentine's Day plans had been set in stone. Since they were both busy with work today they were going to meet at the restaurant at eight o'clock. He had smiled, kissed her cheek, and told her to wear something nice.

She had showed up on time, but it was now just after nine and Alex was still not here. She kept staring at the door but there was no sign of him. The waiter was starting to take pity on her. He kept refilling her bread basket and asking if she wanted more wine. He was making her feel pathetic, sad, and lonely. Along with her overly attentive waiter, the dozens of happy couples that surrounded her weren't helping either.

She had put more effort into getting ready for this date than she had for any date _ever_, and she was being stood up. She had been so excited…and she just couldn't believe him!

She was actually being stood up on Valentine's Day!

Her self-loathing quickly turned to fury, and there was only one person that she was mad at.

With an angry huff, she left enough money on the table for her wine and a big tip for her nice waiter, and stormed out of the restaurant. She called a cab and cried in the back seat as the driver took her home.

She burst through her front door and heatedly discarded her purse. She ran up the stairs and didn't even notice the two sets of eyes on her.

Jackson turned to Lexie in confusion and she snappily replied, "What are you looking at me for? You should already be up those stairs comforting her."

He jumped to his feet, sending his books to floor, as he realized that she was right. He ran up over the stairs and took a deep, composing breath before he softly knocked on her door.

She promptly opened the door and he could tell that she had been crying. "April, are you okay?"

"No," she muttered.

She didn't say anything else but she opened the door for him so that he could step into the room. He sat down on the edge of her bed and looked up at her in concern while she paced in front of him. "What happened?" He questioned cautiously. She was home from her date a lot earlier than she should be.

"I got stood up," she cried. "On Valentine's Day! I got stood up on Valentine's Day!" She stopped pacing, furiously removed her stiletto heels, and tossed them across the room. "And I wore those stupid uncomfortable shoes! And I bought a new dress! And I spent hours doing my hair and makeup! And it was all wasted because I got stood up!"

Jackson gulped as she finished her rant. Karev was even a bigger idiot than he had initially thought. It should be illegal for her to get stood up in that dress. It was black, short, and strapless. Her hair was pulled up into a fancy up do and she was wearing red lipstick. She looked indescribably gorgeous and ridiculously sexy.

She sighed heavily before she moved to sit next to him on the bed. "I know that he's in surgery," she stated quietly. "I called the hospital and they told me. But still, he didn't even call me himself, or send me a text." Fresh tears pricked her eyes and she brushed them away in frustration. "I'm so stupid. I knew better. I knew better than to get involved with him."

He wrapped his arm around her lower back and she rested her head on his shoulder. "This isn't your fault," he whispered.

"Yes, it is," she whispered back petulantly. "And you saw this coming, admit it. I was essentially his mistress so why would I expect him to treat me any differently now. I never demanded any respect from him."

He shifted away from her so that he could cup her face and force her to look at him. "But you deserve to be treated better and he should know that." He smiled as he gently wiped her tears away with his thumbs. "And you can stay in that dress for a little while longer if you want, so that's it not a waste."

She chuckled, "Thank you, Jackson, but I think that I just want to go to bed."

She slowly got to her feet and walked to her dresser. She pulled the clips out of her hair one by one and her curls slowly tumbled to her shoulders. Jackson watched in fascination but she was unable to see his expression.

"Hey, can you unzip me?" She called over her shoulder.

He shook his head to rid himself of his very inappropriate thoughts. He stood behind her and pushed her hair to one side. One of his hands pinched the zipper at the top of her dress while his other hand rested on her waist. It was the most exquisite torture. His breath hitched when he realized that she wasn't wearing a bra.

Nothing about this was fair.

"You should have gotten Lexie to do this," he joked huskily.

"Come on, Jackson," she giggled, "you're like the perfect gentleman."

"It is becoming increasingly difficult," he admitted.

She giggled again before speaking. "You don't have to do that just because I got stood up. I know that you think of me as a sister. You're like my brother."

"Ouch," he responded automatically as he took a step back from her.

She spun around and held her dress to her chest as she looked at him in a panic. "I didn't mean that in a bad way, not in like the annoying brother way," she attempted to explain. "I just meant that me and you…well…we would never…come on," she laughed. She had no idea why she was talking about the two of them possibly being together but it was as if she couldn't make herself stop talking. "I'm not your type, Jackson," she finished.

"Right," he nodded awkwardly.

He could hear Lexie's voice in his head chirping him, so instead of backing off, like he would normally do, he advanced towards her and stared down at her with a heated gaze. "I definitely don't think of you as a sister, and would you still think of me as a brother if I kissed you like this?" He cupped her jaw as he dipped his head to kiss her. His arm slipped around her waist and pulled her body closer to his as he kissed her passionately. She moaned and fisted her hands in his shirt as he ran his tongue along her bottom lip.

Or at least that's how it happened in his head.

In reality, he just smiled at her as he slowly backed out of her room. "Goodnight April."

"I'm sorry, Jackson," she called out to him regretfully. He had seemed offended by her words. "I didn't mean to bruise your ego. You know that you're incredible."

"You didn't bruise my ego," he laughed. "Relax. I will survive."

She sighed as he left her room. She really needed to get a filter. But she had been right; he had just been saying those things to cheer her up. Jackson was definitely not attracted to her. They had been friends for too long, he had seen her at her very worst.

There was no way that…

She closed her door with a sigh and grabbed an old button-up shirt from her drawer. She slipped it on and prepared for bed.

She had a hard enough time deciphering her feelings for Alex so she had absolutely no idea what her feelings for Jackson were. But she couldn't stop herself from smiling when there was a knock on her door and she opened it to find Jackson standing in her doorway.

"So maybe you did bruise my ego a little bit," he admitted with a playful smile.

She giggled as she grabbed his hand and pulled him inside her room. "Come in and talk to me."

Jackson had returned to her room after encountering Lexie at the bottom of the stairs. She wouldn't allow him to give up so he was following her instructions.

He lay on her bed next to her and waited for her to speak. When she finally did, he was completely taken aback by her topic of conversation.

"I'm jealous of penguins."

"What?" He asked in confusion.

"Penguins," she repeated as she stared up at her ceiling. "Male penguins will search the beach for the perfect pebble to present to their future mate. Is something that romantic too much to ask for from the male gender in humans?" She turned her neck to read his expression and dissolved into laughter at how bewildered he looked. "I'm sorry," she laughed boisterously. "I had a glass of wine while I was waiting at the restaurant; obviously it went to my head."

"No, I see your point, penguins are awesome," he stated with a teasing grin.

She laughed and reached out to smack his arm.

"I don't think your problem is the male gender," he began seriously. "Don't lump us all together." Her problem wasn't men, her problem was Alex Karev.

"I'm sorry," she apologized. "But you're right." He was one of the good guys. He had probably never bailed on a date in his life. "What would you have done if you had had a date tonight?"

"What would I have done?" He pondered quietly to himself. The truth was that if he had gotten a date with April for Valentine's he would have gone all out. "I can be pretty cheesy so I probably would have done candy, flowers, and jewellery. There's always an appropriate time to treat a woman like a princess."

She turned over on her side as she smiled at him. And she had thought that it wasn't possible for him to get any more attractive.

"I would have made reservations at my favourite restaurant in town," he continued. "It's a soft jazz bar, great music, great food, and then we would go for a walk on the pier."

"Please confess your deepest, darkest secret," she laughed, "because you sound more and more like the perfect man every time you speak."

He laughed off her comment and dropped his eyes to the hem of her shirt. He was trying not to stare at her bare, slender legs for too long but it was difficult. "Is that Karev's?" He thought that maybe mentioning her boyfriend would keep him in check.

She was confused for a brief moment until she realized what he was referring to. "Oh, no, college boyfriend," she answered as she pulled on the hem of her shirt. "It's too comfy to throw away. His name was Blaine."

"Blaine?" Jackson repeated with a laugh. "Are you serious?"

She giggled along with him and smacked his arm again. "Stop it! He was a nice guy."

And with that they started to talk about a topic that they had never really breached before: past relationships. Past relationships turned into embarrassing stories and embarrassing stories turned into secrets.

She ended up telling him more about herself than even Meredith knew and she loved talking to him. He made her feel comfortable and cared for, and safe. She felt as if he was actually listening to her, instead of just pretending to listen like some other guys did. She felt...connected to him.

Jackson glanced at his watch as he noticed April's eyes droop. "Shit," he groaned as he sat up. "It's almost two o'clock. I should get going."

She grasped his wrist as he started to move away from her. "This is going to sound a little weird, and maybe a little juvenile," she began timidly. Jackson just smiled at her so she blurted it out. "Will you stay and cuddle?"

She was waiting for him to deny her request but instead he smiled and responded, "Big spoon or little spoon?"

"Little spoon," she giggled as she hopped off of the bed.

She pulled her bedcovers back and slid underneath them while she watched Jackson remove his t-shirt and socks. She had seen him change into his scrubs countless times but this time, for some reason, she was unable to take her eyes off of his torso. He was so wonderfully toned and muscled, and his skin was smooth and such a lovely colour.

Her best guy friend was dangerously beautiful.

She turned onto her side to hide her blushing face but smiled uncontrollably when he slid into bed next to her and slipped his arm around her waist. She and Alex never cuddled, he never wanted to, but it felt so nice. She loved the feeling of his large, warm body wrapped around her own.

"Goodnight Jackson."

He placed a kiss in her hair and smiled happily. "Night April."

* * *

At some point during the night, something stirred Jackson from sleep. He groggily opened his eyes and glanced down at his waist. He was still lying on his side and April was trying to pull his belt out of his jeans. For a brief moment, he thought that he was dreaming but the sensation of her breath on his neck was very real.

"Whatcha doing?" He mumbled sleepily.

"Your belt buckle was digging into my butt," she told him in slight annoyance. "I'm taking it off."

She continued to struggle with his belt and her hands were everywhere. Now this was real torture. He squeezed his eyes shut in frustration and groaned before he finally grabbed her hands. "April," he grunted.

She peered up at him in confusion. "What?"

He supposed that in a few hours he would blame the fact that he was still half-asleep for what he said next. "I'm not your brother. Stop treating me like your brother," he demanded in irritation. "I'm attracted to you and you're practically groping my junk."

Her hazel eyes widened and she unsuccessfully tried to form words to begin an apology. She wasn't sure if it was his body, or his husky voice, or the fact that he had stayed and talked to her for hours because she had been upset, but something made her kiss him. She tilted her head upwards and roughly pressed her lips against his.

When she pulled away for air, panic set in. "Oh my gosh! I shouldn't have done that! I shouldn't—"

He cut her off by grabbing her face and passionately kissing her.

* * *

**A/N: Little bit of a cliffie...but I think that was a solid Japril fix lol.**

**Tell me what you think! :)**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Thanks for all of the reviews! It was clear that you guys enjoyed the Japril development in the last chapter! :)**

**Disclaimer: Same as always.**

* * *

April whimpered as Jackson sucked her bottom lip into his mouth and tangled his hand in her hair. It had been so long since he had kissed someone like this. He wasn't sure if he had even kissed Cristina with this much passion. But it felt unbelievably good to kiss April like this; it felt like he had been waiting forever to do this. He deepened the kiss even further as she slipped one hand around his neck while the other rested on his warm, bare chest.

She whimpered yet again and she could feel him smile against her mouth. She had never been kissed like this before, not even by Alex.

She felt a wave of guilt rush over her. Oh God…Alex…

She had a boyfriend and yet, here she was, sharing her bed with another man…kissing him!

She pulled away from Jackson again and started to scoot towards the edge of her bed. "No, I was right, I shouldn't have done that. I-I have a boyfriend and you…you have a…Cristina."

Jackson instinctually reached for her and wrapped an arm around her waist to pull her body back into his. "Whatever Cristina and I were is dead and done, and I don't think Karev has really earned the title of boyfriend." He dipped his head and placed a kiss on her neck. "We could be so good together."

She shivered as he continued to place kisses down her neck. "And that'd be something that you'd be interested in?" She breathed. "Being with me?"

He raised his head again so that he could smile at her. "Yeah, in case you haven't already noticed." She began to laugh but he cut her off with another intense kiss. "I like you, April," he whispered.

And she liked him too, a lot. He was pretty much her best friend these days. He was smart, and unspeakably attractive, and just a really nice guy. He was sweet and honest, and she knew that he would treat her a million times better than Alex Karev ever could.

But…

He kissed her again and she melted against him. He rolled over onto his back and brought her with him so that she was lying on top of him. His hands grasped her waist and she felt her shirt rise up her thighs. As her fingers traced his neatly trimmed beard she couldn't help but think of how wonderfully unhurried this felt. With Alex it always felt so rushed, like he was trying to get to the finish line as quickly as he could. This felt much better…but she knew that it was wrong.

As good as it felt, she couldn't help but feel relieved when both of their pagers went off.

They sprang apart and out of the bed and got dressed on opposite sides of the room from each other. Jackson gave her a smile and she forced one back as they left her place as quietly as they could. It was still dark outside and Lexie was sound asleep on the sofa.

They took separate cars to the hospital and Jackson had an irrepressible smile on his face, even as he grabbed his trauma gown and walked across the pit to meet Hunt.

"What do we have?" He asked perhaps a little too cheerfully.

"Hotel fire," Hunt answered. "Page plastics and ortho, tell them to be on alert, and be prepared to run triage."

Jackson nodded and steeled himself for the next several hours, which were sure to be busy and hectic.

* * *

April took a break from the madness to grab a much needed cup of coffee. It was her intention to drink the hot beverage as quickly as she could and then return her and Sloan's burn patient that was currently in Trauma Room Three. Unfortunately, her break was interrupted when she was accosted by a breathless Alex Karev.

He opened his mouth to speak but she held up her hand and began to walk away. As she expected, he chased after her. "Don't, Alex," she stated firmly as she continued to head towards the elevator. "I have patients. There's major trauma in the pit, just so you know."

"I was in surgery," he spoke quickly, "and then I went to lie down for just a minute and then I fell asleep, and then I didn't wake up until my pager went off, and you've been really busy with the burn victims in the pit, and I tried calling you but you're phone's dead or something. I am so _so _sorry. I'm an idiot."

She stepped into the elevator as she continued to listen to him talk rapidly.

"I'll make it up to you. I promise. We can do something really nice tonight, or tomorrow night, whenever you want."

He really hadn't intended to ditch her on Valentine's Day. Ellis had asked him to scrub in on a lacerated liver that had come into the pit and he hadn't been able to turn her down. She hadn't even spoken to him since his breakup with Meredith and all of a sudden, she had asked him to scrub in. In his excitement he had sort of forgotten about his plans with April and then he had accidentally fallen asleep.

She turned to him and blurted out what she couldn't seem to stop thinking about. "I kissed Jackson."

His eyes widened in shock. That was the very last thing that he expected her to say. "You what?" He questioned.

"I was really upset when you stood me up," she explained. "I went back to my place and Jackson was there with Lexie. He came up to talk to me, I asked him to stay, and I kissed him."

The story was actually much more complicated than that and in order to tell it properly she would probably have to go back all the way to their intern year, but it was the simplified version. It covered all of the important facts. Also, she was willing to take responsibility for her actions. Jackson had confessed his feelings for her first, but she had kissed him. It was possible that nothing would have happened if she hadn't made the first move.

She obviously wasn't very good at reading signals because she never would have imagined that Jackson liked her. She had no idea why that perfect man wanted her.

Alex thoughtfully stared at his feet for a minute before he placed his hands on his hips and asked, "Did you do it to get back at me or for some other reason?"

"I don't know," she answered honestly.

She was so confused and she was so mad at herself because she couldn't seem to do anything right. She had betrayed her best friend by fooling around with her fiancé and now she had betrayed her boyfriend by kissing her friend. What was wrong with her?

Alex could tell that she was conflicted and lost in thought. He exhaled heavily before he grabbed the cup of coffee out of her hand and roughly pushed her against the elevator wall. He kissed her hungrily and after a brief moment, she responded to him and threaded her fingers through his hair. This kiss reminded her of the kisses that they had shared when they had been having their sordid affair. It was urgent and insistent and purely physical. But something about it was different. This kiss was more desperate. There was more need.

He knew that his feelings for Meredith were still strong; he knew that he wanted her back, but the possibility of losing April had made his heart clench. He didn't want to be alone. She was the only person that had any faith in him. She was the only person that believed in him and he wasn't strong enough right now to lose her.

"Don't…don't leave me," he murmured against her mouth. "You're all I have. I don't have anybody else."

April's expression softened and her body relaxed. She had thought that he was trying to seduce her, to manipulate her, but she could see tears shining in his eyes and his voice broke on every word. He seemed so damaged…so broken. She had never seen this side of him before and she found it very relatable. He was really letting his guard down for her; it was a big step for him, and a big step for their relationship.

"There's a reason why we did what we did, right?" She whispered with a small smile as she held his face.

He nodded as he recognized his own words. He had said the very same thing to her. He kissed her again before he pulled back and discreetly wiped his eyes. The elevator had stopped and the doors would be opening any second.

The doors slid open and he handed her her cup of coffee before she stepped out. She turned around and offered him a sweet smile. "I will call you later tonight, okay?"

He nodded and smiled back at her. "Okay. Good luck with your patients."

When the elevator doors closed again, he leaned back against the wall and breathed a sigh of relief.

* * *

After a very long day, Jackson knocked on April's door with a hopeful smile. He had kept his head in the game all day while he had been in the pit but whenever he had had a spare moment, he had been thinking of her.

The door opened and he could tell that she had just gotten out of the shower. She was wearing a pair of shorts, an old t-shirt from Mercy West, and her wet hair was down.

"Hey," April breathed as she rested her head on the door.

"Hi," he smiled. He could tell just by looking at her that she was feeling as exhausted as he was. "I just finished up with the last of my patients and heard that you had already gone home so I decided to drop by. Can I come in?" He asked softly.

She nodded and pushed the door open for him. She walked into the living room and he followed her after closing the door behind him.

"Where is Lexie?" He asked curiously as he looked around the empty living room.

"She's at a meeting. She just joined a group."

He smiled brightly. "That's great." He was a little surprised that she hadn't told him but maybe she just didn't want him to pressure her, or to be disappointed if it didn't work out. "So," he began as he took a step towards her. "It's just me and you?"

She grabbed his outstretched hands and held him at arms' length. "We need to talk."

His smile instantly faded due to her solemn tone. "That doesn't sound good."

"I-I'm sorry," she stuttered. "It's not you, it's definitely not you! You're perfect."

He rolled his eyes and turned around so that he didn't have to look at her while she rattled off excuses. "Right."

"Jackson," she sighed as she stepped up to him and placed her hands on his back. "It's just that we're…we're so good as friends. I love being your friend and it's just…that…I…"

He fell back onto the sofa and groaned. "What exactly are you trying to say to me, April?" It had been a very long day and his fuse was shorter than usual.

She ran a hand through her hair and sighed in frustration before she sat down next to him. "We can't date," she whispered. "You're way too good for me, I'll ruin you."

He turned his neck to face her and stated seriously, "You have a very distorted view of yourself."

She bit down on her bottom lip and blinked back tears. It was things like that that made it so hard for her to turn him down. Alex never said things like that to her.

After a moment, he spoke again, so quietly that she could barely hear him. "So, what? Karev gets you because you don't think you deserve any better? That's pretty self-destructive."

"I just…I," she spoke again disjunctively before she took a deep breath. "I was raised to believe that God has a plan. That everything happens for a reason, and there needs to be some bigger reason why I betrayed my best friend to be with Alex. I need to see if something good comes out of this. It may be wrong but it's right for _right now_," she stated firmly.

Jackson furrowed his brow before he replied in an irritated tone. "So if everything happens for a reason, why did you kiss me? I'm just using your own logic against you," he quipped cheekily.

She groaned his name loudly and smacked his arm. "Why are you doing this? Why are you making this harder than it has to be?"

"I'm not making this harder than it has to be," he argued. "This _is_ hard."

They sat next to each other in silence until Jackson slowly got to his feet. He had played sports his whole life, he was able to recognize when he had lost. He didn't have a play. There was definitely something to be said about people accepting what they thought they deserved without a second thought. He just genuinely believed that April deserved better, she _was_ better. She wanted a good guy, but she just wouldn't let herself have one.

He had always told himself that he would walk away if she picked another guy, and she had, so he was walking away. He was a big boy, he could handle it.

"Bye April," he whispered. She grabbed his hand and he reluctantly looked down at her. She was on the verge of tears and he hated seeing her that way. "What?" He asked in exasperation.

"Can we…can we still be friends? Please," she begged.

If she pulled him back in, he would come willingly, he knew that he would, and so he hoped that she wouldn't do that. He wanted to say no, he was willing himself to form the word, but he couldn't. He was clearly a masochist because he still wanted to have her in his life and spend time with her, and be close to her…

"Of course we can," he answered before he sat back down on her sofa.

* * *

**A/N: *Runs and hides under blanket* Don't freak out, April and Jackson have quite the journey to take in this fic. Please leave me a review! Even if it's just to yell at me lol.**

**Next chapter: There will be a little bit of a time jump and it's time for Catherine Avery and another special guest! :)**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews! A special thank you to everyone who commented that they have faith that I will give April and Jackson a happy ending :)**

**A special note: This fic is based on the AU world of 8x13, it is therefore, in no way, a reflection of Jackson and April's relationship currently on the show, or even a reflection of what I think about April's character. April is very different in AU world, much like how Meredith is different and Alex is different, etc. I can understand the April hate in the last chapter but there is a reason why she is the way that she is and that is explored in this chapter. So hopefully, everything will make sense once you get to the end of this one.**

**Enjoy :)**

**Disclaimer: Same as always.**

* * *

February ended and the beginning of March passed quickly. Callie Torres was named the new Chief of Surgery and so far the hospital was flourishing under her leadership. Her first two moves as Chief had been gutsy but they had proven to be smart decisions. She had stopped the absorption of Seattle Presbyterian and had rehired Mandy Bailey. The general surgeon had come back stronger and better than ever. Dr. Bailey was no longer the timid pushover that Ellis Grey had fired; she was fierce and determined and exerted her authority the way that she was supposed to. It was refreshing and she was a pleasure to work with.

It was clear that Callie was enjoying her new role but she was struggling to find a new Head of Cardio and her relationship with her husband was strained. The big "D" word was floating around the hospital but nobody new for certain if those rumors were true or not.

Derek Shepherd was getting ready to start a clinical trial to find a cure for Alzheimer's and his friendship with Mark Sloan was on the mend. All that it had taken was a lifesaving move by the plastic surgeon in one of Derek's surgeries for him to begin to gain a little bit of respect back for the man that he used to call his best friend. Also, Mark had kept his word about April Kepner. He really had no interest in sleeping with her. But things had started to become tense again when Addison's due date had approached. Mark took time off and flew down to Los Angeles to witness the birth of his child and Derek tried his best to pretend that he wasn't jealous. After all, he had believed that the child had been his for a long time. In his eyes, he was supposed to have a family by now.

The fifth year residents were engrossed in studying for the Boards and padding their OR outcomes. Soon they would be going on interviews to various hospitals; Arizona had already started to interview prospective peds fellows.

Cristina was learning to become part of a group and share things with her peers, Meredith was still happy with Derek, things in general were looking up for Alex, and Charles was just trying to stay afloat in neuro.

Things between April and Jackson were…complicated. They were still friends and they still spent time together but there was a very apparent wall between them. They had drawn lines in the sand that were not okay to cross and the most difficult aspect of it was that they both had the desire to cross the lines and break down the wall. Jackson absolutely detested seeing her with Alex; even sharing the elevator with them turned his stomach. He spent a lot of time running and playing basketball with Charles to work out his frustrations and occupy his time. April, on the other hand, kept telling herself that she was happy with Alex, that it was the right thing to do, but she couldn't help but feel jealous when she watched Jackson flirt with the cute, blonde paramedic named Clare. She had no reason to feel possessive, but she did.

Lexie had picked up on the red-head's moods and it was so easy to tell that she wanted Jackson when he was hanging around their place. She had spent so much on her own, fending for herself, that she had gotten very good at reading people, and April Kepner and Jackson Avery were like open books. They wanted each other and the sexual tension was annoying as hell.

And so Lexie couldn't help but groan loudly as she watched April get ready for another date with Alex.

"Why are you doing this again?" Lexie questioned as she lounged on April's bed.

They had finally found their common ground: bad reality television, and as a result, they had been talking a lot more. They were starting to become friends, sort of. Lexie figured that it was only a matter of time before she told April who she really was.

April turned around to face Lexie and frowned. "What? I like these earrings."

Lexie rolled her eyes. "I'm not talking about the earrings and you know it. Why are you still dating the nerd?"

"Lexie," April sighed. "You don't get it and that's fine. You don't have to. I know what I'm doing."

"Do you want to have sex with him?" She asked bluntly. "Because you want to have sex with Jackson."

April's eyes widened in horror and she was quick to retort. "This isn't about sex."

"Maybe it should be," Lexie muttered. She knew that April was a virgin, she had virgin written all over her, but she could tell that the red-head was dying to let loose. She just didn't seem to want to get down and dirty with her boyfriend. "You tiptoe around Alex like you're afraid of what he'll do and say next, but you light up when Jackson's around."

"I do not!" April argued passionately.

Lexie shouted back like an annoying younger sibling. "Yes, you do!"

April huffed in frustration before she grabbed her purse and began to walk out of the room. "I'm going to go out with my _boyfriend _now. Don't wait up!"

"Okay," Lexie yelled back. "Jackson is coming over tonight!"

April sighed as she galloped down over the stairs. She figured that Lexie was just trying to goad a response out of her, so she jumped back in surprise when she opened the door to find Jackson on her doorstep.

"Oh…hi…"

"Hey, April," he smiled weakly. "You look nice." She was wearing a pair of black jeans and a nice top but to him she would look gorgeous in a paper bag.

"Thanks," she whispered. She continued to stare at him until she laughed awkwardly. "Where are my manners? Come in!" She opened the door for him and turned around so that she could call up the stairs. "Lexie, Jackson is here!" She glanced down at the bag of takeout in his hand and inquired, "Are you studying tonight?"

Jackson shook his head. "Nope, just hanging out. Are you going out with Alex?"

She nodded meekly. "Yeah, yeah, I am."

"Well that's great, have fun," he forced out.

Jackson shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans as he smiled at her. She seemed a little perturbed by his reaction and he wasn't sure how to feel about that. She knew how he felt about her and she had picked another guy. It was going to take some changes and a big gesture on her part to shift the status quo. She had asked for his friendship and that's what he was giving her. He wasn't about to give her anything else anytime soon. That's what he firmly told himself anyway, but he knew that he was a little weaker than he should be when it came to her.

April placed her hand on the doorknob again and started to slip out of her apartment. "Have a good night," she told him half-heartedly.

Jackson closed his eyes and sighed as the door closed behind April.

"No, don't do that," a voice called from behind him. "Don't be all mopey."

He spun around and faced Lexie with a mixture of happiness and annoyance. "I am not moping. I'm pining," he corrected. "There is a difference."

Lexie passed him on the way to the living room. "Either way it's pathetic," she chuckled.

"Oh trust me, I'm aware."

He followed her into the living room and sat down on the couch. He laid the bag of takeout on the coffee table in front of him. He was trying to focus on work, and working out, and he was even developing a budding relationship with a cute paramedic. But he couldn't stop thinking about April Kepner. If he didn't care about her so much he would hate her. He would hate her for what she was doing to him.

"Who broke her?" Lexie asked casually as she sat down beside him.

Jackson furrowed his brow in confusion and stopped unpacking the bag of food that he had brought. "What do you mean?"

Lexie scoffed, "Come on, Jackson. I know that you were raised with a silver spoon but surely you realize that not every family is as perfect as the Averys." He continued to stare at her in bewilderment and she sighed. "Someone damaged her. When someone damaged me, I turned to drugs, maybe April turned to medicine." She shrugged before she added, "I just know that you don't think that little of yourself for no reason. You have to take responsibility for your own actions but there's always a reason."

"Did you talk about that in group?" Jackson asked curiously.

"Yup," Lexie admitted rather proudly.

* * *

Mark strode into the skills lab and pleasantly greeted his favourite student. "Good morning, Kepner!"

"Hi, Dr. Sloan," she murmured glumly.

Mark frowned as he sat down on the stool next to her. "What's wrong?" He asked curiously. She was typically much perkier than that.

April laid her instruments down and removed her surgical glasses before she turned to her mentor. "I'm starting to regret a decision I made a little while ago," she confessed.

"You're not regretting picking plastics over peds, are you?" He inquired worriedly.

"No! No! Definitely not," she assured him swiftly. She loved plastics! She had gotten to do a face transplant; it didn't get much cooler than that! "It's just that I…I…" She stopped talking and blushed. "Its personal, I really shouldn't be talking to you about this."

Mark grinned. "Kepner, I told you about me and Derek. I sent you a picture of my kid," he chuckled. "I think that we're past that."

April laughed softly as she nodded. That was certainly true. They had a different student-teacher relationship than anyone else in the hospital.

"Is it boy drama?" The attending probed gleefully. "Because I can probably offer some insight if its boy drama."

"It is boy drama," she giggled.

Not too long ago, she had lead Jackson on. It had taken her a while to realize it but that's exactly what she had been doing. Now she felt like she was leading Alex on because all during their date last night, she hadn't been able to stop thinking about Jackson. He was on her mind all the time and he made her happy. The majority of the time that she was with Alex, she wasn't happy and she knew that he wasn't either. It was like they were acting in this carefully written play; they were going through the motions.

Lexie was right, she tiptoed around her boyfriend.

"Well my advice to you, Kepner, is to be with the one person you think about all the time, the one who thinks about you too," he spoke sincerely. "I wish that I was all someone thought about."

April tilted her head and smiled at him thankfully. He could be really sweet when he wanted to be. People unfairly gave him a really hard time. He had a really good heart. "Thanks Dr. Sloan."

"No problem," he smiled. "Hey, did you hear that Christopher Avery is in the hospital?"

April's mouth dropped open in shock. Jackson hadn't mentioned that to her. "No, I didn't know that."

"He's probably going to be looking for residents to scrub in with him." Kepner slid off of her stool and he encouragingly smacked her behind. "Go get 'em!" She looked at him over her shoulder and he grimaced at her uncomfortable expression. "That falls under that sexual harassment talk you gave me, doesn't it?" He asked sheepishly.

"Definitely," she responded quickly.

He held his hands up apologetically. "Sorry! I've never taught a female resident that I wasn't also sleeping with. I'm trying here!"

She couldn't stop herself from laughing as she walked towards the doors. "I'll see you later, Dr. Sloan."

* * *

"Jackie!"

Jackson spun around with a smile as he recognized a familiar voice address him by his childhood nickname. "Dad!" He grinned widely. He laid his chart down on the nurses' station and strode towards his father.

Christopher Avery embraced his only child and happily patted his back. "How are you?"

"I'm great, how are you? Where's Mom?"

His father rolled his eyes playfully. "Your mother is in a meeting at Seattle Pres. That hospital might become the Harper Avery Foundation's newest investment."

"And that was all Mom's idea, I assume?" Jackson asked with a laugh. His father loved surgery, he could operate all day long and be content, his mother was the one who wanted to take over the world. She made all of the business decisions.

"Absolutely," Christopher chuckled. He wrapped his arm around his son's shoulders and began to guide him down the hallway. "So, how is everything? Trauma? Boards prep? Tell me everything," he prompted excitedly.

Jackson smiled as he began to answer his father's questions. Sometimes it was a little stressful, but, overall, he always loved when his parents came to town for work. He and his father had always been able to talk about everything and his father was the one who had stood up to his grandfather when he had decided to specialize in trauma. His father knew all about standing up to Harper and dealing with the pressure that the surgical world put on Averys, but his father had turned out just fine, and he was confident that he would to.

When he saw his mother, she would immediately start asking questions about his love life so he was glad that he could talk to his father about work and everything else.

"So, you're helping Dr. Torres with a piggyback transplant?" Jackson questioned. He knew that his father was here for a surgery that was scheduled for tomorrow but he hadn't asked for details until now.

Christopher nodded. "Yeah, its delicate, I treated the patient years ago, and Ellis called me in for a favour. It should be fun," he smiled widely. "Any cardio residents worth talking about?"

"Cristina Yang is brilliant," Jackson answered honestly. "She'll impress you."

"I'll see you later, son," he announced with a smile. He had to leave to meet Chief Torres and talk to their patient. "Your mother told me to tell you that she'll definitely be here for lunch."

* * *

His father had been right; his mother had made it to Seattle Grace in time to have lunch with him. She was content to eat in the cafeteria, probably because she could observe everyone around them and his reactions to them. He tried to talk to her about her meeting and the Foundation, but she only wanted to discuss one thing.

"So, baby," she began as she pushed her fork through her salad. "Are you seeing anyone?"

"No, Mom," he answered with a sigh.

"Any prospects?" She pushed.

He shook his head. "Nope." He certainly wasn't going to tell her about his regular flirting with Clare the paramedic, and April was off limits. "I'm focusing on my Boards right now, and getting ready for interviews."

Catherine smiled lovingly. "Your career is going to be fine, baby. You're smart, you're talented, and you're disciplined. I'm not worried about your career; any hospital is going to be lucky to get you. I'm worried about your heart."

Jackson opened his mouth to respond but a familiar figure caught his attention. April had just entered the cafeteria with Meredith and his eyes followed her across the room.

His mother noticed that he was distracted and she smiled knowingly. She looked over her shoulder and spotted who he was staring at. "Who's the red-head?"

"Um, that's April," he coughed. "We were interns together at Mercy West."

Catherine nodded. "Yes, I remember her. She looks very different now." She continued to watch her son watch the red-head and she wasn't sure if she had ever seen a woman capture his attention like that. "How long have you been in love with her?"

Jackson coughed and spluttered as he felt a bite of his sandwich go down the wrong way. "What?" He finally choked out.

Catherine simply continued to smile at him. "You're in love with her," she stated matter-of-factly. "I'm just wondering for how long."

Jackson looked down at the tabletop and scratched his head. He had never been very good at hiding things from his mother. "A while, I guess," he confessed shyly.

"And does she know?"

He shook his head. "No, she's…it's complicated."

"Simplify it," she encouraged with a grin. She reached forward and patted his hand comfortingly. "Love is always complicated, but it's worth it, just look at me and your father."

Jackson nodded with a smile. His parents were so happy together, and that's what he wanted…and he wanted it with April.

* * *

April stumbled to her front door because the incessant knocking would not go away. She looked into the living room and saw Lexie slowly get up off of the couch with a blanket still wrapped tightly around her.

"It's definitely one of your boyfriends," she muttered grouchily. "I'm going to your room."

April merely nodded and waved her hand towards the staircase before she opened her front door. She wasn't surprised to see Jackson but she was confused about what he could possibly want to say to her. And she didn't think she was ready to talk to him. She wasn't ready to tell him that he was all that she thought about.

"What are you doing here?" She asked sleepily.

He stared at her with the saddest expression before he spoke. "Who hurt you? Who made you think so little of yourself?"

She grimaced and took a step back without even realizing it. But that small action allowed him to step inside of her home so that she couldn't escape his questions.

"Jackson," she pleaded. "I don't…I…I don't know what you're talking about," she lied.

He stared at her intensely as he reached out and gently took her hands. "Just tell me, please," he whispered. "I want to know. I need to know." He loved her and he needed to know what was keeping her from letting herself be with him. He was combining the things that Lexie and his mother had told him. He needed to know who broke her so that he could simplify things between them.

She sighed before she peered up at him. He looked so sincere and so concerned, and she knew that if anyone deserved to hear this story, it was him.

"When I was a sophomore in college, my older sister Libby died in a car accident. She was hit by a drunk driver. Libby was perfect in every way and her death really tore my parents apart. That's when I decided to become a surgeon," she sighed, "but it didn't matter, it's never really mattered, my parents, especially my father, take every opportunity that they can to remind me that I will never be Libby. I was never as good as Libby."

As he listened to her, everything fell into place for him. Everything made so much more sense to him now, why she was with Karev, why she had decided to specialize in plastics, her feelings about God, even her decision to abstain from alcohol for as long as she had. And he could only imagine how she felt, when the people who were supposed to love you the most constantly told you that you weren't good enough…no wonder she had difficulty believing that she deserved good things.

He moved his hands up to her shoulders and began to rub them soothingly. "How come you never told me?" He asked quietly.

"I don't tell anyone," she replied honestly. "I've never told Meredith. I've never told Reed. It's not something I talk about."

"Well, I'm sorry," he whispered tenderly.

She smiled up at him. "Thank you, Jackson." He didn't say anything else and she could feel the change in the air between them. She cleared her throat before she stepped out of his hold. "You should probably go now."

She didn't want to toy with him anymore. She needed to have a conversation with Alex first, and then she would decide what she wanted from Jackson…what she wanted _with_ Jackson. She knew that she was screwed up and she really didn't want to drag him into that.

"Yeah, I probably should," he breathed.

There were so many things left unsaid as Jackson reluctantly reached for the doorknob. "So, I'm going to walk away now," he told her slowly.

Even though he said that he was going to leave, he remained still and continued to stare at her with those gorgeous eyes of his. "You have to stop looking at me like that," she demanded tearfully.

"Like what?" He asked her with a small, smug grin.

"Like you can give me everything I've ever wanted."

"I can," he responded firmly. He had no doubt that he could give her everything, he wanted to give her everything.

April sighed disbelievingly, "Don't say that if you don't mean it."

"I mean it," he smiled. "I really mean it."

* * *

**A/N: In a world where Ellis Grey isn't sick, I figured that it would be interesting to give Jackson a father that didn't burn out and leave him. Hence, the happy Avery family. I hope that you enjoyed that twist. Christopher and Catherine will be in the next chapter as well.**

**Please leave a review! :)**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews! I've been listening to a lot of Florence and the Machine lately and I've decided that "Shake It Out" is a pretty good song for April in this fic. Enjoy the update! :)**

**Disclaimer: Same as always.**

* * *

When April awoke, she was comfortably nestled in the crook of Jackson's arm with her head resting against his chest. She remembered that they had sat on her sofa and talked for hours but she couldn't remember falling asleep. She sat up and her movements woke her companion. His eyes fluttered open and he stretched his arms above his head.

"I'm sorry for waking you," she muttered with a soft, embarrassed smile. "And sleeping on top of you."

"S'okay," he smiled. "I don't mind." He reached out and tucked her hair behind her ears. "Did you sleep okay?"

After divulging her biggest secret, she had cried a lot last night so maybe that's why she couldn't remember falling asleep, but she felt well rested. "Yeah, I did. I like being around you, Jackson," she whispered. "You make me feel better."

He smiled widely and opened his mouth to say _it_, he was going to tell her that he loved her, but the moment was ruined by a knock on the front door.

She smiled at him softly before she got up off of the couch and walked to her door.

"Alex, hey! What are you doing here?" She asked her unexpected guest.

He simply grinned at her as he stepped inside her apartment and wrapped his arms around her waist. "Do I need a reason to come over and see my girlfriend?" He leaned down and placed a quick kiss on her lips. "Want to grab some breakfast before we go to the hospital?"

She opened her mouth to answer but his gaze shifted and she knew that he had spotted the man sitting on her couch.

"Avery," he greeted coldly. His dislike for his fellow resident had only intensified since learning that April had kissed him.

"Hey," Jackson replied as he stood up and smoothed out his clothes. "I was just leaving. See ya April."

"Bye," she replied quietly. And he gave her one last meaningful glance before he slipped out the door.

"What was he doing here?" Alex asked immediately after he heard the door close.

April blurted out the first thing that came to her mind. "He's my friend, we spend time together."

It was way too early in the morning for visitors and all that she was wearing was a tank top and a pair of boxer shorts. "Do you spend a lot of time together at this hour? When you're half naked?" He shot accusingly.

She stepped out of his arms and raised both of her eyebrows. "Excuse me? What exactly are you trying to say?"

"I don't like you spending time with him, okay?" He confessed angrily. "It's like you're more comfortable with him than you are with me. I bet you'd give it up for him. Who's to say you haven't already?" He continued heatedly. "You've lied and snuck around before."

She bit down on her bottom lip and fought an incoming barrage of tears with fierce determination. She had never seen him so furious, and icy. "Get out of my apartment right now."

She wasn't sure what hurt more, the fact that he had said those things or that they were true.

"Gladly," he snarled. "I am so through with you! Slut!" He flung the door open and quickly slammed it behind him.

April placed a hand over her mouth to contain her sobs as she slowly sank to the floor.

After a few minutes, she was startled to feel two hands help her to her feet. She had completely forgotten that another person lived here now.

"Hey, come on," Lexie whispered in a rather sweet voice. "He's an asshole. Don't waste your tears on him."

* * *

Mark sat in the skills lab with Arizona as they drank their morning coffee. It was a quiet place to hang out and far less crowded than the attendings' lounge.

"So how are your interviews going?" He inquired. "Any front runners?"

"There are some interesting prospects," the peds doctor answered vaguely.

"Why are you doing fellowship interviews so early anyway?" He questioned with a look of confusion.

His blonde friend grinned at him. "Because peds is hardcore."

Mark rolled his eyes and was about to offer a witty comeback when the door to the skills lab opened. Callie Torres stood in the doorway, impeccably dressed and every strand of hair perfectly in place as always, and he gave the new Chief of Surgery his attention. "Can I help you with something, Dr. Torres?"

"Yes, um, I need to pull Kepner from your service today. Dr. Avery requested her for our piggyback transplant."

Mark smiled happily. This was a great opportunity for his girl; it would look good on her Boards. "That's fine, as long as she's back to me tomorrow."

Callie just stared at them for an uncomfortably long time before she nodded. "Alright then, thanks Dr. Sloan. Dr. Robbins," she acknowledged quietly before exiting.

Mark quickly turned to Arizona and raised a suspicious eyebrow. "Was there some sexual tension there between you two or was it just me?"

"Shut it, Mark," was her quick reply.

He laughed triumphantly as she slipped off of her stool and headed towards the door. "So I'm right, there totally was!"

"Shut it, Mark," Arizona repeated firmly as she left the lab.

* * *

April was incredibly confused and slightly flustered when Chief Torres told her that she would be scrubbing in with her and Christopher Avery. The request came completely out of left field and after the morning that she had had, she wasn't exactly in the mood to assist in a difficult, high-profile surgery. But she kept telling herself that it was good for her career.

At least she had Cristina Yang to keep her in check. They may not be close but she knew that the harsh woman wouldn't hesitate to tell her to suck it up, and that was exactly what she needed.

Unfortunately, their surgery was about to begin in fifteen minutes and Cristina was nowhere to be found. She was never late and she was always easy to find. Her absence was a little unsettling.

Callie, who didn't want to worry Dr. Avery or tip off the members of the press that were watching in the OR gallery, discreetly whispered to April. "Find Yang. _Now_."

April didn't have the slightest idea where Cristina could be hiding so she sought out Meredith. She stepped into OR 2 with a surgical mask held to her mouth.

"Dr. Shepherd," she began politely. "Can I speak with Dr. Webber for a moment?"

"This is a very delicate procedure, Dr. Kepner," the neurosurgeon replied in annoyance.

"I know, I'm sorry, sir, but it's important."

Derek gave Meredith a slight nod and she laid her instruments down on a tray before walking up to April. "What's going on?" She asked quietly.

"We can't find Cristina and we're about to operate," April whispered frantically.

Meredith thought for a moment before she responded. "Try the vents, sometimes she goes there to think."

April was incredibly confused but she nodded in thanks before she ran out of the room and towards the nearest stairwell. She thought the vents was a very weird hiding spot, she would have gone the more scenic route, something like the helicopter pad, but sure enough, that's where she found Cristina Yang. She was standing on the large air duct and she looked like she was in a trance.

"Cristina," April called softly. The other woman didn't move a muscle so April stepped into the room and closed the door behind her. "Cristina, we have surgery."

"He's talking about getting a divorce," she began in a monotone voice. "And I want to be with him, I do, but he has kids. He has three kids and I don't want to be a stepmother. I don't want kids."

April's brow furrowed in confusion as she stepped forward and stood in front of Cristina so that they were face to face. "You and Dr. Hunt?" She whispered. She wasn't certain but there was no one else that Cristina could be referring to.

Cristina nodded and sighed. "Yeah, me and Owen."

April smiled a little to herself. She couldn't believe that Cristina Yang, of all people, was confiding in her, so she decided to reciprocate. "Alex called me a slut this morning because I won't sleep with him."

"What a douche," Cristina responded seriously.

"I know," April laughed incredulously.

After a moment, Cristina spoke again in the same serious, deadpanned voice. "You should be with Avery, he's crazy about you."

April smiled. "I know he is, and I'm crazy about him too. Are you crazy about Owen?" Cristina nodded and April echoed Meredith's words. "You can't help who you fall in love with."

Cristina seemed to absorb what she had said and so after another minute of silence, April spoke softly. "Are you ready to go operate? We're doing a piggyback."

"Just wait a minute," she whispered.

April opened her mouth to speak but was silenced by the blast of air that hit her from below. A laugh slipped out of her and she noticed Cristina smile.

"It's great isn't it?" The normally serious woman asked excitedly. "It clears your head. Anything can happen on the vent." She and Owen had kissed for the first time right here. She smiled wryly, "Like me and you having a real conversation."

"Yeah," April agreed with a chuckle. "Apparently anything can happen on the vent."

The air died down and Cristina took a deep breath. "Okay, now let's go operate."

* * *

Cristina walked into that operating room like it was a normal day and a routine procedure, and April had to admire that. She was very strong and very self-aware. April wished that she was more like that.

Their transplant went off without a hitch and afterwards they took a few photos for the press. Jackson's Dad was a great surgeon to work with and he seemed like a really nice guy. She could see where Jackson learned to be such a good man.

April was on her way to the residents' locker room when she felt someone grab her elbow and steer her in the opposite direction.

"Hi, honey, April, right? I'm—"

April smiled in disbelief as she looked at the woman next to her. "You're Catherine Avery, I know, I'm a big fan of yours. I met you briefly when I was an intern at Mercy West."

Catherine essentially ignored her. "That's all great, dear. We need to talk about my baby boy."

April gulped as the legendary urologist continued to lead her down the hallway. "Um, what about Jackson?"

Catherine stopped walking and turned to face the red-head. "Do you care for him? Do you love him? Are you going to hurt him?" She could tell by the expression on the young woman's face that she had startled her with her rapid fire questions but she had always been fiercely protective of her only child.

"I don't want to hurt him," April finally sighed. "I'm trying not to." Catherine arched a perfectly sculpted eyebrow and she felt the strongest urge to run and hide under her intense gaze. "I do really care about him though."

"He's an exceptional man," Catherine stated matter-of-factly.

April nodded vigorously. "I know he is." She was more than aware, he wanted to give her everything. "He's so unbelievable."

"Be careful," Catherine warned. "He's more fragile than he appears. I can already tell that he would do things for you that he's never done for a girl before."

April nervously chewed on her bottom lip. "Well I don't know about that."

Catherine smiled knowingly. "Honey, trust me."

* * *

Alex laughed humorlessly as he spotted Avery swiftly approaching him from the other end of the hallway. He was having the shittiest day and Jackson Avery was one of the reasons why. "Dude, you are seriously the last person that I want to see. And you can have her, she's a tease."

Jackson didn't reply but he curled his fist, pulled his hand back, and punched the Chief Resident in the face as hard as he could. Karev hit the floor like a sack of bricks and he heard the personnel that were in the immediate area gasp in shock.

An Avery was fighting in a hospital, that wasn't something that happened every day.

Alex jumped to his feet, tossed aside his broken glasses, and charged at Avery. He was willing to bet that he had way more experience in these matters than the pretty boy.

They tussled on the floor until two people pulled them apart. Mark Sloan held Jackson back while Alex was contained by Derek Shepherd.

"What is going on here?" The neurosurgeon asked in an authoritative voice.

"Avery attacked me!" Alex yelled as he gestured wildly towards the other resident.

"He deserved it!" Jackson spat.

Mark started to pull Jackson down the hallway as he exchanged a knowing look with Derek. "I have a feeling this is about a woman," he stated perceptively.

Jackson simply huffed and straightened out his scrubs once the attending let him go.

Mark pushed the resident into the nearest exam door and tossed him a pack of ice. "Here, ice your hand. Hunt will be pissed if you can't operate tomorrow."

Jackson sat on the exam table and iced his hand while the plastic surgeon left without another word. He angrily muttered to himself until the door to the exam room reopened. He expected to see Sloan, but instead April rushed towards him. She placed one hand on his face while the other gently inspected his hand.

"I don't think anything is broken," he told her in a strained voice.

"Dr. Sloan told me that you and Alex got in a fight?" She questioned for clarification. "What happened? You're not really the fighting kind of guy."

He flexed his hand with a groan before he responded. "I was in surgery all day and I just read this text from Lexie that was on my phone, and I just lost it." He had seen red and all that he had been able to do was seek out Karev so that he could kick his ass. "He should never have said that to you…and I just really hate that guy," he finished with a chuckle.

She took him by surprise when she cupped the back of his neck and pressed her lips to his. She ended the kiss quickly but kept her mouth close to his and their noses brushed together. She tenderly caressed his jaw and cheek before she spoke softly. "I love you…I think," she corrected in a panic. "I've never been in love before so I don't know for sure, but I can't stop thinking about you, and I—"

He cut off her rambling with a kiss and grasped her waist with his good hand. "Just shut up, April," he grinned playfully.

"Sorry," she giggled. "I told you that I'm not good at these things."

"It's okay," he whispered. "I love you too."

Her beautiful smile lit up her entire face. "Really?" She asked a tad girlishly.

"Yeah," he smiled. "You just have to let me." He kissed her lips again before he moved his mouth to her devastatingly adorable dimple. She giggled as he peppered kisses on her cheek and he wasn't sure if he had ever heard a nicer sound. "Can I come over tonight?"

"Yes, and please bring something alcoholic. It's been a _long_ day."

* * *

Later that evening, Jackson showed up at her door with a pizza and a six pack. "I brought beer," he announced with a smile.

"Great," she smiled back as she grabbed his wrist and pulled him inside. "Lexie is at group and she just got a job at this cool bookstore slash café, so she'll be there for the night."

She bit down on her bottom lip as she looked him up and down. He looked so good in his favourite grey sweater and a black pair of jeans. She should probably feel awful about jumping into a relationship with another guy so quickly, but she didn't. This was different, this was Jackson. She loved him.

Jackson laid the beer and the pizza box on her coffee table and glanced upwards to catch her staring at him. "What?" He inquired with a smile.

Color filled her cheeks as she tucked her hair behind her ear. "Nothing, nothing." She murmured before she fled to the kitchen.

A slightly confused Jackson followed April into her kitchen. "What are you looking for?" He questioned as he watched her open a few cabinets.

"I can never resist buying chocolate but I always hide it away so that I don't binge eat when I feel bad about myself, so now I'm trying to remember where I hid it last," she explained. "I'm in the mood for chocolate."

"It probably would have been easier if you had just asked me to bring you chocolate," he chuckled. "But there are healthier ways to feel better about yourself."

"Old habits die hard," she said to herself as she scavenged through her cupboards.

"I like you the way you are, just so we're clear," he stated.

She smiled to herself. "I know you do."

He grinned as he watched her stretch upwards, on the tips of her toes, to reach a top cabinet. Her shirt rode up revealing a sliver of creamy, pale skin and he couldn't help but stare. As he took a step forward he spoke again, this time in a much huskier tone. "I love you."

She continued to smile to herself when she felt his hand on her lower back. The heat emitting from his palm sent shivers up her spine. She slowly planted both of her feet firmly on the floor and turned around. There wasn't an inch of space between them and she was pressed firmly against the counter. "It's really nice to hear that," she breathed.

"Good." He smiled as he placed both of his hands on her hips. "I'll probably say it a lot."

Her fingers slowly moved to play with the collar of his sweater. He was so wonderful; there was no reason why they couldn't…

She fisted her hand in his sweater and pulled him down for a very intense kiss.

One of Jackson's hands grasped her hip while the other tangled in her thick, auburn hair. He tilted his head to deepen the kiss and he groaned when she tightly gripped his shoulders in response.

He effortlessly lifted her up onto the counter and it caused her to release the sexiest sound, it was somewhere between a moan and a gasp. She wrapped her legs around his waist and pulled his hips into her body so that his excited manhood was pressed against her center.

He had been thinking about this ever since their first kiss.

He pulled away to catch his breath and he caringly caressed her shoulders and upper arms. "That was okay, right?" She asked before biting down on her bottom lip.

"Yeah, that was more than okay." He grinned as she pulled him in for another kiss. She slipped her hands underneath his sweater and groaned when her hands touched his bare skin. "God, April…I…I want you so badly," he revealed against her lips.

She held his face as she softly and seductively nibbled on his top lip. Her little action seemed to do the trick, his hands tightened on her waist and he hungrily kissed her fully on the mouth. She pulled away to tug his sweater over his head and it fell to the floor. She moaned into his mouth as her hands trailed over his chest. He was so built and toned, and his skin felt so nice.

Jackson dropped his mouth to her jaw and then down her neck. He triumphantly smiled to himself when she breathed his name. He could definitely get used to that sound.

He was in the middle of unbuttoning her blouse and kissing the newly exposed skin when her home telephone rang. He started to raise his head but she quickly pushed him back to her chest. "The machine can get it," she told him breathlessly.

"Good idea," he agreed with a chuckle.

Her phone rang three times before the answering machine cut in. Jackson laughed a little at April's perky introduction but his whole body froze when he heard a familiar voice start to leave her a message.

"Hey April, it's me…Charles…I heard about you and Karev and I was just wondering if you wanted to hang out tonight…ya know, as friends…We could go see a movie or something, doesn't matter…So gimme a call…uh, its Charles…Bye!"

Jackson slowly took a step backwards and April lowered her head so that she didn't have to look at him.

He had been so focused on the roadblocks that were Alex Karev and April's feelings about herself that he had forgotten that there was a reason why he couldn't do this. Charles was his best friend and the guy was so infatuated with April. Since April had rejected his date invitation, he had been walking around the apartment telling himself that he didn't care but Jackson knew that it was all bullshit and the message that he had just left on her machine proved it.

Charles was also his roommate, the man was like a brother to him, and he had harboured a crush on April since they were interns. He was now where April had been not too long ago. He understood her situation with Alex a little bit better now; it was surprisingly easy to forget about your enamoured best friend when you both had feelings for the same person.

He was being a really shitty best friend, and he just…he couldn't do this.

"I'm so sorry," he whispered.

* * *

**A/N: You forgot about the Charles problem, didn't you? :p Please leave a review! :)**

**Next chapter: More Japril, more Averys, and Alex and April have a serious, civil conversation.**

**Also, I'm going to add another chapter to There You Go Again :)**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: Thanks for all the reviews! I'm glad that you're still enjoying this story. :)**

**Disclaimer: Same as always.**

* * *

"_I'm so sorry," he whispered._

"No, Jackson, don't apologize," April replied quickly. "This is my fault."

"No, it isn't," he assured her. He picked his sweater up off of the kitchen floor and pulled it back on. April hopped off of the counter and began to redo her blouse.

Things were very quiet and tense. Neither one of them were sure what to say. They had been so swept up in the moment, so lost in each other, and it had evaporated instantly after hearing that message.

"He's my best friend," Jackson began regretfully.

She nodded in understanding and laughed humorlessly. "I know. I get it."

Apparently the only men that she was capable of falling for were her person's fiancé and her admirer's best friend.

Jackson closed his eyes and sighed. He had finally found a woman that he really liked…that he loved…and he couldn't have her. He reached for her hand and entwined their fingers. "I can't, I want to, but I—"

She stopped him by placing her fingers over his lips. "It's okay; we don't have to talk this out…_really_." She couldn't bear to hear anymore.

She walked away from him and he stared after her longingly. He wanted to talk it out. He clenched his fists as he exhaled heavily, this just wasn't fair.

April sat down on her sofa and crossed her legs as she ran a hand through her hair. He really was too good to be with her and that's what it came down to. Maybe this was a sign. "You can leave if you want, you don't have to stick around," she told him softly.

He frowned as he walked into the living room with his hands in the pockets of his jeans. "I don't want to leave."

"Well then what do you want?" She asked and the frustration was evident in her voice.

"I want you," he smiled. "You know that." He moved to sit next to her on the couch and reached out to place his hand on her knee. "It's just that Charles—"

"I know," she interrupted him. "But you didn't mention Charles when you were kissing me in my bed last month."

Jackson winced a little. "That's true," he murmured.

He had assured Charles that he wasn't into April, but ever since he had said that all he had done was pursue her, and he hadn't given Charles a second thought while doing so. His roommate had been so busy lately studying for the Boards and trying to perfect all of his techniques in neuro that he hadn't even noticed Jackson's frequent absences and strange moods, and even if he had noticed, he probably assumed that he was still messing around with Cristina Yang. Charles was in a little over his head but he was working his butt off and as a result, he was walking around like a zombie the majority of the time. There was no way that he had picked up on Jackson's feelings for April.

"You actually make it hard for me to think about anything else," he admitted with a small grin.

April's anger lifted and she placed her hand on top of his. "I told him that all we'll ever be is friends. I-I want to be with _you_." She scooted closer to him and leaned forward to place a kiss on the pulse point in his neck. "I'm in love with _you_."

And you can't help who you fall in love with.

She kissed his lips and smiled when he responded. He was in love with her too and he desperately wanted to be with her. It would be complicated, but as his mother said, love was always complicated, and their connection, the magnetic pull between them, was too strong to fight off. They had already been fighting it for far too long.

He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her into his lap. "I'll tell him," he spoke against her lips. "It should come from me."

"Are you sure?" She asked as she stroked his cheek.

He nodded. "Yeah." Charles would take the news even worse if it didn't come from him, he would feel even more betrayed. "I'll tell him," he repeated.

April pulled away from him and rested her head on his shoulder. She pressed her face against his neck and whispered, "I don't want to let you go but are you sure that you want to do this?"

He wrapped his arms tightly around her body and smiled to himself. "I don't think I've ever been surer of anything in my life."

April smiled gleefully before she kissed him again. "Let's eat, and I'll get you some more ice for your hand. I want you to be able to operate tomorrow."

"Okay," Jackson smiled.

He was confident that everything would be fine. They could do this.

* * *

First thing the next morning, Jackson was summoned to the Chief's office. He was expecting to be heavily reprimanded, he had known that punching a co-worker would have consequences, but instead he sat in a chair and Dr. Torres just stared at him. He was starting to feel a little uneasy, like she was trying to break him CIA style or something.

"How's your hand?" She asked after a long silence.

"Fine," he answered.

"Everyone says that you started it."

He replied honestly, "I did." He had always been taught to own up to his mistakes and it's not like he planned on getting in another fight anytime soon.

There was another long silence before the cardio surgeon leaned back in her seat and sighed, "Women suck."

Jackson furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. "Excuse me, Chief?"

"You and Karev were fighting because of a girl, right?" That was Mark Sloan's theory at least.

"Yeah," Jackson admitted. "He said something awful about the woman I love."

Callie nodded in understanding. "See, women make us do things we would never normally do."

Jackson was still incredibly confused about what she was talking about so he remained silent.

"You can leave now, Avery. I won't tell any of the hospitals that are interested in you about this. You're a good surgeon; you don't need this on your record."

His eyes widened slightly. He had anticipated a suspension. "Thank you Dr. Torres," he said gratefully as he stood up.

"Don't mention it," she replied tiredly as she rested her head in the palm of her hand.

Jackson left her office in a state of utter disbelief but he was quickly forced to compose himself when he spotted his mother waiting for him.

"How much trouble are you in?" She asked bluntly.

"None," he replied with a chuckle. She eyed him suspiciously until he spoke again. "I'm serious, none."

"Well you are incredibly lucky," she stated disapprovingly.

He hung his head bashfully as if he was a young child again. His mother knew how to conduct a guilt trip like nobody else.

Catherine placed her hand on his shoulder and offered him a small smile before she switched to a brighter topic. "Your father and I would like to take you and April out to lunch. Is that okay?"

"Yeah, that sounds good," he smiled. "I'll mention it to April."

His mother had obviously seen something in him that indicated that his relationship with April had changed for the better. It was eerie, sometimes he wondered if she had supernatural powers.

* * *

April, meanwhile, was trying to muster up the courage to knock on the door of Alex's office. She took a deep breath before she tapped her knuckles against the door.

"Come in!"

She opened the door and spotted Alex at his desk. He was filling out paperwork, he wasn't wearing his glasses, and his face was bruised. He finally glanced upwards, and he did not look happy to see her.

"Let's talk like adults," she suggested before he could say anything.

He dropped his pen and leaned back in his chair. "I'm sorry, okay? I shouldn't have said that but I was pissed and I know that you probably weren't cheating on me with Avery but you wanted to. Lover boy got me good so it's okay," he added bitterly as he gestured towards his face.

April walked towards his desk and didn't deny his observations. "We haven't been very happy," she whispered as she sat down.

"Nope," he agreed dejectedly. They had been trying to push themselves to some level of happiness but it hadn't been working, no matter how hard they tried. He knew that sex was a big issue for him and he had the feeling that Avery was the main issue for her.

There was a silence in which they just stared at each other until April spoke again. "I don't want to be anybody's second best and you shouldn't want to be mine."

Alex looked at her in confusion as he leaned forward in his chair. "What are you talking about?"

"I've gone my whole life thinking that nobody would want me, that nobody would take an interest in me," she breathed. "And you made me feel really wanted for the first time in my life, but you also made me feel horrible for a lot of different reasons. But Jackson," she paused and couldn't contain a smile. "He just makes me feel better."

Alex nodded in understanding. "That's how Meredith made me feel," he revealed candidly. "But you made me feel like I could still be somebody so thank you for that, and I'm sorry that I called you a slut. You're not, obviously." He laughed humorlessly before he spoke again. "I just need someone who can deal with all my crap. Someone who has as much crap as me."

April smiled sadly at him. She hoped that he would find someone. He was great when he wanted to be, and she understood what he meant when he said that he needed someone who could deal with all of his "crap". Jackson knew exactly how to deal with her.

"So what happened to make you so upset before you came over?" She asked curiously.

Alex groaned and ran a hand over his face. "I got an email from Chief Torres," he began. "And she said that hospitals are starting to inquire about all of the fifth years and interviews will be starting in a few weeks, and I'm the only fifth year that isn't being asked about."

"What?" April questioned in shock.

He nodded. "Yeah, she let me know as sort of like a heads up, I'm the Chief Resident, I'm supposed to have my pick of fellowships but even freakin' Percy is a more desirable fellow than me apparently." He took a deep breath before he told her his theory. "I think that Ellis Grey is blackballing me." She had let him back on her service, and he had been ecstatic about it, but now he thought that it was just a way to lull him into a false sense of security.

She stared at him in horror but his idea wasn't crazy. She wouldn't put it past Ellis Grey to do such a thing, and she carried around a lot of weight in the general field. "Well, um," she spoke uneasily, "Dr. Bailey is back, maybe she can help you?"

"Yeah, maybe," he mumbled. "This just sucks."

"Or!" She exclaimed excitedly. "You could ask Dr. Robbins to make some calls. She always seemed to like you when you did your peds rotations!"

Alex smiled a little. That was a really good idea and this conversation showed that he and April could be friends in the future…he still wouldn't mind having sex with her though.

* * *

Jackson tiredly changed out of his scrubs at the end of the day. Today had been a great day, he hadn't been banned from the OR and he had had an excellent lunch with April and his parents. They loved her. His father had raved about her surgical skills and his mother had made constant references to how polite and pretty she was. His mother had already sent her a friend request on Facebook and promised to email her baby pictures of him. His parents were already just as in love with her as he was.

Today had been a great day but there was an uncomfortable knot in his stomach. He was dreading his conversation with Charles but he knew that he needed to have it.

He gulped when Charles walked into the locker room. "Hey man, what's up?"

"Nothing much, I'm exhausted." He walked over to the refrigerator and grabbed a bottle of Gatorade.

"Do you wanna buy some beer on the way home and watch March Madness all night?" Jackson knew that it was low, but he wanted to butter up his friend before he broke the news.

Charles groaned. "I would love to but I can't. I'm working the night shift, I switched with Webber."

Jackson frowned. "Oh, that sucks."

"Yup," he agreed as he grabbed a few energy bars from his locker. "I'll see you later, man!"

"Yeah, later," Jackson murmured.

He grabbed his jacket and backpack before he left the locker room. He knew that April had already left the hospital so he headed straight to her apartment.

She opened the door breathlessly and anxiously asked, "Did you tell him?"

Jackson slowly shook his head as his eyes roved over her body. She was wearing her workout gear, her hair was pulled back into a ponytail, and her chest was heaving. "Um, no, I didn't get a chance."

He continued to stare at her as he stood on the doorstep. "You can come inside," she giggled as she opened the door wider for him.

He shifted his feet awkwardly as he closed the door behind him. He really shouldn't stay. He didn't need to see her all sweaty and flexible in her sports bra and little shorts. They had decided to keep the physical aspect of their relationship rather tame until they told Charles that they were together. It made them both feel a lot less guilty. So what he really needed to do was turn around and leave, but he followed her into the living room anyway.

She rolled up her yoga mat as she stretched her neck. "I was just doing some yoga. It really relaxes me and I was trying to work out this knot that I have in my back. But I still have it," she told him in frustration.

"Let me try," he offered without thinking.

"Would you?" She questioned shyly.

He wanted to kick himself for offering to give her a massage. As if he wasn't already having difficulty restraining himself. "Yeah," he nodded, "sure." He sat down on her couch and she excitedly raced towards him. He couldn't help but laugh at her as he pushed her hair to the side and placed his hands on her shoulders. He could hear the warning bells going off in his head. This was a bad idea. Such a bad idea.

But damn he loved her skin.

He found the knot in her back that she had to be referring to and pushed two fingers into the muscle. "Is that it?"

"Uh huh," she moaned.

Bad _bad_ idea.

"You have really great hands," she giggled. "What I mean by that is that I would expect a trauma surgeon's hands to be…" She trailed off and dissolved into laughter. "I have no idea what I'm trying to say."

He laughed along with her. "That's okay." He leaned forward as he moved his fingers up her neck. "Is that better?" He asked in a whisper.

She shivered as she felt his breath on the back of her neck. "Yeah," she breathed. She was enjoying this way more than she should be, and she was imagining the feel of his hands on other parts of her body.

She quickly spun around and practically attacked him. She roughly captured his mouth and pushed him down onto his back. He seemed surprised by her actions but he was clearly enjoying them. He kissed her back eagerly while his hands grabbed her waist.

They didn't even hear Lexie come in until she spoke. "It's about time," she commented as she watched them maul each other on the sofa.

Jackson and April pulled away from each other and looked up at her sheepishly.

"You're making out on my bed by the way," Lexie added.

"Sorry," April squeaked.

Jackson, however, smirked up at her. He wasn't sorry at all.

Lexie removed her jacket and placed her bag on the floor before she headed into the kitchen. "I am so moving into the empty bedroom upstairs," she spoke to herself. "It's definitely time to get some furniture."

April looked down at Jackson with flushed cheeks. "We really need to tell him."

Jackson pushed his forehead against hers and sighed. "I know."

* * *

**A/N: Please leave a review! :)**


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews! I'm starting a new job tomorrow so I have no idea if the updates will continue to be as frequent. I am going to try! :)**

**Disclaimer: Same as usual.**

* * *

"Boobs," April giggled loudly as she looked down at the Scrabble board. "You have an M.D. and boobs is the best that you can come up?" She asked incredulously.

Jackson shrugged with a grin as he tried to defend himself. "It was all I could come up with from the letters I have! I warned you that I'm not very good at this game," he laughed.

They were playing Scrabble in her living room and she was kicking his butt. He wanted to take her out on a real date but they couldn't because he still hadn't broken the news to Charles. A week had passed and he still hadn't told his best friend what was happening between him and April. The moment was never right or he never had the time to appropriately explain it to him, that's what he told himself anyway. But he was going stir crazy. He enjoyed hanging out with April at her apartment, but he wanted to do more than play board games, watch television, and study for the Boards. And he definitely wanted to do more than just kiss. He was restraining himself out of respect for Charles and it was driving him nuts.

"I think you're just intentionally being dirty," she accused playfully.

He chuckled, "I wish. I'm not having enough luck with my letters to do that."

April giggled as she leaned across the coffee table to kiss him. He responded eagerly so she pulled away just enough to speak and seductively bite down on her bottom lip. "Wanna go upstairs?"

Jackson gulped and awkwardly squeaked before he shook his head. "I should…I should probably get going actually."

Her face fell in disappointment. "Oh, okay."

He slowly got to his feet and grabbed his jacket off of the sofa. She followed him to the door and he innocently pecked her lips. "I'll see you tomorrow. I love you."

"Bye," she called softly.

She waited until he left before she frowned to herself. That wasn't exactly how she had imagined that going. She walked upstairs and knocked on Lexie's bedroom door. The room that she had envisioned turning into an office or library one day was now Lexie's and it was newly furnished. There wasn't much but she had a bed and a bedside table, and some new clothes to put in the closet.

April walked into the room and dejectedly stated, "I just asked Jackson to come upstairs with me and he said no. I may be a virgin but I know that's a bad sign."

Lexie chuckled as she placed the book that she was reading on the bedside table. "I wouldn't worry about it," she answered dismissively.

April sighed before she collapsed on Lexie's bed and made herself comfortable like the other woman did in her room. "Well I'm worrying."

The red-head had confided in her that she was ready to have sex but it seemed as if she hadn't blatantly come out and said that to Jackson, and whatever he was doing was messing with April's self-confidence. "Do you really think that after everything he's said and done he doesn't want to have sex with you?" She posed incredulously. "He's a guy, I'm pretty sure it's all he can think about."

"Then why didn't he want to come upstairs?" April asked with a petulant whine.

"He's probably just nervous, and weirded out about this whole Charles thing."

April groaned loudly as she tangled both of her hands in her hair. "I wish that he would tell him! I know that he doesn't want to hurt him, but if it keeps going like this then eventually he's going to catch us, and speaking from personal experience, that is _way _worse."

"You need to tell him these things," Lexie told her wisely.

April bolted into a sitting position and nodded. "You are right!" She jumped off of the bed and ran out the door. "Thanks Lexie!"

"No problem," she answered in confusion. She still wasn't used to how loony April acted sometimes.

* * *

April stepped into Jackson and Charles' apartment and looked around. The door was unlocked but no one appeared to be home. "Hello?" She called softly. "Anybody home?" She walked through the living room and kitchen and towards the bathroom and two bedrooms.

She froze in her tracks when Jackson stepped out of the bathroom fresh out of the shower. He was very wet and very very naked. He had a towel in his hands that he was using to dry his head and face. She covered her eyes with her hands before he caught her staring. "Oh my God! Oh my God! I am so sorry!"

Jackson jumped at the voice and quickly covered his lower body with the towel. "A-April," he stuttered. "I didn't hear you come in. What are you doing here?"

"I am so _so _sorry!" She continued to ramble apologetically as she spun around and headed in the opposite direction. Unfortunately, she still had her eyes closed and smacked into the doorway leading to the kitchen. "Ow!"

He rushed to her side and gently held her face. "Are you okay?" He asked in concern. He winced as he saw blood start to run out of her nose. "Shit, you're bleeding." He gently pressed his towel against her nose and smiled at the fact that she still had her eyes closed. "You can open your eyes now," he told her softly.

"No, I can't," she replied.

"Why not?"

"Because if I have this towel it means that you're naked again," she explained matter-of-factly. Naked and gorgeous.

He looked down at himself and flushed. "You are right. Wait one second." He raced into his bedroom and pulled on a pair of basketball shorts. He lead April into his room and sat her down on the bed. "Now you can open your eyes," he chuckled. She finally did and he smiled at her. "Are you okay?"

She nodded before she tilted her head forward. The fact that he was now wearing shorts wasn't really helping her. She could still see his perfect arms, chest and abs, and the delicious dip of his pelvis, and the line of fine hair that led to a very impressive part of his anatomy. Even his strong, powerful thighs were making her blush. She had never seen a more physically perfect man and she had never been more flustered in her entire life. All that she wanted to do was touch and she felt like a small child again because she could hear that voice in her head saying, 'Don't touch that.' She had come here to talk, not paw him.

Well, she wanted to talk to him so that she could hopefully paw him sometime in the near future.

She pulled the towel away and sniffed experimentally. "I think it's stopped bleeding."

"I'm gonna get you some ice just to be safe."

She waved dismissively. "Don't worry about it, nothing hurt but my pride."

He ignored her and went to the kitchen to retrieve some ice anyway. She took the ice from him and he encouraged her to lie back on his bed. "So, did I scar you for life?" He asked teasingly.

"Let's um…let's just pretend this never happened." It wasn't good for her to think about him naked. It made her want to do…things, and he wasn't going to let her do those things until the Charles situation was resolved.

"That bad, huh?" He joked modestly. He smiled to himself when colour filled her cheeks. He knew that he was good-looking and he worked hard to keep himself in shape, but he hadn't expected such a strong reaction from her. He propped himself up on his side and brought a hand up to stroke her heated face. "You're blushing like crazy." She looked so pretty when her cheeks turned that soft pink colour.

She grimaced as she turned her head to face him. "I didn't expect nudity. My mind is jumbled."

He smirked mischievously, "Would it make you feel better if we got even?" He had no idea where that line came from but he definitely should not have said it. The last thing that he needed was to think about her naked more than he already did.

Her brow furrowed in confusion. "Even? What?" Her mouth dropped open in shock when she finally figured it out. "Oh! No, definitely not, that would probably make things even worse, and make me even more embarrassed," she said at a rapid speed.

"Relax April," he laughed. "I was just kidding, and besides, I've already seen you in practically nothing."

"What?" She practically shrieked. "No, you haven't."

He grinned as he nodded. "Yeah, I have, you don't seem to care about your own privacy when you're drunk."

"Oh God," she muttered. She covered her blushing face with both of her hands. "That is mortifying."

"You have nothing to be embarrassed about, trust me," he stressed.

"Neither do you," she retorted automatically. "Sorry, it's just that I've…"

Her sentence trailed off and his curiosity got the better of him. "Am I the first guy you've seen naked? Outside of a hospital, I mean? Did you ever see Karev naked?"

"Um…I…no," she whispered.

He suppressed a smug smile. Based on everything else she had told him, it seemed as if she and the Chief Resident hadn't done much past second base. He could see that she was becoming uncomfortable and he regretted his words. "Forgive me for being an idiot."

"It's okay," she smiled softly. She laid the icepack aside and gently touched her nose. "I don't think it's broken or anything. What do you think?"

Jackson leaned in close and tenderly examined her face. It definitely wasn't broken and it wasn't swelling. She may end up with some light bruising but it wouldn't be too bad. "No, you look beautiful," he whispered.

"Thanks," she replied shyly.

He pressed his mouth to hers and she instantly responded to him. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled his body closer to hers.

He chuckled, "Maybe we shouldn't have talked so much about being naked."

She laughed melodically, "Probably not. Do you want to stop?" She asked in a whisper.

"No," he replied as he brushed her hair behind her ear. "Do you?"

She shook her head, wrapped her calves around his, and rolled him over onto his back. "No," she grinned.

He was taken aback by her boldness but he grinned up at her while he pushed her jacket off of her shoulders. She clutched his face and tantalizingly ran her tongue along his bottom lip as his hands slid down her body to cup her backside. He still couldn't get over what an unbelievably good kisser she was.

His phone went off to signal that he had received a text message and the noise startled April so much that her knee brushed against his crotch rather forcefully. He winced and she gasped.

"Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry," she repeated. She gently kissed his lips and her index finger attempted to smooth out his brow, which was wrinkled in pain. "Sorry," she whispered remorsefully. "You okay?"

He swallowed as her hand settled on the waistband of his shorts. He could feel her breath on his neck and all that he could seem to concentrate on was her body weight on top of him and the heat of her palm. Apparently, kneeing him in the balls hadn't killed the mood at all. "Yeah," he responded breathlessly, "I'm great."

"Good." She smiled before she leaned down to kiss him again.

He rolled her beneath him once again and discreetly glanced at his phone on the bedside table. Whoever had just sent him a message; he didn't have the slightest desire to respond to it.

They kissed hungrily as he started to rhythmically brush his hips against hers, with his shorts producing friction against her jeans. A low moan emitted from the back of April's throat and the noise caused Jackson to clutch the bed sheets beneath him. Her hands slowly trailed over his shoulder blades and down his back until they slipped into the back of his shorts. He couldn't help the rather unpleasant grunt that he made when her short nails scraped the top of his butt.

She giggled and she tore her mouth away from his to kiss along his jaw.

"What do you want April?" He whispered. "I mean, where do you want this to go?" He had left her apartment to avoid this exact scenario, but now that they had started, he didn't want to stop. She was intoxicating.

Before she could answer his question, a booming voice called out through the apartment. "Hey Avery! You home?"

April and Jackson exchanged looks of wide eyed panic. That was Charles! Jackson cursed under his breath, he was so screwed.

"What do we do?" April asked him frantically.

"Umm…I…hide in the closet!"

She did as he suggested and ran into his closet while he scrambled to his feet and burst out into the hallway, slamming his bedroom door shut as went. "Hey man, what's up?" He greeted Charles as casually as he could.

Charles screwed up his face in disgust as he looked his roommate over. "Dude, I've known you for a long time but I really don't need to see you like this."

Jackson glanced below his waist and grimaced. It was way too obvious how turned on he was.

"Is Yang here again?" He questioned. Jackson merely nodded. "Well I'm just gonna order a pizza and watch the game, I'll stay out of your way."

"Cool," Jackson replied before he walked back into his room.

He closed and locked the door behind him. He took a deep breath before he approached the closet and slowly pulled the doors open. April stood inside looking even more bashful than usual. He shot her a small smile before he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her to him.

"I really didn't know what else to say," he explained. "That would have been a shitty time to tell him."

"Yeah," she agreed in a whisper. She just hated sneaking around, it brought back bad memories.

His eyes widened again as a thought occurred to him. "Where did you park?"

"Around the corner," she answered quickly. "Your street is full."

He sighed in relief, "Okay, good. Do you wanna stay and watch TV?"

April thoughtfully chewed on her bottom lip. "I don't know if I should."

"You won't be able to sneak out," he pointed out logically.

"Right." She awkwardly sat on the edge of his bed and forced a smile. "Sure, let's watch TV."

He sat down next to her and grabbed the remote to turn his television on. He found a movie and laid the remote back on the bedside table.

"I'm sorry that I kissed you," he said after a long silence. "I shouldn't have done that, not here anyway. Not knowing that my clueless roommate could come home at any second."

She shifted her position so that she faced him. "I kissed you back so it's okay. It's just…things are getting so messy. It shouldn't be like this."

He nodded understandingly and whispered, "Yeah." And that was his fault. He just needed to man up and tell his friend that he was in love. Maybe he would understand.

They stared into each other eyes until their lips met in another kiss. Neither of them was sure who had made the first move but it didn't matter. April wrapped her arms around his neck and eased herself back onto his bed, pulling him down with her. He slipped his hand underneath her blouse and caressed her bare side.

He dropped his mouth to her neck and April tossed her head back. She ran a hand over his head while her other hand clutched his back. Her mind was racing with questions that had hit her all of a sudden and she couldn't help but voice some of them aloud. "Why do you think we're doing this now? We've known each other for five years and nothing even close to this has happened. Why do you think it's happening now?"

Jackson raised his head and gently kissed her lips before he answered her question. "I dunno," he replied honestly. He remembered Lexie's words from a long time ago. "I guess that timing is everything. I just look at you now and have the most overwhelming urge to kiss you…all the time. Why do you think it's happening now?" He questioned in return.

She moved her hands slowly over his shoulders and down his arms. "Because you are the exact opposite of Alex Karev," she responded truthfully. "You're a good guy. You're sweet and genuine, and you have a beautiful heart."

He nodded in understanding and he had to admit that a reason why he had been attracted to her initially was also because she was the opposite of someone who had hurt him. She made him feel more wanted and needed than Cristina ever had.

His thumb started to rub circles into her hip as he spoke slowly. "You said that he made you feel desirable. How do I make you feel?" He inquired huskily.

His movements were sending shivers down her spine and producing a hot coil in her stomach at the same time. His eyes were smouldering as they looked at her and she knew that she was enjoying this so much because he would be just as content if they were watching television.

"You make me feel…worthy…"

"Good," he breathed, "Because you are."

She wrapped her arms tightly around his shoulders and pulled him down for a passionate kiss. She ended the kiss to drag her lips along his jaw until she reached his ear. "Make love to me," she whispered.

Jackson raised himself up and rested the weight of his body on his hands, which were planted on either side of her small frame. "What?" He asked in shock.

She blushed as she bit down on her bottom lip. "I want you to be my first."

"I thought, um…" He trailed off and swallowed nervously. He knew that she was religious. "Don't you want to wait for marriage or something?"

"I was waiting for the right person," she stated with a smile. "I want to, and I'm ready, and I want it to be with you."

He lowered his head and brushed his nose against her cheek as he kissed her softly. "Are you sure?" He asked considerately. She hummed and seductively ran her fingers down his chest. He twitched at her touch and chuckled huskily. "Okay, but not here, not now. I haven't even taken you out on a date yet."

"Well take me out on a date," she responded playfully.

"I will," he smiled. "And until then…" He paused and rolled over onto his side. He draped his arm across her waist and pressed a kiss into her hair. "We cuddle."

* * *

Meredith snuck up on Cristina and whispered in her ear, "What are you doing?" She was standing in the hallway slyly looking around the corner. It was hard for Cristina Yang to look inconspicuous in Seattle Grace but she was doing a good job of it now.

The Asian woman jumped and spun around to face her friend with wide eyes. "I'm spying, can't you tell? And don't sneak up on me like that!"

Meredith chuckled but followed Cristina's movements as she discreetly peeked around the corner. They were watching Dr. Torres interact with a tall, skinny, blonde woman, but Meredith had no idea why. "Why are you spying?" She questioned.

"I think that's the new Head of Cardio but I have no idea who it is," she whispered.

Meredith stood upright and straightened out her blue blouse. She adjusted her purse on her shoulder and flicked her hair out of her face. "Well, you'll find out soon enough."

"Yes, but I want to know now," Cristina replied impatiently.

Meredith rolled her eyes before she grabbed Cristina's elbow and started to drag her away. "Come on." Cristina was already wearing her scrubs but Meredith still had to change.

Cristina huffed in annoyance before she gave in and walked alongside Meredith. They reached the locker room and she spoke immediately upon entering.

"Hey Avery, you always overhear all of the gossip. Heard anything about a new Head of Cardio?"

Jackson turned his attention away from April and looked at Cristina. "Nope."

"Useless," she muttered. She grabbed her lab coat before she left the room.

"She seems stressed," April commented timidly.

Meredith laughed softly. "She's worried about her OR time."

April nodded in understanding. Everyone knew how intense Cristina was about cardio and it would be stressful to know that there was a new attending that could have an influence over your career, especially so close to fellowship interviews and the Boards. She was happy that she had Sloan.

"Anyway," Meredith chimed after she finished changing into her scrubs. "I'll see you guys at lunch."

"Bye Mer," April waved. She waited until Meredith walked through the door before she slipped her hands into the pockets of Jackson's lab coat and tugged him towards her. "What time are you picking me up tonight?"

"Seven thirty," he answered with a smile.

"And what about Charles?" She inquired worriedly.

Jackson sighed as he played with the hair at the end of her ponytail. "I am telling him tonight."

April frowned as she observed his uneasy expression. "It'll be okay," she whispered comfortingly.

"Yeah, I know," he murmured. He leaned down and quickly stole a kiss. "Wear that black dress tonight."

"What black dress?"

He grinned, "The one you wore on Valentine's Day." The brand new dress that she had worn the night that she had gotten stood up…the dress that only he had seen her in.

She smiled as she felt her cheeks flush. She distinctively remembered him unzipping that dress. "Okay," she whispered. She gently placed a hand on his chest before she took a step backwards. "I have to get to the burn unit but I will see you tonight." She shot him an excited smile before she skipped out of the room.

* * *

Jackson smiled widely into the mirror after brushing his teeth. He was trying to talk himself out of feeling nervous but it wasn't working. He had been on dozens of first dates, but never had one meant as much to him as this one did. He was taking the woman he loved out for the first time and he was afraid that she would be disappointed, that she wouldn't have a good time, or that it wouldn't live up to her expectations. He was afraid that _he_ wouldn't live up to her expectations.

He walked back into his bedroom and changed into a pair of tailored black pants and a blue, silk shirt. He tied a black tie around his neck and slipped into a pair of dress shoes before he walked towards his bedside table. He picked up the small box lying on the tabletop, a little gift that he had gotten for April, and placed it in his pocket.

He grabbed his jacket and left his bedroom. He walked into the living room and spotted Charles sitting on the sofa with a bottle of beer in his hand. "Hey man," he greeted softly.

"Hey." Charles looked away from the television set and laughed as he took in his roommate's wardrobe. "You have a hot date or something?"

Jackson took a deep breath before he responded. "Yeah, about that."

* * *

**A/N: I bet you can guess who the new Head of Cardio is! :)**

**Please leave a review! :)**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews for the last chapter and a big thanks to those of you that reviewed the final chapter of The Shadow. I hope that this update makes up for the wait! :)**

**Disclaimer: Same as always.**

* * *

April unlocked the front door of her apartment with a girlish, carefree giggle. Her first real date with Jackson had been everything that she had imagined it would be. Comfortable and romantic, and just perfect. He had done exactly what he had said he would do on Valentine's Day. He had taken her to his favourite restaurant where he had ordered her favorite meal and an unbelievable bottle of champagne, and then they had gone for a walk on the pier. It was a rather chilly and misty night but he had given her his jacket and held her close as they had strolled. He had been the perfect gentleman and he looked so incredibly handsome. It was hard for her to take her eyes off of him. She wasn't sure how she had gotten so lucky to have this wonderful guy love her. It didn't seem real.

"Thank you so much for such a wonderful night," she said as they walked into her apartment.

"It was my pleasure," he smiled brightly. He was just over the moon that the whole thing hadn't turned into a disaster. She had legitimately enjoyed herself and for that he was grateful. "And I have a little something for you."

She gazed up at him excitedly as she grasped the lapels of his jacket. "I have something for you too," she breathed suggestively. The champagne was making her rather bold but she knew what she wanted. She wanted him.

She roughly pressed her lips against his and he pulled away with a bashful chuckle. She probably wouldn't feel as generous after he told her what he was holding back, but he wanted to give her her present first. He wanted to keep her happy for a tad longer. He pulled the small box out of his pocket and presented it to her. "I may not be a penguin," he began with a grin. "But I did spend a lot of time looking on the beach."

He lifted the cover off of the box and she looked at a small, lovely piece of beach glass tied on a black string. "Aww, Jackson," she whispered in disbelief. "You are so sweet."

She kissed him again and before he could say anything, she started to drag him up over the stairs and into her bedroom. She laid his gift on her dresser before she pushed his jacket off of his shoulders.

"April, I…I don't know about this," he protested between eager kisses.

April grinned as she wrapped her arms tightly around his waist. "I've thought about it. I've thought about it _a lot_, and I really want to, and now we've gone on a date…" She trailed off and kissed down his neck before she giggled uncontrollably. "I even bought new panties," she whispered as she felt blush spread across her cheeks.

Jackson groaned and his fingers tightened on her hips. He definitely wanted to see her new panties, and he loved the feeling of her lips on his neck. "I didn't tell him," he revealed in a whisper.

Her body tensed and she pulled away so that she could look him in the eye. "What do you mean you didn't tell him?" She asked incredulously.

Jackson gulped nervously. "Charles was sitting on the couch with a beer and all that I could imagine was him hitting me over the head with the bottle, and I just…I couldn't tell him." He had mumbled something about having a date with a woman that his mother had set him up with and then he had fled his place.

April sighed heavily before she rested her head on his chest. "You just have to tell him," she told him seriously. She was trying not to become too frustrated with him because she knew that this was difficult for him. He didn't want to hurt his best friend. "The moment will never be right; it's never going to feel good. You just have to get it over with so that you guys can start to move past it."

He nodded to himself as he ran his hands along the bare portion of her back. "You're right…you're right."

After a minute or so of silence, April spoke sadly, "We're not going to have sex tonight, are we?"

He grinned before kissing the top of her head. "We don't have to rush anything, April," he stated soothingly.

"But I want to," she whined.

He smiled as he effortlessly lifted her off of the ground and carried her to her bed. "You're really hard to say no to, ya know?" Especially with the way that she looked in that dress…all soft, pale skin and bare shoulders and slender legs.

She huffed as he settled her onto her back and hovered over her. "Well you're doing a pretty good job of it right now."

He smiled before leaning down to gently kiss her. "I think we should take our time. It should be special. We've known each other for a long time but I think that we should get to know each other in this new way before jumping into bed together."

April sighed before agreeing with him. "You are so annoyingly perfect."

He grinned smugly, "I try."

She playfully smacked his shoulders before she asked, "Are you going to stay the night?"

"Yes," he replied without hesitation.

"Good!" She smiled excitedly. He allowed her to stand up and she turned so that her back was facing him. "Unzip me."

Jackson exhaled heavily as he reached forward to grab her zipper. He vividly remembered the last time that she had asked him to do this. At least now he knew that he could touch. He leaned forward and placed kisses down the newly exposed skin of her back as he slowly pulled down the zipper.

"Jackson," she moaned. "You just said…"

"That doesn't mean I can't do this," he murmured against her skin. He wrapped his arms tightly around her waist and pulled her down into his lap. He moved his mouth up to her shoulder and she tilted her neck to the side to give him more room. "You have gorgeous skin."

"You have gorgeous everything," she giggled.

"Right, you've seen my everything," he chuckled. He squeezed his eyes shut and held back a groan. Great, now he was thinking about her everything. He rested his chin on her shoulder and gently ran his hands down her arms. "Let's go to bed."

"Okay," April replied rather disappointedly. She stood up again and headed towards her dresser. She pulled a tank top and a pair of shorts out of her drawer and began to undress with her back to him. She didn't want to tease him but she wasn't about to hide away either.

Jackson watched, mesmerized, as he undressed as well. He tugged on his tie as April pulled the tank top on over her head before shimming out of her dress completely. Ah, there they were: the new panties. Black, lace, _really _tiny. He gulped before he forced his eyes shut and turned away.

He reopened his eyes when he felt April's tiny fingers unbutton his shirt. "Do you need some help?" She asked with a mischievous twinkle in her eyes.

His eyes roved over her body as she pulled the tail of his shirt out of his pants before pushing it off of his shoulders. He had seen her in less than a tank top and shorts but for some reason, her current outfit was driving him crazy. He gripped her hips as she tantalizingly ran her hands down his chest before they settled on his belt buckle. "You're going to kill me, woman," he grumbled.

April giggled before she leaned forward to place kisses along his collarbone. "I'll give you a reprieve; I'm going to the bathroom." She gave him a soft kiss on the lips before she left her bedroom and headed down the stairs.

Jackson smiled to himself as he removed the rest of his clothes besides his boxers, neatly folded them, and set them on the chair in the corner of her room. He pulled back the covers of April's bed and slipped underneath them. He lay on his back and rested his head beneath his hands as he waited for April to return. He knew that his willpower was certainly going to be tested but he was up for it. She may not like it now, but he knew that waiting would be good for her, and for their relationship.

* * *

Cristina slammed her lunch tray down onto the table and Meredith and April looked up at her in concern.

"Are you okay?" Meredith asked tentatively.

"The new Head of Cardio is Teddy Altman," Cristina explained as if that was answer enough. The blonde and the red-head continued to look up at her in confusion and Cristina huffed as she slumped in her seat. "I've never heard of her. According to Google, she doesn't exist. Can you say red flag?"

Meredith laughed softly. "I'm sure she exists, you just may need to dig a little deeper. Seattle Grace doesn't hire nobodies."

"No, your mother didn't hire nobodies," Cristina corrected. "Torres is Chief now; it's a whole new ball game."

"Well, then learn how to play a new position," April told her encouragingly. Cristina raised an eyebrow while Meredith stared at her in shock. "What?" She questioned self-consciously as she stopped chewing the carrot stick that she had been munching on. "Was that not the appropriate sports analogy?"

"No, it was fine," Cristina answered. "It's just that your optimism is nauseating sometimes."

April smiled softly before she returned to her lunch. Her good mood was almost impossible to dampen nowadays. Surgery was going great, her Boards preparation was going great, and she had Jackson. Waking up next to him, wrapped in his arms, was the most wonderful feeling.

As if reading the red-head's mind, Meredith inquired, "How are things going with Jackson?"

"Amazing," April replied with a timid smile. "He's so great. I just wish that he'd tell Charles about us." Meredith and Cristina already knew about them and she was afraid that rumors would spread throughout the hospital before Jackson got a chance to talk to him. He needed to nip it in the bud now.

"I'm sure he'll do it soon," Meredith responded hopefully.

Her good mood was hard to dampen as well.

"Have you guys done it yet?" Cristina asked bluntly. April blushed and that was all the response that she needed. "You should get around to that. He's really good in bed."

The inappropriateness of Cristina's comment seemed to escape her, but it caused April to shift uncomfortably in her chair. "We really don't need to talk about that right now," she mumbled in embarrassment.

Cristina shrugged, "Your choice."

* * *

Jackson signed off on a patient's chart before he handed it to one of the nurses sitting behind the nurses' station. He smiled in thanks and tucked his pen into his breast pocket. He was finishing up in the pit for the evening when a familiar voice called his name.

"Hey Dr. Avery!"

He spun around and smiled at the pretty paramedic. "Hey Clare, how's it going?"

"I'm good. How are you? I haven't seen you in a while." Their flirtation had abruptly ceased and she wasn't quite sure why.

"Yeah, I've been really busy." He paused and thoughtfully chewed on his bottom lip, a habit that he had definitely picked up from April, before he spoke again. "And I've started to see someone." He figured that it was important to tell her. He didn't want to lead her on or anything.

She frowned. "Oh…well that's good for you. Anyone I know?"

"Yeah, it's Dr. Kepner," he answered truthfully.

"Well that's really good for you," she repeated. "I should have known," she stated with a sigh. She had seen the red-headed resident watching him and she had seen them interact with each other. "You always seemed like a man in love."

Jackson felt guilty for hurting the nice girl's feelings but he smiled when a thought struck him. "Hey, do you know my friend, Charles Percy?"

After talking up Charles to Clare, Jackson left the emergency room with a broad grin. Maybe setting Charles up with a woman was a good approach. It was a little devious but maybe it would all work out.

Jackson was caught off guard when he felt two small hands grab his lab coat and pull him into a supply closet. He laughed as he looked down at his petite girlfriend. "Hi."

"Hi," she smiled back at him. "I was jealous there for a second." She had watched him talk to the paramedic but had managed to restrain herself from charging towards them and wrapping herself around Jackson.

He cocked an eyebrow and a grin pulled at the corner of his mouth. "Oh really?"

She flushed before she muttered in a high-pitched voice, "Just a little bit."

He chuckled before he leaned down to kiss her. "Well you know that you have no reason to be."

She smiled happily and rested her head against his chest. "Yeah, I know."

* * *

"Okay," Charles groaned loudly. He placed his hands on his knees and hunched over as he tried to catch his breath. His and Jackson's routine on their days off was to work out a little in the morning and then play some basketball before they grabbed something to eat at their favourite greasy diner. He loved their routine but he wasn't sure why he kept playing one on one with his roommate. The guy always kicked his ass. He had the height advantage but Avery had the moves. "Let's take five."

Jackson chuckled as he dribbled the basketball between his legs. "Okay, break time."

Charles walked to the edge of the outdoor basketball court and grabbed his bottle of water.

Jackson waited until Charles had gulped down half the bottle before he spoke. "So, you know Clare? The cute, blonde paramedic?"

"Yeah," Charles nodded. "What about her?"

"Well I was talking to her in the pit yesterday and she wants to go out with you. Whatta ya think?" He asked with a bright smile.

The burly man shrugged before he stole the basketball from Jackson and dunked it in the hoop. "I don't think so," he replied dismissively.

"Why not?" Jackson asked quickly. "She's really nice, and smart, and funny—"

"Then why don't you go out with her," Charles laughed.

"Because I already have a girlfriend," Jackson confessed after taking a deep breath. He had to tell him, he couldn't keep chickening out.

Charles' eyebrows shot into his hairline. "Really? Who is it? How long have you two been together? Why didn't you tell me before?"

Jackson shuffled his feet awkwardly before placing his hands on his hips and raising his head so that he could look Charles square in the eye. "It's April. April and I are together."

Charles laughed in disbelief before he bit out, "What? Are you serious?" Jackson nodded and so he threw the basketball at the other man with all of the strength that he had in him. "What the hell Avery? You're supposed to be my friend!"

"I know," Jackson groaned, "and I'm sorry." He had managed to catch Charles' very hard pass but his hands were stinging.

Charles ignored his apology. "You could have any woman you want! Why'd you have to go after her?" He questioned in hurt and frustration.

"I didn't…I…it's not like that…I-I," he stuttered. He took a deep breath and angrily pinched the bridge of his nose before he spoke again. "I just fell for her, man. I know that I crossed the line here but—"

Charles interrupted him. "Crossed the line?" He suddenly felt like he was in the episode of _Friends _where Chandler tells Joey that he kissed his girlfriend. Jackson was so far past the line that he couldn't even see the line anymore. This was so against the bro code! "Crossed the line doesn't even begin to describe what you did! You know how I feel about her and you told me that you weren't into her!"

"I know!" He groaned again. "But I'm in love with her, and she loves me too."

Charles didn't even have a response for that, but his hands tightened and he wished that he was holding the basketball again. "I still can't believe you did this. How long have you been lying to me about this?" He finally asked.

"Longer than I should have," Jackson admitted.

"Since her and Karev broke up?" Jackson nodded and he gritted his teeth. That meant that April had been the woman hiding in his bedroom that he had mistaken for Cristina Yang and she had been the woman that he had taken out to the dinner the other evening. "So that's why you punched his lights out," he said more to himself than Jackson. That made so much more sense than Jackson getting violent about something work related. "I can't believe this!" He repeated. He grabbed his bag, slung it over his shoulder, and started to walk away.

"Hey," Jackson called. "Where are you going?" He was walking in the opposite direction of their apartment.

"Don't know!" Charles yelled back. "I just need to not look at your stupid face for a while!"

Jackson groaned in frustration as he furiously bounced the basketball off of the pavement. That had been the very worst case scenario that he had envisioned.

* * *

**A/N: Please leave a review!**

**Happy Canada Day my fellow Canadians! :)**


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: Sorry for the wait! I will admit that I struggled with this chapter and I'm still not sure if I'm completely satisfied with it but I hope that it's okay.**

**Disclaimer: Same as always.**

* * *

April opened her front door to find a very dejected looking Jackson standing on the other side. He was wearing basketball shorts and a tight, short sleeved shirt so she would have assumed that he was just physically tired but she instantly knew that it was more than that. His body language gave everything away, slumped shoulders and sad eyes. She frowned before she stated the obvious. "You told him."

Jackson nodded. "Yeah, I did," he sighed. "It sucked."

She discarded the cleaning gloves that she had been wearing, for her days off meant that she got the chance to do housework, before she grabbed Jackson's hands and pulled him inside. Even though she felt relieved that they could finally be together in public, she felt so bad for him. He had finally broken the news to Charles about them and he was clearly upset. She led him into the living room and let him lie on the sofa so that his head was resting in her lap.

She ran her hand over his scalp as she whispered, "Tell me what happened."

Jackson sighed once again and squeezed his eyes shut in frustration. "He thinks that I betrayed him, which I did."

"But it's not like you set out to hurt him," April argued softly. "Your intentions weren't malicious."

"I know, I know," he sighed, "but still. I feel like a jerk."

"But you're not." She leaned down and gently kissed his lips. "You're a good guy." She stroked his cheek with her thumb before she kissed him again.

"I'm glad you think so," he whispered. He felt better about himself already; her presence did that to him. He slipped a hand into her hair and kept her pulled down to him so that their lips stayed joined. "I love you."

"I love you too," she smiled happily. She continued kissing him as she slipped a hand underneath his shirt.

They were interrupted by the door opening and closing and then the sound of Lexie's voice.

"You two weren't about to do something kinky, were you?"

April rolled her eyes and ignored her roommate's question. "Hey Lexie," she greeted. "How was work?"

Lexie shrugged before pulling Jackson up into a sitting position and plopping down in between the happy couple. "It was good." She felt like she was finally getting her life together and that was great, but today an unforeseen complication had arisen. "One of the guys at work asked me out."

April's eyes lit up excitedly. "Oh really?"

"Yeah," Lexie replied in slight annoyance. Her co-worker, George, was nice and really sweet, and cute in an "adorkable" kind of way. But she wasn't sure if she was ready for a relationship, or even to go out on a casual date.

She didn't know if it would be good for her recovery process. Group was going great, work was going great, and she was even thinking about starting night classes at one of the community colleges. She didn't want to jeopardize any of that. She was just getting back on track; she didn't want to get derailed again because of some guy.

"Are you going to say yes?" April persisted with an excited grin.

Jackson merely sat next to his friend and didn't attempt to involve himself in her love life. "Maybe I should go," he began tentatively as he slowly got to his feet. "So that you guys can have girl talk."

April hopped to her feet and looked at him in a panic. "No, stay, please! Just, um, go up to my room. I'll be there in a second."

He nodded before doing what he was told. He headed to her bedroom and laid on the bed while he waited for her.

She entered her room several minutes later and lay down beside him. She placed a hand on his stomach and propped her chin on his chest. She smiled when he raised his hand and threaded his fingers through her hair. Maybe his mood was beginning to lift a little bit.

"So is she going to go out with him?" He asked in a murmur.

"I have no idea," she replied with a laugh. "Lexie is going to do whatever she wants, regardless of what I say."

He laughed along with her and nodded in agreement.

After a few moments of silence, she tentatively asked, "Are you feeling any better?"

"You make me feel better," he answered honestly.

She scooted upwards and softly kissed his lips. "Good. I would hate for you to think that you ruined a great friendship for nothing."

"I definitely don't think that," he assured her quickly. "You're worth anything."

She flushed due to his words before she kissed him again. "So are you," she whispered.

They kissed innocently until he pulled away so that he could yawn. "I'm exhausted," he confessed. "Can we take a nap?"

"Sure," she nodded.

She rolled over onto her side and he immediately spooned her from behind. He draped his arm across her waist and found her hand so that he could entwine their fingers. He smiled when his fingers skimmed her wrist and he found that she was wearing the bracelet that he had given her.

Something so small and simple lifted his spirits and brightened his day.

* * *

Cristina stormed into the locker room and every resident present turned their attention towards her. Luckily, the only people in the room were Meredith and April.

"Whoa. What happened?" Meredith asked cautiously.

The cardio surgeon stuffed her purse into her locker before she angrily started to change her clothes. "I finally found out all about Teddy Altman."

"And?" Meredith prompted.

Cristina sighed before she responded. "She was in the Army with Owen. Torres brought her here _for_ Owen."

April's brow furrowed in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"She's his best friend," she explained. "Torres thought that bringing her here would help him get through their divorce proceedings, and that maybe she could help him with his PTSD."

April and Meredith exchanged knowing looks. Cristina was clearly upset because she thought that Teddy Altman was much more than Owen Hunt's friend. The red-head instantly felt sympathy towards the usually cold woman, especially since she remembered what they had talked about on the air vent.

"What's she like as a teacher?" Meredith inquired after a long silence.

Cristina frowned, "She's great, that's the worst part."

Their locker room girl talk was interrupted when Charles strode inside with his head down. He single-mindedly walked towards his locker while the three women looked on.

April took a deep breath before she walked towards the large man. Charles hadn't spoken to Jackson in two days and she knew that she needed to do something. If she and Meredith were friends again then surely the two men could repair their relationship. She wanted to apologize to him for her actions and she also wanted to persuade him to let Jackson off the hook.

"Charles," she spoke softly. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to—"

He cut her off abruptly but his tone wasn't harsh. "It's okay, April. You're not the one that betrayed me."

"He's really sorry and he just wants to talk to you, to explain."

Charles shook his head. "He's really the last person that I want to talk to." He grabbed his scrubs and headed towards the bathroom before April could say anything else.

She sighed and leaned her head back against the locker's wooden frame. She had so many other things going on that she did not need another thing to stress her out. But this feud with Charles was upsetting Jackson and therefore, it was upsetting her.

Her boyfriend was on Dr. Bailey's service today and she hoped that the change of pace and scenery would be good for him.

* * *

Jackson walked up to the short attending and stood at her side. "I have checked on all of your post-ops and no fistulas," he declared with a small smile.

Bailey glanced up at him and cocked an eyebrow. "What are you moping about Avery?"

He looked down at her in confusion. He still wasn't used to this brasher, more upfront version of Dr. Bailey, but she was definitely a more respected doctor and she seemed to teach a resident a valuable lesson at least once a day. He wasn't exactly sure what she was getting at though, he thought that he was doing a solid job of disguising his mood. "I don't know what you mean."

"You've been mopey all day. Is this not exciting enough for you? Because you should know that trauma surgeons do their fair share of general procedures. Or are you mopey because Percy found out about your little love affair with Kepner?" The resident raised his eyebrows in surprise and she smiled smugly. "I'm Bailey, I know everything."

"Yeah, I'm upset about Charles," he admitted sheepishly after a moment. "He won't talk to me."

"Man up, Avery!" Bailey advised him harshly. "If you want him to forgive you then make him forgive you."

Jackson leaned his elbows on the nurses' station in interest. "How?"

The general surgeon shrugged indignantly. "I don't know. You're men; you forgive each other in stupid ways. You swallow spoonfuls of cinnamon and streak through public venues. Come up with something original."

Jackson chuckled to himself. Dr. Bailey definitely had a point; Charles would be more likely to forgive him if he made a fool out of himself. "Thanks Dr. Bailey," he smiled genuinely.

"Don't mention it. Seriously, don't mention it." She grabbed a stack of charts and walked off muttering, "I wish they'd stop telling me about their problems. Already know too much about their love lives."

After carefully checking on Bailey's post-ops one last time, Jackson headed to the locker room where he thankfully found the two people that he wanted to see, April and Charles. He grabbed his girlfriend by the waist and gave her a long, intense kiss. He pulled away and gazed at April's startled expression as he kept an arm wrapped around her.

He turned to Charles and began to speak. "There! I love her, I do, so I'm not going to stop seeing her, but I will do anything else to make this up to you. I will walk on coals, I will eat whatever disgusting concoction you can come up with, I will give you the best traumas that come into the pit," he continued earnestly. "Anything, I'm serious."

Charles folded his arms across his chest and thought about it for a moment. "Your car. I want your car."

Jackson's mouth dropped open in shock. His car? He had not expected Charles to say that. Like most guys, he was pretty attached to his car. He drove a silver Mercedes-Benz S-Class that was in pristine condition while Charles owned a beat up Honda Civic.

But if handing over his car meant that things would go back to normal between him and Charles then it really wasn't a contest.

Jackson reached into his locker and pulled his car keys out of his jacket pocket. He tossed them to his roommate with a smile. "There you go."

"Wow," Charles whistled as he played with the keys in his hand. "I really didn't think that you would do it. I just said it but I didn't think you'd actually do it."

"It's just a car," Jackson shrugged. "It can be replaced, some other things can't."

Charles grinned and threw the keys up in the air. He clapped Jackson on the shoulder before he started to walk out of the locker room. "See ya at home, bud."

Once they were alone, April looked up at Jackson in awe. "You just gave up your baby."

He chuckled as he tucked her hair behind her ear. "Like I said, it's just a car."

"I just really didn't think you would do it," she laughed. He rolled his eyes before he dipped his head and pressed his mouth to hers. She wrapped her arms around his waist and hugged him tightly. He had just given up his car for someone that he cared about. She didn't know very many people that would do that.

When they broke apart she saw that his brow was furrowed and she instantly became concerned. "What's wrong?"

"I'm gonna need a ride home."

April laughed as she gently smacked his chest. "I think that I can arrange that."

* * *

**A/N: Please leave a review!**

**Next chapter: April tries to seduce Jackson and Ellis forces Callie to make a policy change that annoys most of the staff.**


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: Sorry for the long wait. I would have had this chapter up much earlier but I had some technical difficulties and work really tired me out this week. Again, I apologize, and I hope that you enjoy this update. :)**

**Disclaimer: Same as always.**

* * *

Jackson groaned and gripped the bed sheets beneath him as April wrapped her legs tightly around his waist and trailed her hands down his bare back.

They had been doing this for the past week, making out before they went to sleep, but tonight things had gotten exceptionally intense rather quickly. Both of their shirts were on the floor and his jeans and boxers were riding low on his hips. He was enjoying himself, of course he was. He was a red-blooded male so he was only able to deny her so much for so long. She was pretty persistent and so beautiful, and he wanted her so badly, but…

He laughed in surprise when she pushed him onto his back and straddled his waist. She kissed him hungrily before she sat up and reached backwards to undo the clasp of her bra.

Jackson shot up into a sitting position and quickly grabbed her hands. "Wait. Don't."

April leaned forward and brushed the tip of her nose against his cheek before she captured his lips. "Why?" She whispered impatiently.

"Because," he laughed darkly, "if you take your bra off then I'm not going to be able to stop."

She grinned as she ran her hands all over his upper body before she rested them on the waistband of his boxers. "I don't want you to stop."

"April," he whined. She had already discovered where he was most sensitive and she was teasing him. Actually, she was trying to seduce him. Her fingertips were travelling along the dip beneath his pelvic bone. He squirmed beneath her and rested his head on her shoulder. His breath hitched and he exhaled against her skin. For someone with so little experience, she certainly knew what to do to weaken his resolve. He bit the inside of his cheek and gathered all of the willpower that he had in him.

"We should go to sleep," he murmured after a moment. "You have a big surgery in the morning." She and Sloan were doing a complicated procedure on a peds patient. She had been studying for it for days. He didn't want her to be tired or distracted.

"Right," she replied slowly. She carelessly pushed him onto his back before she flopped over onto the other side of the bed. She pushed her hair out of her face while she let out a long sigh. She wasn't sure if she could take much more of this.

Their relationship had never been better. Everyone knew about them now, Charles was okay with everything, and they were finally able to interact at the hospital like a couple. They had great conversation, they still played board games, watched movies, and studied for the Boards together, but they also went out on dates like a normal couple. They were in love and everything was perfect, yet they still weren't having sex. In fact, they didn't even do anything with the word sex in it!

'So,' she thought to herself, 'this must be what teenage boys feel like.' And she all of a sudden had much more sympathy for Alex Karev.

Jackson could tell that she was frustrated so he rolled over onto his side and placed a sweet kiss on her cheek. He draped his arm across her waist and started to rub soothing circles into her side.

"Your birthday is coming up," he began to change the subject. "What do you want?"

She turned her head towards him and answered seriously, "I want you to ravish me." She placed a hand on the back of his neck and roughly pulled his face towards hers. She tossed a leg over his hip and pressed her body against his as much as she could. "I don't understand what we're waiting for," she whispered. She kissed over his chin and down his neck. "I love you," she muttered between kisses, "and you love me. I don't get it."

She had just started to kiss down his chest when both of their pagers went off.

"Saved by the bell," April declared with a fake smile.

Jackson swore under his breath as he watched her leave the room. He was just trying to do the right thing but now he was absolutely terrified that he was really screwing things up.

* * *

"There's a major trauma coming into the pit that I should probably help with," Callie Torres stated in annoyance as she headed towards her office door.

However, the former Chief of Surgery stepped into her path and kept that sour, unpleasant expression plastered on her face. "Dr. Torres," she began in a condescending tone. "You have to deal with this situation."

The younger surgeon turned her head to hide the fact that she was rolling her eyes. She really didn't want to have this conversation, and she didn't want to be told how to do her job. She was the Chief of Surgery now, not Ellis Grey. A large part of her wanted to say that she didn't need a woman that was forced out of her position by the hospital board to tell her what to do, but very few people had the courage to speak to Ellis Grey like that. Also, the woman was retiring in three months so it would probably be easier to appease her than to fight with her.

It's just that what Ellis Grey wanted, Callie found ridiculous and unnecessary.

"This hospital is practically turning into a brothel," Dr. Grey ranted. "The number of sexual harassment lawsuits that could come out of this could ruin the hospital's reputation."

Again, Callie thought that everything that the general surgeon was saying was ridiculous. So what if there were a few new couples? Webber and Shepherd. Yang and her ex-husband. Avery and Kepner. Karev and a few nurses. Even the Chief of Surgery couldn't control the staff's sex lives, but she did have a point about sexual harassment issues.

Callie sighed in defeat before she responded. "I'll have HR draw up something in the morning."

* * *

Jackson changed out of his scrubs and slowly made his way out of the locker room. He would head down to the main lobby and wait for April there. He assumed that she was still with a patient or finishing up her charts until he spotted her figure walking towards one of the stairwells.

He jogged to catch up with her and he looked down at her with a smile. "Hey! Heading home?"

"Yeah," she answered shortly.

She pushed the door to the stairwell open and he followed her determinedly. "Do you want some company?" He asked with a small grin.

She made it down the first flight of stairs before she spun around to face him. "No, that's okay." She ran a hand through her hair and looked down at the floor. "I'm really tired."

He nodded in understanding. Their late night trauma had been a highway accident, a five car pileup. It had been hectic and exhausting. He could relate to her feeling tired. He knew that he would fall asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow. But he loved sleeping with her. In fact, he found himself more rested when he spent the night with her.

"Well I can still come over," he protested. "I can make you breakfast in the morning."

"That's okay," she repeated with a sigh. "I think that I just want to be alone."

He grabbed her hand and entwined their fingers. "April, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," she answered too quickly. "I'm fine. I just need my space tonight."

He frowned as he closely observed her facial expressions. He didn't quite buy what she was saying but he didn't want to push. "Okay," he replied slowly. "So I'll see you tomorrow?"

She nodded before pushing herself up onto the tips of her toes so that she could plant a quick kiss on his cheek. "Yup, tomorrow." She hitched her purse higher up her shoulder and turned around.

She ran down the stairs while Jackson continued to stand on the landing in confusion.

"Yeah," he whispered to himself. "I'm definitely screwing things up."

* * *

The next morning, everyone gathered at the base of the staircase for a mass meeting. April stood next to Meredith and determinedly avoided eye contact with Jackson. She just couldn't talk to him right now. She had been so turned on by his attitude during last night's trauma, he had been so confident and calm, and she had thought that a night apart would be enough for her to settle down but she was wrong. She was so frustrated and so mad at him. But the worst part was that she knew that that anger and frustration was only present to cover up her intense feelings of inadequacy.

He didn't _want _to have sex with her. That was the only possible explanation. He didn't find her that attractive or he didn't want her as much as he thought that he would, or something like that!

But it was a terrible feeling and one that she didn't want to deal with for much longer. Despite all of the wonderful things that he said and all of the unbelievable things that he had done for her, being with him was hard enough on her self-esteem on a normal day. She knew that he was too beautiful and too caring, and too _everything_ for her, and she just didn't have the self-confidence to deal with him refusing to have sex with her.

At least Alex had wanted her.

"Good morning, everybody!" Chief Torres began with a smile. She held up a piece of paper in her hand and looked towards it. "As part of a new hospital policy, everyone will be required to list any sexual relationships that they've had with other hospital employees."

People managed to contain their groans but there were many unpleasant facial expressions.

"You will sign it and then return the form to HR," Callie continued.

She had a fake smile plastered on her face and she was trying to talk with as much authority as possible, but it was difficult when she thought that this whole idea was utter bullshit. Something like this had the possibility to cause arguments, break up relationships, and reveal dirty secrets.

She already knew that she was going to have to lie on her form. She just wasn't ready for everybody to know yet. Her and Arizona's budding relationship was perfect the way that it was. It was nobody else's business.

"Are there any questions?" Nobody said anything so she forced another smile. "Great! You can pick up a form at the main nurses' station."

Everyone started to disperse and April quickly grabbed a form and retreated to the skills lab. She sat down at a bench and pulled a pen from her breast pocket. She signed and dated the form with a sigh. It was blank, as it should be. She had nothing to hide because she was still a virgin. Not even her boyfriend was on this list.

"So, do you think that they want past employees too?" Mark Sloan asked curiously as he breezed into the lab. He didn't wait for a response before he spoke again. "Ah well, I'll include it anyway."

He sat down across from April and wrote Addison's name on the piece of paper. "There!" He declared with a happy grin. He was proud that he had stopped whoring around since moving to Seattle. "One name, just like you."

The red-head chuckled humorlessly as she held up the paper for him to see.

Mark's brow furrowed in confusion. "It's blank. Aren't you going to write down Avery's name?" His mouth dropped open in realization as she shook her head. "Oh! You two haven't…? Really? Why not?"

"He doesn't want to," she answered with a disgruntled expression.

"He doesn't want to?" The attending repeated incredulously. "Is he gay?"

"No, he's not gay," April snapped quickly. "He's just…ugh," she huffed angrily. "I dunno…stupid." She angrily folded the piece of paper in her hand and shoved it into the pocket of her lab coat. "Whatever, I have a surgery to think about." She hopped off of her stool and shot him a smile before she headed towards the door. "I'm going to go and check on your post-ops."

Mark watched his student leave with a frown. She was really unhappy, and the way that he saw things, it was his responsibility to try and fix things for her.

* * *

After a very long morning in the pit, Jackson grabbed his lunch and sat at a table next to Cristina. "Hey, how's it going?"

Cristina dropped the pen that she was holding and glanced upward. "Juts filling out this stupid form for HR," she huffed.

Jackson grinned. He knew that something like this was bound to ruffle Cristina's feathers, for feminist reasons and probably because it brought back bad memories. His grin quickly disappeared, that stupid form didn't help improve his mood either. "I just finished mine, not that it took very long," he commented miserably. "I only had to put down one name."

Cristina stared at him in disbelief. "What? You and Kepner still haven't done it?" Her former sex friend just stared at her so she continued to speak. "You haven't cashed her v-card? Taken her maiden voyage? Popped her cherry?"

"Okay, stop talking," Jackson grimaced. He wasn't sure if he could handle another innuendo.

"Seriously though, why haven't you?" Jackson shifted in his seat and focused on his food while she smiled devilishly. "Is that why she's so pissed at you?" The red-head had been ignoring him all day. It was so obvious that even she had noticed.

Jackson nodded. "I think so. She didn't let me stay over last night. I just want to…I…"

He stopped his stuttering and Cristina grinned knowingly. "Aww, you love her too much," she teased. "Sooo cute," she chirped sarcastically.

Jackson rolled his eyes and mumbled to himself grumpily. He was about to come up with a snappy retort to shoot back at the woman next to him when he felt a presence looming over him. He looked upwards and was surprised to see the Head of Plastics. "Dr. Sloan?"

"Come with me Avery," he demanded briskly.

"Uhh…I'm kinda eating lunch."

Mark narrowed his eyes. "Now!"

Jackson got up out of his chair so fast that he almost knocked it over. He followed the attending out of the cafeteria and down a hallway. He quickly realized that they were heading towards the skills lab. He closed the door behind him and gulped at the feeling that he was about to be interrogated.

"Are you an idiot, Avery?" Mark questioned bluntly.

Jackson's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. That seemed like a rather odd question. "I would like to think not, sir."

"Good," Mark nodded. "Then why won't you have sex with your beautiful, talented, intelligent girlfriend?"

Jackson shifted his feet and turned his head. "No disrespect, but that's not really any of your business," he muttered.

"I'm making it my business. Consider this to be some sexual encouragement."

"Look," Jackson began in frustration. "It's her first time, and that's a lot of pressure on me! I could entirely shape her views on sex! One wrong move and she may never touch me ever again!"

He hadn't expressed these views to anyone, not even April herself, but he had been thinking about it for weeks. At first, he had held himself back out of respect for Charles, and then it had been because he had wanted them to get to know each other as boyfriend and girlfriend first, and now it was because he was afraid. It was starting to eat away at him and he wasn't sure how to stop it.

Mark arched an eyebrow and grinned cockily. "Not confident in your performance, Avery?"

"No, I am very confident in my performance," the younger man retorted quickly. "More than confident, but its nerve-wracking being a woman's first. And she's turned into a plastic surgeon, plastic surgeons are perfectionists. _And _I've never…" He trailed off and sheepishly looked down at his shoes.

"And what, Avery?" The attending probed nosily.

"I've never felt this way about a woman before," he responded in a nervous murmur. "I've never loved someone so much before. I've always tried not to have completely meaningless sex, but this…this is different than any relationship I've ever been in, and I don't want to screw it up with sex. She means too much to me."

From the corner of the room, he heard a stifled girlish squeal. He spun around and was surprised to see his girlfriend hiding away in the corner of the room between two filing cabinets. He turned back towards Sloan and saw that the man was grinning triumphantly. The older man nodded in approval before he quietly slipped out of the room.

Once they were alone, April stepped towards him with a bright smile. She had gone along with Sloan's plan because he had refused to take no for an answer, but she hadn't actually expected it to achieve anything. She was glad that she had been wrong.

"You are so sweet."

He was embarrassed and a little angry that Sloan had just completed duped him. "You weren't supposed to hear that."

She placed both of her hands on his waist and looked up at him lovingly. "You could have just told me. I've been thinking far worse things."

"I didn't know how to say it," he confessed. "I wasn't sure…I…it just sounds stupid," he sighed. "I'm a guy; I should be handling all this better."

She quickly shook her head. "It's not stupid at all, but I do think that you're wrong. Sex isn't going to ruin our relationship." She placed a kiss on the bottom of his chin and giggled. "I promise."

"You are so cute," he grinned. He raised both of his hands so that he could cup her face. He kissed her before he smiled sexily. "I'm coming over tonight."

She playfully arched an eyebrow as she felt her stomach flutter excitedly. "Oh really?"

He nodded before he gave her another passionate kiss. "Yes," he confirmed. His hands slid down to encircle her waist and he started to walk her backwards with a small smirk. "I'd add my name to that form for HR if I were you."

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**A/N: Please leave a review! :)**

**Next chapter: The residents go on fellowship interviews.**


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